Sweet Complications
by actions-we-remember
Summary: -I couldn't stand the end of TSFT, so I'm rewriting it! Karma- Gemma may have defeated the Tree of All Souls, but now she has a whole new set of problems. Will she ever get her life back to normal, and can she restore normalcy to the realms?
1. Chapter 1: Trust

**Okay, so this story started out being strictly self-theraputic...but it turned out pretty well, so I thought I'd share it! It takes place right after Gemma turns away from the three ladies and has Circe take her place.**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray, nor do I own these characters. I'm merely an obsessed fan.**

The next time I open my eyes, I don't know where I am. Everything around me is gray and murky, and my body feels as though it is under water. Panic threatens to overtake me as a hundred questions buzz in my mind. Where am I? What happened? Where is Kartik? My mind goes numb. I have to find Kartik; but how? Nothing around me is recognizable. There is no sound save for my frantic breathing. Tears threaten to fall as I look desperately around me, searching for some sign of life. Nothing.

_Gemma…_

My heart stops, then goes berserk. Kartik's voice, soft as a whisper and riddled with pain and fear, calls out to me. I thrash franticly, trying to find the source of that beautiful voice. But try as I might, nothing changes, nothing moves. The monotonous gray around me stays as it was, and still, the melodious voice calls, making my heart ache with desperation. Will I ever get out of here? Will I ever see Kartik again?

_Gemma…please…_

My body yearns to be with Kartik again, to hear his voice, but my brain starts shutting down. What is the point in living, in existing? I'll never be free of this strange place. Kartik's voice is nothing but a whisper of wind, a trick of the mind. One by one, my limbs stop struggling, giving themselves up to the strange power of the gray mist around me.

_Please…come back…_

No.

I refuse to give up. The pain in Kartik's voice is too much to bear; how can I leave him willingly, when I know the anguish it would cause him? My eyes snap open, a new determination coursing through my body. I lift my arms, as if groping for a wall in a dark room. There is nothing to touch, so I kick my legs a bit, as if swimming. This seems to do the trick. I feel a _whoosh_ of air as I am propelled slightly forward. My mouth is set as I swim onward through the mist, Kartik's voice the fuel to my aching limbs. After a few minutes of this, the fog seems to become less dense, as if it's creeping away. I can just barely make out figures, one, two, three of them, close by, and others swim into view, farther out. I hear Kartik calling my name, and I know that it comes from the shape closest to me, the one just inches from my face.

"Kartik," I mumble pathetically. The figures all gasp, and lean in closer.

"Gemma," Kartik breathes into my ear. "I am here."

"Don't leave…" my voice trails. It's so hard to breathe…

"I won't," Kartik promises, and I feel a sudden warmth on my forehead, and I know that it comes from his lips.

With that, the fog disappears completely, and I can make out the forms of Felicity and Ann, peering in at me over Kartik's shoulder, the three of them slightly disheveled. In the distance, I see Asha tending to Philon, and Gorgon trying to calm the angry snakes on her head. Before I can make out much else, however, a sharp, intense pain rips up my side, and I gasp, holding back the scream I want so desperately to make. I see Kartik's eyes widen in fear, then feel his hand working at my side.

"Breathe, Gemma," he commands, still looking at the wound in my side. "You will be okay. Just breathe."

I do as he says, though it pains me. I pull myself together enough to glance down. His capable hands are in a flurry as they work to cover the gash in cloth from his already torn shirt. Blood drips steadily, but is caught in another cloth before it could be soaked up into the Winterland's earth. The knife lies a few feet away, glittering silver and scarlet. I stifle a scream, but Kartik notices when my body stiffens. He looks up at me, his eyes reassuring.

"It's fine, Gemma," he murmurs softly. "I've got it. Don't worry."

I nod, and look up again. Fee and Ann hover nearby, their eyes wide in horror. I take in the sight of them. Neither one has a single pin in their hair left, and Fee's corset is missing. Ann has a rip in the front of her dress. I know I am no better.

"How are you feeling?" Ann asks tentatively.

I wrinkle my nose. "Wretched. What happened?"

"A lot. After you fell, the Tree…well, it _glowed_." Fee answered quickly, as if her voice would distract me from the pain, her eyes widening like an eager child's at the memory. "Amar collapsed, Kartik had stabbed him." My eyes drifted to Kartik's, and saw the pain still there. "Gorgon and Asha and Philon…they were amazing, Gemma. I've never seen such grace. There's not too many Winterland creatures left, and the ones that _are_ left surrendered. The centaurs are looking after them." I let my eyes drift back to Fee, and see her looking down at the ground, almost as if she's embarrassed.

"Fee, what's wrong?" I ask, concerned. I feel Kartik's hands slow.

Felicity looks up, her eyes anguished. "Gemma…I-I thought you were…dead." She whispered, then took a deep breath. "You told us to keep fighting…so I did. You were just lying there, Kartik was fighting Amar, no one else was around." She stuttered, obviously flustered. "So…oh, Gemma, I stabbed the Tree."

I look at my friend, confused. "So?"

Fee looked surprised. "You're not mad?"

"No," I respond. "Should I be?"

"Well, no, but-" Felicity looked at the ground again. "I would have thought that you would have wanted to do the honors. Seeing as you're the High Priestess, and all."

I laugh, but stop quickly to gasp from the pain in my side. Kartik's hands pick up speed again. "F-F-Fee, you p-play the p-p-part of the wo-woman warrior…better than I-I ever could. I'm sure you were sp-spectacular." I manage to sputter out between gritted teeth.

Felicity looks immensely relieved, and I find that I am truly glad that I wasn't the one to end Eugenia Spence. Looking up at the Tree, I see a spear sticking out from the heart of it. I feel Kartik's hands stop their work and look back to him. His eyes are turned to mine, and I see a longing in them that I know is echoed in my eyes. I feel Kartik's arm worm around my waist and help me into a sitting position. He leans in toward me, kissing my forehead.

"Most High," comes a voice, and I looked up to see Gorgon nearby. I nod at her, and she continues. "The remaining Winterlands creatures have made a request."

"Oh?" I ask, certain that I know what this request is, and also that I just might have to give it to them. "What is it?"

Gorgon looks at me, and I know that my hunch was correct. "They wish to be included in your alliance, Most High. They want a part of the magic."

Bloody hell.

Felicity makes an outraged sound. Ann looks horrified. Kartik stiffens next to me. After a few silent seconds, I make to stand, despite the slight pain, and Kartik helps me up. Gorgon never takes her eyes off of me.

"They can't possibly think that Gemma would give them magic!" Felicity spits, as mad as a wet cat. "Not after all this!"

"I don't claim to understand their logic. I only pass on the the messages." Gorgon replies calmly.

"All the same!" Fee glares over her shoulder at the few Winterlands creatures, all of whom are trying to sneak looks through the centaur's legs at my reaction. I sit silently, thinking it over, one arm around Kartik, the other on my patched side.

"Fee, calm down." Ann's quiet voice calls. "Gemma will do what she can. They have all surrendered. And if they try to revolt again, we have greater numbers than they do."

"Gorgon, tell the creatures that I will consider their request." I say, startling Fee out of her outraged fuming. She stares open-mouthed at me, and I am tempted to conjure a fly to zoom into her mouth. Ann and Gorgon seem unfazed, as if they knew that I would say that. Kartik remains at my side, his face (and reaction) hidden from my view.

"As you wish, Most High," Gorgon says, bowing, and turning to leave.

"Wait!" I call. Gorgon pauses, looking at me. "Tell them that for me to grant them the request, I will have to have something in return." I take a deep breath. "I will need their loyalty, sworn to me, and I need it in writing." Gorgon nods, and continues on her way. Fee looks at me again, anger once more in her eyes.

"_What_ are you thinking, Gemma?" she hisses at me. "We _cannot _trust them! And what will a piece of paper do? They will just go back on their word!"

I close my eyes, too drained to deal with Fee's wrath. "I _know_ that. But if I'm going to give the magic to the creatures of the realms, that includes them. If they go back on their word, I'm sure the others will take care of it before I get the chance." I say, pointing towards the Hajin, the forest folk, and Gorgon. "I also know that a piece of paper isn't much, but it can serve as proof of their surrender in the chance that they _do_ revolt." I sense that Felicity is about to speak again, so I hold my hand up towards her. "Not now. I said that I will consider it, and I will, but I don't have any intentions of accepting or declining their request right now. All I am interested in is bed." The last part is a lie, but only partly one. A bed could certainly be a part of my other interest, but they needn't know that.

Fee still looks angry, but she turns and walks briskly away from the Tree, towards the gate to the Middlelands. Ann throws me a half-apologetic look and trots after her, more graceful here than ever before, leaving me alone with Kartik. I see Ann stop and reach out towards a figure. The figure accepts her hand and lets himself be dragged towards the gate, and I realize that it's Fowlson. I sigh and lean into Kartik's chest slightly, breathing in his delicious scent.

Kartik chuckles slightly. "I think it's time that we leave the realms."

"Certainly," I reply, and I let him steer me after my friends. Forest folk and the Hajin work together to recover those lost from our side, and many of them pause to bow as I pass. A few bald heads poke up from the water, and I scowl at the sirens, willing them to leave. I nod towards Gorgon, who is still watching over the Winterlands creatures with the centaurs, and to Bessie, who had joined the watch. The creatures make no effort to hide their staring as I pass, despite the hissing from Gorgon's snakes. Their dead and demented eyes are disconcerting, but I meet their stares with what I hope is diplomacy, though I am sure that I merely look like Elizabeth attempting to think.

"Lady Hope," Asha calls as we pass her and Philon, bowing to me. I return the gesture, taking pleasure from the beaming smile on Asha's face.

"How is Philon?" I ask, motioning to the creature.

"Healing, Lady Hope." Asha replies, still smiling. "He will live to wield the magic another day."

I nod, glad to hear that the majestic Philon would live. "Asha, I hate to leave you here, but-"

"Go," Asha says before I could finish my statement. "We have things under control. You need to return to your world for now, Lady Hope. We shall take care of things until you return to us."

I bow, calling my thanks, and continue on my way, Kartik still at my side. He is silent, and it worries me.

"Kartik," I start, afraid to go on, not knowing what to say. "What's-"

He looks at me, then shakes his head a little, tightening his hold on my waist. "Not here."

I nod, and walk on in silence, content, for the moment, to just hold him. We approach the gate to the Meadowlands, avoiding the bodies of the dead all the way. Even at a glance, it is easy to see that most of the bodies were those of the Winterlands creatures, and I am relieved to see that we didn't have as many deaths. But even through that relief comes the guilt. So many people, lost, leaving behind a trail of despair. Mother, Amar, Circe, Pippa…

Pippa. My heart aches to think of what had become of my beautiful friend. I remember her black hair, her vibrant eyes, her romantic mind. I yearn to have her back, to have the friend that I had made and lost. But even though my pain is great, I know it is nothing compared to that of Fee's. Despite not understanding the preference of women to men, I can certainly sympathize with my beloved, feisty friend. I know the pain she feels at losing a loved one. I know the hopelessness that Felicity is feeling, despite her reluctance to show it.

Kartik and I emerge from the Winterlands, blinking in surprise. The Middlelands is swamped with sunlight from the perpetual sunset, and green is everywhere. I see the maze that I had once played in with my friends, and instead of the vines, there are lovely bushes, trimmed neatly as though by a skilled gardener. I look half-heartedly for the sign of a castle's tower, hoping that it would be resurrected, with Pippa, the real Pippa, at its entrance. I know in my heart that it would never be, and so I kept walking, looking around in bewilderment. Kartik seems just as bemused as I, his eyes open to take everything in.

Soon we reach the familiar path that would take us to the garden. The Cave of Sighs looms over us, the sensual carvings taunting us. We walk on, eyes trained to the path, fighting the temptation to stop, fighting our desire for each other. It is neither the time nor the place. Even so, neither of us can resist pulling the other closer, tightening our holds. Kartik's hand travels slightly higher on my waist, avoiding my bandage, and getting closer to my breast. My breath catches in my throat, and Kartik, sensing the danger, lowers his hands again.

The runes of the legendary Order members who had chosen to accompany the three women comes into view, and I walk into the hallway readily, Kartik following close behind. I can feel his breath on my neck, scattering my thoughts. I am constantly aware of his close proximity, and curse the little space between us. But then we are through the door, back on the grounds of Spence. I look up to the roof, and notice a few missing gargoyles. A number of others are missing chunks of stone. I feel for their loss, despite their creepy appearances. I can see Ann and Felicity, not too far away, sitting together near the forest. Fowlson is nowhere to be seen. They stand and walk towards us as we make our way to the chapel. The four of us walk to the chapel together, a silent quartet.

"By awl the saints!" I hear Brigid wheeze when we are within hearing distance. "I thot you were awl gone for good! Tha' man came back, but 'e wouldn't say a word 'bout wot 'appened." Brigid slows, counting our number. "Bu' where is Miss McCleethy?"

"I'm afraid she didn't make it, Brigid," Ann murmurs softly, and Brigid gasps, making the sign of the cross quickly.

Mrs. Nightwing greets us at the great wooden doors, Mother Elena's body in her arms. My heart pangs for the old woman.

"How- what-" I hear Ann's concerned voice from behind me, but she is silenced by Mrs. Nightwing.

"Shush. Her heart failed her. The wretched creatures never got the chance to come inside."

Behind Mrs. Nightwing, I can see the petrified faces of the girls, each one pale and wide-eyed, some of the younger ones peeking out through the others' skirts. I sigh, knowing that I have some memory modifying to do once they are all asleep. Brigid shepherds them into a group and leads them away from us, towards the school, some of them turning to look at us in our battle-weary glory. I watch them go wearily. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a small crowd of Gypsies standing near the edge of the woods. A few of the gasp when they see Mother Elena's body. Mrs. Nightwing goes to them, and one of the men takes hold of the frail woman's corpse, and walks back to the camp. The others follow him, and Mrs. Nightwing makes her way to us.

We follow Mrs. Nightwing back the way we had come. She asks us what had become of Miss McCleethy and Fowlson, and also how we had managed to destroy Eugenia. I let Fee tell her tale, listening in myself, not having had the chance to see it.

"What a story." my headmistress exclaimed. "And none of you were hurt?"

"Gemma was," Fee admitted, gesturing towards my side, where my bandages are visible over my torn corset.

"Only a little." I reply sheepishly, attempting to cover my bandages. As I do, I feel a small bit of magic unintentionally leaving my fingers, and the dull ache in my side subsides. I find I am avoiding Mrs. Nightwing's gaze, as she made an disapproving sound and walks even faster towards her school, leaving the rest of us to totter tiredly after her. I feel guilt settle in my stomach when I feel the magic in me. I should have bound it when I was in the realms.

I can see Brigid peering out at us through a window, a lamp held in her hand.

"Miss Doyle, a word, if you please." Mrs. Nightwing says over her shoulder, and walks a little ways away. I follow, Kartik still at my side.

"Yes, Mrs. Nightwing?"

She looks at Kartik questioningly, and I shrug.

"Well," Mrs. Nightwing turns her attention back to me. "It appears that the secret is out."

"So it would seem, yes." I reply, too tired for proper manners.

"Miss Doyle, I am sure you will understand when I ask you-"

"I will modify the girls' memories, Mrs. Nightwing." I cut her off, knowing what she was hinting at. "If, and only if, you excuse me, and Misses Bradshaw and Worthington as well, from lessons tomorrow. I'm sure you understand." I add.

Mrs. Nightwing looks taken aback, but nods. "Very well. Thank you, Miss Doyle." Her face softens. "For everything." And with that, she turns around and walks into the school.

I sigh, turning to Kartik. "You don't mind…?"

He shakes his head, and walks after me as I wander the halls, pressing my hands to the sleeping girls' heads, turning the real-life experience into a strange and haunting dream. When I am done, I look for Brigid, and find her downstairs, in the kitchen. I offer to remove the memory.

"No thanks, luv," she replies, smiling at me. "Oi'll keep the mem'ry, if you please."

**Oooh, I wonder what's wrong with Kartik? Ha, wait for Chapter 2 to find out! Reviews would be lovely, by the way.**

**Much love, Shes.A.Dreamer**


	2. Chapter 2: Lust

**And now...Chapter 2 of my first fanfic!!! Thanks so much to the people who reviewed chapter one. You guys are my very first reviews EVER! A big cyber box of chocolates to you guys!**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray...but you already knew that, didn't you?**

When I am done, Kartik and I return to the entrance hall, clutching each other. I can't hold it in anymore; I twist into Kartik's body, pressing myself to him, and bury my head in his shoulder, my body shaking with sobs. I stand there, trembling and crying, for a few minutes. Kartik strokes my hair soothingly, though I know that inside, he is hurting as well, and I feel awful for making _him_ comfort _me_. I pull away.

"Come with me," I whisper, pulling him gently after me as I step onto the staircase. I lead the way as we tread up the steps up to my room. When I open the door, I find it to be empty. It seems Ann is spending the night comforting Felicity. I could kiss her for it.

I let go of Kartik and walk to the bed. Behind me, I can hear his near-silent footsteps following me. I turn and sit down, facing Kartik, who stays on his feet. Reaching up, I find his hands and hold them, looking at his face. Behind the careful mask he has donned since returning from the realms, I can see the pain that I had know was there all along.

"Kartik," I whisper, squeezing his hands gently. "Tell me. What's wrong?"

I don't have to ask. But I did. I know why he is upset. Had he not just had to kill his own brother? Somehow, though, I think having him tell me himself would help him to heal, in a way.

He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes. When he opens them again, the mask is gone, the pain clearly etched on his face.

"Amar…" he whispered, eyes glittering with tears that I know he's trying so desperately to keep back. "I killed him."

"He was already dead." I say, trying to soothe him. Kartik shakes his head.

"I know." He seems tortured. "I just…he was there…in front of me. Even though I knew he was gone, I thought, for a moment…"

"Yes?"

Kartik sighed. "I thought for a moment that he was back. His eyes cleared, his posture changed. He was my brother again, the brother I had lost back in India. He spoke to me like he had before he'd died, asked me to give him peace."

I wait patiently, sure that there is more. When Kartik doesn't speak, I whisper, "And you did. You fulfilled your brother's last request."

"Gemma, that wasn't really my brother."

"I know that. But somewhere, underneath the creature he had become, Amar was still there. I know it. He's spoken to me before, too, remember?" I say, stroking his hands with my thumbs. I feel like I'm grasping at straws a bit, but I can't help it. It pains me to see him like this, hurt and upset. But Kartik's eyes nevertheless looks thoughtful, then hopeful. I know that he is realizing the airy truth behind my words, and that he feels much better for it. "And in that case, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. You simply helped your brother move on." I stand, releasing his hands and instead cradling his face. His eyes have lost some of their sadness, but there is a whole new layer of it now that I know will take even more coaxing on my part to heal. I stand on my toes, and bring our faces together in a gentle kiss. When we break apart, I can feel Kartik's arms tighten around me, and I look into his eyes to see fear in them. Concern floods into my brain. "But I have the feeling that Amar isn't the only thing you're thinking about. What is it?"

Kartik hesitates. When he speaks, it is in a whisper. "You."

I start, surprised. "Pardon?"

"Gemma," Kartik's voice sounds like it had before I had come to by the Tree: pained and afraid. "Gemma…I thought I had lost you. You seemed-" he stops, apparently unable to go on. I squeeze his hands softly in encouragement. Breathing deeply, he continues. "You seemed so cold, so lifeless. I was terrified that you were gone to me, that after having to kill my own brother, I now had to deal with losing you, and with that, losing my life. I- I thought I would never again feel you in my arms, feel your kiss." He closes his eyes again. I am surprised. It was just as I had felt when I was bodiless, when I could only hear his beautiful, pained voice. "But then you said my name, and I thought I was dreaming. It was the most beautiful sound, but also the most haunting. But there you were, breathing, speaking, _living_. Even now, I'm not so sure that it isn't a dream."

I put my head on his chest. I know perfectly well how he is feeling, had felt the same when I thought myself to be beyond his reach.

"I'm fine, though," I breathe, stroking his chest lightly with my finger. "You have me again. We can be together."

"That's true," Kartik says. The next thing I know, his mouth is covering mine in a kiss, his arms encircling my waist, pressing me tightly to him. I kiss him back, and move my hands to the back of his neck, never wanting to let him go. I feel his tongue on my lips, and open my mouth. I feel his arms leave my waist, and then he's lifting me, holding me close to his chest. I don't protest; my mouth is already occupied.

Kartik lowers me onto the bed, releasing my lips from his briefly. He moves onto the bed next to me, sliding right to my side, our eyes locked, each mirroring the other's desire, our passion. He pushes himself on top of me, and I welcome the additional weight readily. I let my mouth wander over him: his lips, his neck, his shoulders. I feel his fingers working to unbutton my dress, and I arch my back to make it easier for him. My hands continue to trace him, to feel him, moving from his chest to his shoulders. He manages to finish unbuttoning my dress, and pulls it over my head. Kartik kisses my neck, and I moan quietly. Reaching down, I kick off my shoes and rip off my stockings. Kartik's fingers continue their unfastening, this time on my corset. I slip my fingers down his shirt, unbuttoning what buttons had survived and, when that is done, pushing the sleeves down his muscular arms. I throw it away into the corner of the room, just as he manages to finish on my corset.

When I am free of that, he ducks his head down to kiss my stomach, now only covered by my thin chemise, sending a warm wave down my body. I gasp wildly as he runs his hands up my legs, my thighs, my hips, bringing my chemise up with them. I close my eyes, and feel him move to press his warm lips where the chemise no longer covers my skin. I feel my heart beat erratically, hear my breathing go ragged. He continues to lift my chemise, kissing my bare skin every so often. I moan again when his lips touch my lower stomach, and hear him echo that when I am finally freed of my clothing. I let him drink in the sight of me for a second, then reach for his trousers with eager fingers.

"Gemma…" he groans as we kick this last bit of clothing from the bed, then moves his lips downward, toward my chest. I feel his hands wandering my body, a shiver of excitement following his touch, and let mine do the same. His lips find mine, and I let my tongue explore his mouth, reveling in his bare skin touching mine. I set his mouth free, and let mine trail down his body. My hands trace patterns in his skin as I kiss him everywhere. I hear him moan again. Our lips meet once more; I cling myself to him, loathing the little space that I can't close between us. His arms meet firmly around me, pulling me into his body. I hitch my leg around his hip, and he groans into my mouth. His fingers entwine themselves into my curly hair. I push myself over him, gasping for air, but reluctant to stop kissing him. He lifts his head slightly to my neck, nuzzling it. I feel his mouth open and his teeth nip my skin teasingly.

"Kartik…" I gasp, tracing the lines of his structured face. He looks at me, and I at him, our eyes expressing our wishes for us. And then we are everywhere, and he is everywhere, inside, outside. The sheets tangle around our thrashing bodies, but we pay them no mind. All we know, all we care about, is each other, is making our love and passion known.

Later, I lay in his arms, both of us panting slightly. The sheets lay on the floor, forgotten, for, despite our lack of clothing, the room is hot. My mind spins dizzily, remembering the feel of Kartik's warm skin, the sound of his soft voice. He plants a kiss on my head, and I sigh in contentment.

"I could hold you all day, Miss Doyle," Kartik murmurs into my hair, and I feel myself blushing.

"I would like that," is the only reply I can think of. Kartik laughs.

"Would you now?"

"Very much." I shimmy in closer, running my fingertip over the contours of his neck.

"Hmm.." Kartik twirls a lock of my hair around his finger. I watch him.

"What are you thinking?" I ask after a few minutes of easy silence.

Kartik blinks and looks at me. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I want to know."

"Fine. I was thinking about you." He kisses me. "More specifically, I was thinking of last night."

Bloody hell. I'm _definitely_ blushing now. "Oh? And what about it?"

Kartik laughs again. "I was thinking about how much you mean to me. About how beautiful you are. About how much I want to give you."

"You don't have to give me anything." I say, my heart swelling.

"I know that. You seem content to just have me. But that doesn't seem even. You give me everything; love, happiness, excitement. But what have I given you?"

I kiss his neck. "The same. And more."

Kartik smiles, but shakes his head. "No, Gemma. For us to be together…we don't have an equal relationship. I have everything to gain by being with you: love, a home, even wealth. But you have everything to lose. Your reputation, you inheritance, and possibly even your family. It's hardly fair."

He has a point. But I don't care. "Kartik, none of that matters to me."

"Oh, really? So you wouldn't mind if your family disowned you, if you lost your inheritance, or if everywhere you went, whispers and gossip followed?"

Yes. "No."

"Liar." Blast.

I sigh. "Fine, Kartik. Those things _do_ matter to me. They _have_ to. But none of it really matters if I can't share it with you. And if, when I get you, we can't share it, then I don't want it. Any of it."

"Really, Gemma," Kartik murmurs into my neck. "I don't want to take anything more from you."

"And what, pray tell, _have _you taken from me?" I ask, smoothing his waving black hair with the tips of my fingers.

Kartik laughs, and I gasp at the sudden vibration. "Your virtue, for one."

My breathing is labored, and when I speak, my voice wavers. "Oh. That." I say lamely, then mentally wince. _Smooth, Gemma_.

He laughs again, and I close my eyes, groaning softly. Kartik's hands rest on my breasts, and I bite my lip. His mouth opens on my neck, and I feel his tongue barely brushing my skin. My grip on him tightens. Kartik shifts the two of us so that he is over me again, balancing his weight on his hands. He lowers his face to my neck again, and I feel his rough breathing, mirroring my own.

"Yes," he whispers. "I have taken too much from you."

I shake my head, partially to protest, and partially to clear it. "I wanted to give it to you. You have taken nothing that was not yours already."

"Hmm…" he hums, sending a mad desire from my head to my toes. I lift my hands to the back of his neck, clutching him to me, tangling my fingers in his hair. His mouth travels the length of my chest, his hands explore my breasts. My own hands manage to disentangle themselves to travel downwards, towards a once-secret place. Our matching groans of pleasure send tingles down my spine, and I throw myself into pleasing him. Once again, we become part of each other, feeling everything, from the smallest kiss to the softest gasp.

* * *

When I wake, the room is flooded with the light of late morning. I can feel Kartik's arms wrapped protectively around me, and feel our bare skin touching. Sometime in the night, one of us had gotten hold of the sheets, and I find that, despite the warm air, it is very comfortable, here in Kartik's arms.

I unfurl my cramped legs and yawn hugely. Kartik stirs slightly next to me. I look over at him, and my heart skips a beat. Or five.

His lovely face is just inches from my own, eyes closed in sleep. His dark hair lies sweetly on his head, one stray lock falling into his eyes, not unlike my brother's. He looks so beautiful, so serene, it makes my heart soar to know that he is mine, and I his. At the moment, I can't think of anything more pleasant than waking up and seeing him first thing, every morning. I stretch my neck a bit, and kiss him lightly. He smiles, and opens his eyes.

"Good morning," he breathes, lifting a hand to tuck a strand of copper hair behind my ear.

I smile, and whisper back, "Good morning."

Kartik looks at the window. "I think it is more afternoon than morning."

"True," I say, then worm my way closer to him, tucking my head into his shoulder. "Not that I care."

"I wouldn't expect you to." Kartik laughs.

"All the same," I kiss his nose and sit up, the sheet falling away to reveal my bare skin. Kartik eyes me hungrily. "I think I should get dressed."

Kartik raises an eyebrow. "And what will you change into? Your clothing is all at your grandmother's house. And what you have here-" he gestures toward the heap on the floor, "-is torn and bloodied."

"I'm sure I'll find something," I reply, disentangling my legs from his and walking slowly towards my trunk, searching for something that I could wear. I find my white school uniform at the back of my wardrobe, and walk over to the bed with it in hand. Kartik watches me as I slip back into an old, itchy chemise that I detest, and silently steps into his own clothes as I pull on my dress. I reach for my corset. "Kartik, could you-?"

"Help you with your corset?" he asks, standing, laughter in his eyes.

"Well, yes," I reply. Kartik nods, and I brace myself against the wall. He chuckles slightly, and pulls gently on the binds. I shake my head. "You have to pull harder than that."

"What if I'd rather you kept your natural shape?" he retorts, but pulls on the corset again, this time with a little more force. We finally manage to tie up all the strings correctly, albeit a little looser than usual, and I turn to face him.

"You know," Kartik muses, staring at me. "I much prefer taking that _off_ ofyou."

I smile, and wrap my arms around his shoulders. I stand on my toes and kiss him softly. When we pull apart, walk away to slip into my dress. I finish with that, and return to him, enfolding myself into his hold once more.

"I wish nighttime would last forever." I mumble into his shoulder, watching his muscles move under his skin as he circles his arms around me.

He kisses my head. "I know."

Sighing again, I let go of Kartik and step up to my mirror. My hair is a mess from last night, and I know that I won't have a hope of going about my day undetected until I work a miracle on it. Sitting down, I run a brush through the unruly curls, counting the strokes silently, and gaze at Kartik in the mirror. I watch him walk a few steps away to sit on the corner of my bed, his eyes on my hands as they comb my hair. Neither of us says a word, but the silence is a comfortable one, and we don't feel the need to break it with senseless chatter. It's one of the things I love about Kartik.

Love.

I hear someone walking past the door outside. I stop my brushing and turn my head in the direction of the noise. From the muffled complaints about a bad back, I take it to be Brigid. Kartik hears her, as well. He sits up straighter, eyes alert, but Brigid walks on, not so much as pausing at the door. It's as if she doesn't remember last night at all, though I hadn't touched her mind with magic. Kartik and I look at each other.

"It might be best if you go downstairs," Kartik says, nodding towards the door.

I know he's right. I just don't want to leave him. "And where will you go?"

Kartik stands and walks over to me, taking the brush from my hand. He runs it through my copper locks, sending tremors through my body.

"I suppose I could go to the gypsies…" he muses. I freeze, not wanting him to go, especially not to the gypsies. Seeing my face, he relents. "I could come back tonight, Gemma. You have lessons to go to, and I cannot stay here, in your room, for days on end."

I shake my head slightly. "Talk to Mrs. Nightwing. I'm sure she would let you stay at the school." I take a shaky breath. "Please?"

Kartik stops brushing my hair. He puts the comb down, and turns my face around to his. Pressing his palms to my cheeks, he brings my forehead to his lips.

"Even if she were to let me stay," he says, lowering his eyes level with mine, "I wouldn't be able to stay with you, not during the day. The gypsies are the safest place for me then, and later, I'll climb the vines and spend the night with you."

I pout, fully aware that I'm acting like some lovesick fool of a girl, and hating myself for it. "But what if the gypsies don't take you back?"

"Then I will hide out in your room, like some crook out to steal your virtue." he kisses my forehead again, then lets go of my face, putting his hands on mine. "Don't worry, Gemma. I will never be too far away." I nod, knowing that I have lost the battle.

"When will you come back to me?" I finger the hem of his sleeve, toying with it. "After dinner?"

"If that is when you want me, then yes, I will come."

Sighing, I let go of his sleeves and rest my forehead on my palm. My brain works to think of an alternate plan, one that doesn't involve Kartik living with gypsies.

My head shoots up. "The boathouse! Kartik, you could stay in the boathouse!"

Kartik raises an eyebrow. "I could, yes."

I smile. "Please, Kartik? It would be so much closer! And during the day, you could roam around in the woods, if you want. I could even visit you, during meals, and whenever my teachers let us outside. No one would know, except for you and me!" I watch Kartik's face eagerly, waiting for his answer, hating my childish need to have him nearby.

He returns my smile, and nods. "Alright, I will stay in the boathouse. Until dinnertime. I'm not willing to give up my time with you."

I have to force back a squeal of delight, but cannot prevent myself from throwing my arms around Kartik happily. He laughs and returns the embrace. When we let go of each other, I see a twinkle in his eyes.

"I don't think I can deprive you of food any longer," he laughs, gesturing to my considerably thinner figure, thanks to my corset.

I groan. "That was a horrible joke, Kartik."

"It was funny, and you know it." he leans in and kisses the tip of my nose before standing, pulling me to my feet as well. "Now, head downstairs and get Brigid to send some food your way."

"But what about you?" I ask. "You need to eat as well."

"Don't worry," he replies, already halfway to the window. "I'll find something."

"But-"

"Gemma," he turns around, eyes scolding. "Don't you trust me yet? I'll be fine."

I nod. "Tonight, then."

"Of course."

He's gone.

I turn back to my mirror, missing him already. My reflection blinks back at me, hair hanging loose around my shoulders. I reach for my pins to secure the curls into an acceptable hairstyle. When I am done, I peer closely at my reflection.

My cheeks are slightly flushed, paired with emerald eyes that are alive with an emotion that I'm still a bit unfamiliar with. The corners of my pink lips are turned up slightly. But even besides all that, my face is not that of a girl anymore. I'm becoming a woman.

_Not yet, Gemma,_ a voice in my head corrects. _You haven't had your debut yet._

My heart stops. The debut. I hadn't given it much thought, what with the trouble in the realms, but now that that is over (with the exception of binding the magic), there is nothing to distract me. After the debut, my season will start. How can my relationship with Kartik, which is frowned upon by society for so many reasons, even have a hope to survive that? Even so, I can't stand the thought of living without him. It's pure agony to just be apart from him now, even knowing that he'll be back tonight.

_You can't live this way forever. Be a good girl, Gemma._

I shake my head to clear it of the nagging voice. I don't _have_ to have a season. I'll let my grandmother throw me a party, if she wants, to appease her. It will be a sort of good-bye to the lady I have been groomed to become, so that I can be the woman I intend to be. But after that…I don't want to spend my life with anyone other than Kartik, and I'm sure that he feels the same way, so what's the point in having a season at all? Grandmama can't argue with me. I'll be my own woman, capable of living my own life, and besides, with Father gone, Tom will be my legal guardian, not her. I look into my reflection's eyes defiantly.

_That's it, Gem, _I tell myself. _You'll have a debut, then sit out on your season. You and Kartik will make it work._

I stand, shaking off the last of my doubts. It is my life, and I will do with it as I please.

**Oooh, that was interesting! I've never written a love scene before (nor do I have much experience to draw upon, either). Please, please, PLEASE review so that I can work on my skills. Plus, my ankle's busted and I could use the extra cheer. Thanks, lovelies!**

**Wishing the throbbing would stop, **

**Shes.A.Dreamer**


	3. Chapter 3: Lost

**Wow, chapter 3! Thanks so, so, SO much to everyone who's reviewed and/or added the story to their favorites. And those who have added me as their favorite authors...I'm floored. Truly, I am. Also, thanks for the 'get well soon's. My ankle is better, by the way. And huge, ginormous thanks to LunaEquus for recommending me in 'The Great Rakshana' (which is simply fabulous, I might add). Expect huge hugs and kisses this summer. And now...chapter 3!!**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray, nor do I own the characters. No matter how much I wish I did.**

Walking down the stairs, I can't help but feel a little out of place. Just last night, creatures from the realms had been in these very halls, tormenting the girls who weren't supposed to know that they even existed. I can still hear their terrified screams echoing in my head, and walk faster on my way to the kitchens, avoiding the great hall.

When I enter the kitchen, Brigid is standing at the stove, staring out of the window absent-mindedly. I clear my throat softly to announce my presence. She jumps.

"Good morning, Brigid," I say sweetly as she catches her frightened breath.

"Mornin'?" Brigid wheezes, shaking her head and clutching her chest. "It's right past noon! An' you nearly scared me 'alf to death, I don' mind sayin'!"

"My apologies," Ah, old, reliable Brigid. I can always count on her to find something to complain about. "Brigid, you wouldn't happen to have any food lying about? It seems that I missed breakfast…"

Brigid wordlessly walks over to the nearest cabinet, reaches in, and pulls out an apple. She hands it to me, and nods towards a jar labeled 'tea'. I watch her movements, noting her anxiety. She seems more apprehensive than usual.

"Lunch is bein' served soon enuf." She turns to walk out of the kitchen. "Tha' should 'old you over 'til then." She disappears quickly through the door.

"Thank you, Brigid," I mumble under my breath. I can't say I blame her for her eagerness to get away from me. It was I, in effect, that had brought the creatures here in the first place. And she is one of the few people left in the school that still know the truth. I walk out into the hall. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Brigid scurrying away.

I look around, feeling suddenly trapped. Fresh air. That's what I need. I turn and head for the doors, the light shining invitingly through the clear glass. I push through the doorway, and turn my face up to the sun's rays happily. A light breeze catches hold of my skirts, ruffling them. I fight the urge to tear off my shoes and stockings and run wildly across the grass. Instead, I settle for a ladylike stroll in the direction of the woods, doing my best to avoid detection from one of the many windows of Spence. The last thing I need is for one of the girls to see me and start a fuss.

Once I break through the first line of trees, I drop the mannerly façade with a sigh. I dart between the trees, running my hands over their bark and leaves. When my curls start to unpin themselves, I let them fall. There is no one around to chastise me, and the knowledge of that is liberating. I swing myself around a tree joyfully, loving the wind in my face. I find an ancient tree, bent double with age. The trunk is large, and the grass comfortable. Sitting down, I lean into the withered bark with a contented sigh. I close my eyes and drift off into a light nap, dreaming of Kartik.

I don't know how long I've stayed here in the shelter of the old tree. By the time I open my eyes again, the sun has dropped slightly in the sky, and the wind is a little more persistent than before.

_Bad luck, Gemma,_ I think, looking up to the sky. _You missed lunch._

To be honest, I don't really care. It's wonderful to be able to wander about, doing whatever I want to do. I'm positively sick of being told how to act, who to see, what to say. I don't want to become that cookie-cutter mold of a girl, with hardly a brain cell to her name. What I want is to be Gemma, to run and talk and live the way I say I should, and no one else. Only I should be able to dictate how I live my life.

_Come, now,_ That voice in my head corrects. _You wouldn't mind if Kartik was there to tell you what to do!_

True. I would like very much if I had Kartik here with me for the rest of my life.

_Told you so._ The voice says smugly.

_Shut it._ I growl back.

That's it. I've completely lost it. I'm talking to myself.

I wander back in the general direction of Spence, not hurried in the least. It's pure bliss to be able to drift about on my own.

"Gemma! _There_ you are! I've been looking _everywhere_ for you! Where have you been?"

"Walking," I say simply as Ann stumbles through the trees towards me, slightly out of breath. "Did you need me for something?"

"Not me, no."

"Well, then."

"Wait!" Ann hurries to my side. "That doesn't mean that I don't want to _talk_ to you. How's your side?"

I sigh, then continue on my way. I love Ann dearly, but sometimes she's a bit much. "It's fine. The magic took care of the wound yesterday. What do you want to talk about, Ann?"

"Last night would be a good start." Ann stops walking, her hand on her side. "Could we stop for a moment? I've been running after you all afternoon and I can hardly breathe for it."

"Of course. What time is it anyway?" I ask, avoiding the first part of her statement.

"It was just after four o'clock when I left." Ann narrows her eyes. "Don't beat around the bush. You didn't bind the magic to the realms, correct?" I nod. She sighs, then continues. "So what does that mean?"

"It means…" I pause, not entirely sure myself. "It means that we still have more work to do."

Ann groans. "I thought you would say that. Are you still thinking about going through with the alliance?"

"Of course." I say, looking at Ann suspiciously. What had happened to the quiet, sensitive Ann that I had grown so used to? Had Fee somehow taken over Ann? "What other choice do I have?"

"Well," Ann looks up at the sky before continuing. "Felicity and I were talking about the Winterlands creature's offer last night. It gave me an idea." She looks back down at me, a nervous yet excited gleam in her eyes. "What if you bound the magic to the _realms_, and not the creatures in it?"

I'm silent for a moment, thinking it over. Would that work? "Good thought, Ann. But how would I do that? It's not like I can say 'Oh, terribly sorry, but I've decided that I'm _not_ going to divide the magic between you. I'm going to give it to the ground instead.' Yes, they would love that. Philon would have me murdered right on the spot."

"I know that! But think about it, Gemma. It's the only truly fair way to divide the magic. Even if you do create an alliance, you don't have a hope of including every single little creature in it. What if you accidently exclude someone? Or what if you give one group more magic than another? That could lead to another rebellion, one with even worse consequences. This way, you can divide the magic equally, and no one has the right to complain. Binding the magic to the realms will give all creatures an equal amount of it. It's what they wanted, isn't it?"

"Alright, I'll think about it." I close my eyes. Just what I need. Another thought to occupy my cluttered mind. Splendid. "Just answer me one thing. Why isn't Felicity down here, showing off her own brilliant half-thought out plan?" As soon as the words leave my mouth, I wish I could take them back. The confident Ann is gone, replaced with the shy, insecure girl, head down and eyes averted. "Ann, I'm sorry. Truly, I am. It's just…I'm lost in all this. It's all much too much for one person to handle. I didn't mean to take it out on you. It's hardly your fault that I'm in this mess."

"It's alright, Gemma. I understand." Ann's voice still sounds hurt, and I can't help but feel wretched. She was only trying to help. I make my way over to her and put an arm around her shoulder.

"Come on, Ann," I chirp, doing my best to be happy. "Cheer up. Just think: soon, very, very soon, we'll be done with saving the realms. All will be back to normal. We can play in the garden again, just like we used to. Wouldn't you like that?" Ann smiles, her eyes shining again, and I feel relieved. She can be just as easy to perk up as she is to dispirit. "We'll dance and throw grand parties, just you, me, and Fee." Silently, I add Kartik to our imagined party list. "You can sing for us, and we'll ride Gorgon's boat and explore even more than we have." I feel my own heart lifting. It's invigorating to imagine the happy future ahead of us.

"We can go anywhere we please, right, Gemma?" Ann asks tentatively.

"Of course! We'll be treated like heroes after last night." I smile and imagine the realms as I had first seen them, beautiful and serene. Not for the first time, I realize how much I miss those days, when I could while away the time with my mother and my friends. _No, Gemma,_ I say to myself, _don't think about that._ _Those days are the past. And you still have a job to do._

"Gemma?" Ann says, and I realize that she's asked me a question.

"What? Oh, I'm sorry, Ann, I was daydreaming."

"That's fine. I said, what happened to Kartik?"

I feel a flush working its way into my cheeks. I turn my face away slightly to hide it from Ann. "He left this morning."

"Oh?" Ann asks, the disbelief plain in her voice. "So he's not coming back?"

"Of course he is! He- he just left the _room_ this morning." I say, completely mortified. "He's staying in the boathouse."

"Ah," I sneak a look at Ann's face. It's a mask of polite interest, though I know she's itching for the details. "I see. So is he planning on coming back to visit tonight?"

I fight back a laugh. Visit, indeed. "I believe so."

Ann coughs lightly. "Well then. I think I will move in to Felicity's room, if you don't mind, Gemma. She's in a bit of a state right now, and you seem to already have a source of…comfort."

I smile politely, though inside I'm euphoric. I could kiss Ann. "That's perfectly fine. Actually, Ann, darling, it's downright noble of you. To put aside your own despair to help a friend. Very commendable."

Ann looks at me, eyebrows raised, and we both double up in slightly frantic laughter. Once we start to regain ourselves, we take one look at each other and lose it again. This goes on for several minutes, until both of us are lying on the ground, clutching our sides and crying with mirth. It's not so much that my comment was that incredibly amusing: it's that we both so desperately needed a good laugh.

"Right," Ann coughs when our hooting laughter dies away to the occasional giggle. "Well, then. I think we should head back to the school."

"Indeed."

We stroll arm-in-arm through the trees, chatting carelessly. When we near the edge of the woods, I stop to fix my hair into a more presentable state. Ann helps me, and soon we manage to trap the disobedient tresses into a slightly messy bun at the nape of my neck. Then we step back out into the weak late afternoon sunlight. I stare around me, wondering where the day has gone.

Ann and I move towards the doors of Spence. When we reach them, a clock in the hall chimes the hour. Seven. It's dinnertime.

"Seven o'clock!" Ann gasps. "We were out there for hours!"

I smile at Ann's surprise. "So it would seem."

Polite chatter wafts out from the dining room. Ann edges closer to the doors.

"I'm famished." she says, her eyes darting between me and the dining room. "Shall we?"

I shake my head. "No, thank you." Ann's face falls. "But you can go on without me. I'm not all that hungry really." The last bit is an atrocious lie. That apple was certainly _not_ enough to tide me over. But I'm eager to get to Kartik, and willing to settle for whatever I can steal from the kitchens if it means that I get to see him earlier.

"If you say so."

I watch Ann's retreating figure for a moment, then dash into the kitchens. As I do my best to charm some food from the tired maids there, I let my mind wander upstairs, to my bedroom. I walk out of the kitchen, calling a quick 'thank you' over my shoulder, and trot quickly to the stairs, eating my measly dinner of roll and fruit quickly. I fear I will die of hunger if I don't eat a full meal soon.

I pass doors on either side of me, but pay them no mind, having eyes only for the ground in front of me. My heart starts beating madly as I round the last corner. I run the last few steps to my door, but stop as I come up to it, resting my hand nervously on the doorknob. In all honesty, I haven't the faintest idea why I am so anxious to just walk in. It's my room, after all, and it's not as if Kartik is a stranger. Far from it. No, I suppose it's simply maidenly shyness, though it is far too late for it. Taking a deep breath, I turn the doorknob and open the door, slipping inside quietly.

At first glance, the room appears empty. The window is closed, just as I had left it this morning. My heart sinks, and I walk morosely to my bed. I suppose I will have to wait a while for him. After a few quiet seconds, I stand and walk over to my mirror. Sitting at the chair, I shake my hair loose from the careless bun and let the curly locks brush against my back. I smile at my reflection and close my eyes, remembering a time when I had sat in this very spot and played wood nymph.

I feel a pair of arms slink themselves around my waist, and my heart stops. Before I can so much as open my eyes, I hear a soft chuckle.

"Got you."

"Kartik!" I cry, turning around in his arms and kissing him. When we separate, I exhale contentedly and snuggle into his hold. "I didn't see you. Where were you all day?"

"The boathouse. Fixing it up a bit." Kartik answers simply. "What did you do?"

"I was in the woods for most of the day. Just walking around." I play with his sleeves again. "Ann found me later."

Kartik is silent. I sense that he knows that I have more news. I'm just reluctant to tell him.

"So how is the boathouse?" I ask lamely in an attempt to get attention away from me.

"Fine." I feel Kartik holding back a laugh. "What did Miss Bradshaw have to say?"

"Oh, this and that," I hedge, then sigh. "Actually, she wanted to tell me her new idea about binding the magic."

"Ah," Kartik says, in a way that tells me nothing about what he's thinking.

"Yes. She thinks I should find a way to bind the magic to the realms rather than the creatures in it, like I had planned. Says it will be a way to include everyone equally and with a smaller chance of civil war. In other words, she wants me to forgo the alliance." I pause to take a breath. "She does have a few solid points, I suppose, but I honestly haven't the faintest idea how I would explain to everyone that I'm not going to have them join in an alliance. The forest folk would take particular offense. I wouldn't live through the meeting."

"You know what I think?" Kartik asks, tightening his hold at my last sentence. "I think you should consider her idea. It does make sense. Everyone would, eventually, be happy. It's most certainly a step in the right direction. But I also think you should take both this option and your alliance idea very seriously. Look at the consequences of both, weigh the good and the bad against each other. Don't make any hasty decisions. You don't know if you can take the magic back."

I nod, grateful to have his input. "I will, I promise."

"That's all I ask of you." Kartik replies, twisting one of my curls between his fingers. I yawn, and he laughs. "Am I boring you, Miss Doyle?"

"No," I do my best to recover, but yawn hugely again. "Despite the late morning, I didn't exactly get a lot of sleep last night."

"You know, I didn't either." He kisses me sweetly. "Must be the weather."

I laugh quietly along with him, then turn to look somewhat longingly at the bed.

"An early night sounds heavenly right about now." Kartik says, and I nod earnestly. We separate, and I notice a small bag nestled behind my screen. I raise my eyebrows.

Kartik shrugs. "I thought I might need some clothes, and I had some stored away in the boathouse, from last time."

"Oh," I can't help but feel reassured that he hadn't gone to the gypsies for clothing, or worse, stolen them from someone. "Alright then." We go about undressing. It feels odd, yet so completely natural to be doing this with Kartik. It's as if we're married, a happy couple able to spend their whole lives together. I smile, thinking of white dresses and henna tattoo, an odd combination, yet, for us, fitting. My heart aches when I think of that. I so desperately want to be his wife, to be Mrs. Gemma-

Gemma what? With a jolt, I realize that I don't know Kartik's last name. I turn to him.

"Kartik?"

"Hmm?"

I pause, unsure how to go on. I decide for the blunt approach. "What's your name? Your full name, I mean."

Kartik turns and blinks at me for a moment, as if wondering where on earth I pulled such a random question from. But then he shrugs, apparently deciding that now was not the time to ponder the strange ways of a woman's brain.

"Ishana. My last name is Ishana."

"Oh," I say lamely. "Alright then."

Kartik shakes his head slightly. "Anything else?"

"No."

I spin away from him and continue changing, and eventually I hear him do the same. Kartik Ishana. It's a beautiful name, and it suits him, somehow. I reach behind me and quickly untie my corset. Kartik stares at me. I stare back. "What?"

He shakes his head. "I'll never be able to undo that so quickly."

"Practice makes perfect," I reply, not realizing the double meaning to my words until they are already said. He raises an eyebrow, and I blush. Turning away, I reach for my nightgown, before realizing that it's at my grandmother's house, along with most of my clothes. I suppose I'll just sleep in my chemise, and borrow something from Ann or Felicity tomorrow.

I crawl into bed and under the covers and wait for Kartik to join me. When he does, I slide into his arms and nestle myself into his frame, tucking my head under his chin. We lay like that, completely at ease, for a while. Eventually, I feel his fingers stop tracing the stitches of my chemise, and I know that he is asleep. After a few moments of listening to his rhythmic breathing, I feel my own eyes drooping. I fall asleep in his arms, feeling more at home there than I have since leaving India.

**Ha, double meanings are fun. Yay, smart Ann! Will Gemma take her advice? Who knows...**

**Please, please, PLEASE review!! It would make my birthday SO much better!! (yay, Saturday!) Especially since I'm spending it at Region Band...yay?**

**Loves her readers, Shes.A.Dreamer**


	4. Chapter 4: Love

**Thanks for the reviews, and the 'Happy Birthday's! Hugs to all of you! Anyway, here's chapter 4!**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray. If I was, would I be posting this on the internet? Didn't think so.**

In the morning, I wake to find Kartik already up, tracing my chemise like he had before falling asleep. I smile drowsily at him.

"Morning," I mumble, still in the land between sleep and consciousness. I stretch my neck for a good morning kiss. He gives it to me, then pulls away to look at my face. For the first time, I notice that he's dressed.

"Good morning," Kartik replies, still staring at me.

"Going somewhere?" I ask in an attempt to break his focus. It works.

"Actually, yes." He admits, slightly shame-facedly. "I'm sorry, Gemma, but I have to go. Soon." He sees the alarm in my eyes. "I'll be back tonight, I promise. There's just…a few things I have to take care of today."

"Alright, then." I can't help but feel put-out. But I'm unwilling to start a fight, so I decide to let it go. "When will you be back?"

"Same time as yesterday." The relief in Kartik's voice is evident when he realizes I won't interrogate him. "Gemma, I'm sorry, really, but-"

"Go," I cut him off, gesturing towards the window. I smile. "But hurry back."

"I will." He kisses me again, gently, as if he will never let go. But he does, regretfully, and stands. "Don't get into any trouble while I'm gone." I nod, and he swings himself out of the window gracefully.

I lean back into my pillow, thinking. It seems that all we do is hide. Hide our relationship, hide who we are. Is this how we will always be? Will there be a last good-bye for me and Kartik?

No, I refuse to let that happen. I need Kartik, and, somehow, I think he needs me, too. The feelings that we have for each other are too strong to be ignored. Hadn't we tried to do just that, and failed? No, we cannot be separated. Just the thought makes my heart plummet. I turn over to lie on my stomach and prop my head up on my hands.

Why is it that the thought of leaving him makes my heart react like this? Why can't I just turn away, claim it was never meant to be? I had had feelings for Simon, and now, I hardly think of him. Why can't I do the same for Kartik? My heart screams the answer at me, but my brain rejects the thought.

_You love him, Gem. Admit it. And he loves you._

But that can't possibly be true. What do I, Gemma Doyle, have to offer someone like him? We're just two people, drawn to each other for some unknown reason. But that reason couldn't be love. Could it?

_No, Gemma,_ the annoying voice in my head chastises. _You can't possibly believe that you-_

_But why not?_ A new, defiant voice asks. _There's absolutely no reason I can't love Kartik!_

_You're two completely different people. Different status, different races._

_So?_

_Be reasonable, Gemma._

No. I'm sick of being reasonable, of bending to the will of society. What has society done for me? It's torn my mother away, made me ashamed of my father, and forced me to hide my love for Kartik, even from myself. I owe nothing to society.

With my new resolution in heart, I stand to get ready for the day. But then I remember my lack of clean clothing. Blast. I reach for my blue cloak and, wrapping it around me, creep to my door, listening for any sounds of movement. There isn't any. Taking a deep breath, I dash out in nothing but my chemise and my cloak. When I reach Fee's room, I'm slightly out of breath. I knock quietly but urgently. A moment later, the door swings open and I sprint inside.

"Gemma!" Ann's voice is surprised. I look around for Fee. She's lying on the bed, looking up at me with half-closed eyes.

"What on earth are you doing in here?" Fee asks groggily.

"I need to borrow some clothes." I say.

"Go away and wear your own." Fee growls and buries herself back under her blanket.

"I would if I could." I retort. "Most of my clothes are at my grandmother's house."

Felicity sighs dramatically and throws away her covers. I smile angelically. She scowls.

"Ann, could you grab a corset for her?" Felicity asks, and Ann scampers away. "I don't know if I'll be able to find something long enough. You're a bit taller than me."

I sigh. "That's alright, Fee. I just need something for today. Actually, I'm not sure how long it will take for Tom to realize that I need clothes. I'll send a letter home tonight."

Fee mutters to herself as Ann comes back into view, corset in hand. _"_Ah, _merci,_ Ann."

In next to no time, Fee has me dressed and ready. She's lent me a pretty green dress that is too long for her, and that matches my eyes. The bodice is a little snug, but I still have room enough to breathe. I sneak a glance at myself in the mirror, and find that I like what I see.

"There!" Fee exclaims finally, stepping away from me. "_Très magnifique!_ At least, as close to it as I'll ever get you to look." She grins crookedly. I frown at her.

"Is anyone else hungry?" Ann asks from behind Felicity.

"I'm starving." I reply, following her out of the room. Fee trails behind, and I watch her out of the corner of my eye. It's the first time I have seen her since returning from the realms. On the surface, she's the same girl as always, head held high and back stick-straight. But I know her better. I can see the anguish hidden in her eyes, the strain held in her tense muscles. My heart goes out to her, knowing the cause of her pain. I, too, feel the loss of Pip, but nowhere near as much as Fee does.

"If you keep eating, Gemma, you won't fit into your gown for your debut." Felicity pipes up. "And you, Ann. An actress can't be all flesh."

"I'm only one of the maidens. It hardly makes me an full actress." Ann says sadly.

"Nonsense." Fee speeds ahead of us, calling sweetly over her shoulder. "You were born for the stage, Annie. Don't let your doubts convince you otherwise."

"Do you think she's right?" Ann asks as Felicity disappears into the dining room. "Do you think I could make it as an actress?"

"Of course. You practically made that composer fall in love with you, Ann. Not all actresses can be Nan Washbrads. The theatre could use a taste of Ann Bradshaw." Ann beams at me.

* * *

After we've eaten, Fee leads Ann and me into the hall. Just as we are about to step outside, Mrs. Nightwing appears. 

"Good morning, ladies." She calls, stopping us in our tracks. Before we can respond, she continues. "Miss Doyle, a package has arrived for you. From your brother. It seems that, in your haste to return to us here at Spence, you left several belongings behind. I'll have one of the maids bring them up shortly." Mrs. Nightwing nods in the direction of the door. I look and see my trunk sitting there. "He says to tell you that your father is recovering, and that, in due course, he will be moved back to India, at his request."

I'm surprised. "When will he leave?"

"Not until sometime after your debut, I believe."

"Oh. Thank you, Mrs. Nightwing." I turn and head back for the doors, Felicity and Ann scrambling to keep up as we streak past the new crew working on the East Wing.

So Father is returning to India. Something about that makes me uneasy. It's not that I don't want him to return; Father had loved India. It's the fact that Tom is allowing him to go that doesn't sit well with me.

"Cheer up, Gemma!" Fee says when she catches up with me. "It's too beautiful a day to be upset!"

I say nothing, knowing it's pointless to argue. Already, Fee's exuberance is creeping into me, and I can feel it replacing my anxiety bit by bit. I smile weakly.

"What shall we do today?" Ann asks.

Felicity grins and runs away, yelling over her shoulder, "Catch me if you can!"

* * *

"Gemma, you look like a sprite." Fee declares several hours later, when she finally tires and flops down on a bench. 

"Thank you, I think." I sit down next to her. Throughout the day, Felicity had insisted on playing all sorts of games, from tag to hide-and-seek. My hair hadn't lasted an hour.

"It's got to be close to dinner time." Ann complains from Fee's other side as she tries to fix her own hair. Felicity and I leave ours as it is. "We've been out here long enough."

It's true. Between the games, Fee had talked nonstop, though, noticeably, she'd avoided the topic of the realms, for which I was glad. I still hadn't come to a decision about the magic.

"I think you're right, Ann." Fee replies as a horde of younger girls stampede into view, each one trying to be the first to enter the dining hall. Felicity rises gracefully and glides towards Spence, leaving me and Ann to follow. Dinner is a complete bore. Mrs. Nightwing titers over my and Felicity's loose hair. Elizabeth, Cecily, and Martha sit near us, gossiping nonstop and throwing nasty looks my way. I ignore them, instead choosing to focus on my sordid dinner, willing the time to go faster so that I might meet Kartik in my room. After my revelation this morning, I am more eager than ever to see him.

Dinner finally ends, and I walk hurriedly out of the room. Fee and Ann seem to drag their feet, and look amused at my rush to get upstairs.

"Tell Kartik we said hello!" Felicity taunts when, at last, we reach my door. I grimace at her, and she smirks back. Then she turns and saunters off with Ann, leaving me alone.

I place my hand on the doorknob and open it, sliding inside quietly. Kartik is there, leaning against the wall near my window. He smiles at me, and I dash across the room into his waiting arms.

"Hello," Kartik breathes into my hair, and I shudder happily. He pulls away slightly, looking at my face. "Come, sit with me." He whispers, pulling me down to lie next to him on the bed. I curl up beside him, fitting my head under his chin, and listen to the sound of his heart beating.

Kartik takes a deep breath as if to speak, but stays silent. I move my head to lie next to his on the pillow.

"Yes?" I prompt, kissing him lightly. Kartik groans.

"You make it so hard to concentrate." He says, pulling me even closer. I giggle, and wait for him to continue. He doesn't.

"I was thinking about you this morning." I state, as a way to pass the time.

"And what were you thinking?" Kartik asks.

"It was…well, it was more about us than you, really. And more about society than us." I'm babbling, and I know Kartik notices.

"Really?" He says, and I hear curiosity in his voice.

"Yes." I swallow. "It was an… interesting revelation."

Kartik is silent for a moment. "Gemma," His voice has changed, and I hear distress in it. "I know we're not exactly the kind of couple society dictates we should be. I- I understand if you want to-"

"No!" I nearly shout, clutching his arm. "That's not what I meant at all!"

"Then what did you mean, Gemma?" Kartik sounds confused now.

I'm silent, trying to put my true feelings into words.

"Exactly," Kartik says sadly when I don't go on. "Our relationship will ruin you. I don't want to do that to you. I won't."

"No!" I'm nearly shouting again. "Kartik, please, listen. You're right, I _was_ thinking about all this, about how we shouldn't be together, according to society. I thought that one day, in the future, we would move apart." Kartik stiffens, and I look at him pleadingly. "No, wait! I was thinking about it, yes, but…I couldn't really consider it. It hurt too much to imagine life without you. I don't _want_ life without you!"

Kartik looks at me, defeated. He reaches up and brushes a lone tear from my cheek.

"I don't care what society thinks." I go on, sitting up and pulling him with me. I crawl into Kartik's lap and he wraps me in his arms. "You and me, together- _that's_ what I care about." I feel more tears start falling. "I want to live with you, be with you. Kartik-" I take a deep breath. "Kartik, I love you. No matter what people say."

I'm silent now, tears streaming down my face. Kartik stares at me, reading the unconcealed emotion on my face. I see the conflict in his eyes, and hate myself for causing it. But then he leans forward, brushing his lips against my cheeks, drying the rest of my tears. He bring me closer, and then he's cradling me, my head pressed gently against his shoulder, one of his hands wrapped soothingly around me, the other stroking my face.

"Gemma," Kartik whispers. "Gemma… I want to be with you, so badly. But I also want what's best for you, what will make you happy. If that means that we're together, then so much the better for us." He looks into my eyes again. "And—I love you, too."

I smile weakly through my tears. "No matter what society thinks?"

He laughs. "No matter what _anyone_ thinks."

"Good." I sit up, wrapping my arms around his neck, and kiss him. His arms flex, tightening their hold on me, and he kisses me back. When we pull apart, he leans his forehead against mine, and whispers my name.

"I love you." I remind him, stroking his lips with the tip of my finger.

"I love you, too." Kartik looks at me, then down at my hand, now held in his. He stands.

"Where are you going?" I ask, surprised. He's still gripping my hand.

"Nowhere." Kartik pulls me to face him and my legs swing to the floor. He lifts a hand and strokes my face with his thumb gently, lovingly. "Gemma, are you sure you want me?"

"Yes." I answer. My stomach turns nervously.

Kartik nods, still looking at me, a strange look in his eyes. "And you want to be with me for the rest of your life, to live with the consequences?" I nod, unsure of what he's really asking me. He breathes deeply. "Well, then."

Kartik reaches into his pocket silently. He brings his hand out, and in it is a small black box. My lungs stop working. I look at him, shocked, terrified, and ecstatic, all at once.

"Gemma," Kartik starts, kneeling down so that his face is level with mine. His bore into mine, screaming his feelings at me. My lungs shudder back into life, and my heart leaps into a frenzied pace. He lets go of my hands and opens the box. Inside is a beautiful ring, an oval diamond, framed by two smaller, circular ones, set in a thin silver band. It's perfect. "I love you. I want to be with you, forever, no matter what. Will you marry me?"

My right hand flies to my mouth; my left is held in his. I stare mutely at the pretty little ring, in shock. I try to speak, but fail. Instead, I let my eyes travel up his arm and into his eyes. His usual walls are down. His long-lashed eyes plead silently with me, filling me with warmth. A smile spreads across my face under trembling fingers.

"Yes," I whisper. Kartik beams and slides the ring onto my finger. A giggle escapes me as I lift up my hand to admire it in the fast-fading light. Kartik stands and wraps me warmly into his strong embrace, holding me close to his chest. I raise my arms to drape them around his shoulders and press my lips to his. We stand like that for several minutes, and when we break apart, he takes my hand and kisses the ring on it. He looks up at me.

"So, do you like it?"

"It's wonderful!" I say, thrilled, wiggling my ring finger. "When did you get it?"

"I've always had it." I stare at him, surprised. "It was my grandmother's. It's one of the few personal possessions I've kept from India."

His grandmother. Part of my future family. A family I will probably never know.

"Gemma," Kartik says, smiling. "my fiancé. I could get used to that."

"I could, too." I stand on my toes and kiss his neck affectionately. Kartik holds me close again, lifts my face to his, and presses his lips to mine. My mind is emptied of everything but his kiss. I lose myself in the sensation of his lips moving with mine, loving the feel of him under my hands.

"Gemma," Kartik whispers again, his fingers tracing a line down my spine. I close my eyes and lean into his touch. His hands work their way back up, then come back down, unbuttoning my dress as they do. Kartik pulls the dress over my head, putting it to the side. He moves to my corset, fingers fumbling with the laces, but I can't help him; I'm too busy unbuttoning his shirt.

Kartik manages to finish on my corset, and I sigh in relief when he tugs it off, but my sigh turns into a gasp as he traces kisses down my front, his hands resting on my sides. His face comes back to be level with mine, and I push him gently onto the bed.

He falls back lightly, and I climb over to him, straddling my legs around his hips, my chemise rising above my knees. Kartik runs his hands up my leg, from my ankle to my hip. I bend over him to kiss his neck, and his hold on my waist under the chemise tightens. He groans as I open my lips, nipping his neck playfully, but I pay him no mind. Instead, I reach for his trousers, loosening them, and throw them away to join my dress and corset.

Sitting up, I seize the hem of my chemise and pull it over my head, exposing my bare skin. Kartik's hands leave my waist, rise up my sides, and come to rest at my breasts. I lean over him again, trailing my lips over the lines of his torso. He moans, and my lips travel upwards to find his. I kiss him eagerly, twining my hands in his hair, welding my body to his. He shifts so that he is over me now, and moves his hands to trace my curves.

"Kartik," I pant through his lips, shivering from the warmth of his touch. He removes his mouth from mine and kisses my temple softly. I breathe shakily, clutching him.

"I love you, Gemma," He whispers into my ear. I stroke his face with my finger, my mouth being engaged at his neck. Kartik moans softly, pressing me into him. I move so that my legs straddle his hips again, and he groans.

We're a blur of love and passion, sighs and murmurs. I want nothing more than to please him, to be a part of him. I thrive on the feel of his skin on mine, and take pleasure from his every whispered word, every muffled moan. It's bliss to be here, in the arms of the man I will spend the rest of my life with.

* * *

Later, Kartik and I lie together, legs entwined and hands held fast. Our bodies are slick with perspiration. My head rests on his chest. 

"You're family's not going to be very happy with me." Kartik says, toying with my hair.

"Father likes you, and Tom accepts you now." I reply. "We'll deal with Grandmama when the time comes."

"What about your debut? And your season?"

"I'll make my debut, then sit out on my season. I don't need one."

"And your family will let you do that?" Kartik's voice is disbelieving.

"Father and Tom will." I kiss his neck. "Kartik, I fully intend to marry you, with or without my grandmother's blessing. If she protests, then we'll go to India. She can either help me plan the wedding or cause me to become a scandal."

"You're sure this is what you want?" Kartik still sounds uncertain.

"Very," I reply. "It will all work out in the end."

I feel Kartik nod. "Alright, then. Debut, then wedding. That's a lot of planning."

"Oh, you have no idea." I laugh. Already, I feel a thrill of excitement at the thought of planning my wedding, with Kartik, Fee, and Ann at my side. I know that I will have to deal with Grandmama sooner or later. She won't be pleased, but I know that she'll eventually relent, if only so that I'm not a black mark on the Doyle family name. I laugh quietly into Kartik's chest. "I love you, Kartik."

He kisses my head softly. "I love you, too, Gemma."

**Okay, I am so, so sorry if you think this chapter is cheeeesy. But it was always in my plotline, so I'm sorry. I tried to put it off to a later chapter, but it didn't work. I promise it won't make the story all gross and lovey-dovey.**

**And on the comment from last chapter about Fee...I delayed putting her in because when Fee's around, she's far from silent I wanted to give Ann a chance to talk, so Fee was moping in her room.**

**Mmmmkay. I'm done with this one. Review pleeeease? Even if you just tell me how much the proposal sucked...**

**Hopes her readers don't hate her,**

** Shes.A.Dreamer**


	5. Chapter 5: England

**Thanks for the reviews! And for boosting my confidence about the cheesiness of the proposal. Even though I know you're all lying to me. HA But, it made me feel good anyway, so as a reward...CHAPTER 5!**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray. I'm not even Shes.A.Dreamer. Nope, I'm a sad little nerd who sits at home and writes all day, wishing she had one measly fraction of Libba Bray's writing skills...but I digress.**

I wake up early the next morning. I can feel Kartik breathing sleepily on the back of my neck, sending goosebumbs surging down my back. Last night seems like a dream; a very happy, glorious dream. I look down at my hands, half-expecting them to be bare. But my ring is still there, glittering brightly in the early morning light. So I hadn't imagined it. I really am engaged to Kartik. The thought makes my heart swell. I want to shout, to tell everyone. But I can't. No, I must keep quiet about this, wait until after my debut. Only Ann and Felicity can know. I don't have a hope of hiding this from them, so I might as well tell them now.

I fiddle with my ring, trying to decide how to tell my friends my news. In earlier times, I might have taken them to the realms, but somehow, I don't think we're ready to return. We could go out to the lake. No one would overhear us there, and we wouldn't be missed until vespers. Kartik could even be there with us. Yes, I'll bring them to the pond, this afternoon.

Kartik stirs next to me. I turn around to face him, admiring his dark good looks. I still have a hard time believing that he's mine, but the ring on my finger doesn't lie. For some reason, he wants me, and not anyone else. I run my finger gently over Kartik's shoulder, tracing his outline, as I so often do. His mouth twitches upward, as if he's smiling, but he sleeps on. I lie there, my eyes flicking from his beautiful face to the engagement ring, and wait patiently for him to wake up.

When he does, his eyes open slowly, blinking blearily. I smile at him.

"Good morning."

Kartik smiles back in response, grabbing my hand and lifting it to his face. He kisses my palm gently. "Good morning."

I tuck my face into his chest. "Kartik, you didn't plan to do anything today, did you?"

"No, why?"

"I was planning on telling Felicity and Ann about our engagement. And I want you there with me when I do." Kartik chuckles. I look at him. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing." He replies. "I should have known you would want to tell them. When and where are you planning on doing this?"

"After lunch, at the boathouse."

"I'll be there."

* * *

At breakfast, I hurry into the dining room, looking for Ann and Felicity. They are huddled at the end of the table, talking. I rush over to them. 

"Good morning," Ann says pleasantly when I take my seat across from her. Felicity barely looks up from her breakfast.

"Hello," I return, feeling slightly nervous. Even though my ring is safely hanging from a chain and tucked into my bodice, I feel as though it is visible to everyone.

"Aren't we a little jumpy?" Felicity says, looking at me curiously. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I look around to make sure there's no one within hearing distance. I lean towards them. "Come to the pond with me after lunch."

Ann nods subtly, but Felicity's curiosity is unconcealed in her eyes.

"And why should I?" she asks, turning her head away slightly.

"I have a story that you might find quite interesting." I say, and Fee sighs. I turn to the food, knowing that Felicity will be there this afternoon.

The rest of the morning seems to drag by. I fidget when I sit, pace when I stand, and jump every time someone addresses me. Felicity dedicates her time to pestering me about what news I have for them, but I ignore her, to her intense annoyance. Ann does her best to hide her interest, but I can see it in the way she looks up expectantly whenever Fee tries to coax my secret out.

Finally, lunch arrives. I fly through my meal, eager yet terrified to get to the lake. Felicity bides her time, frustrated with me as she is. Ann acts as if nothing is amiss, displaying her considerable acting talents. I do my best to imitate her, but my attempt at nonchalance poorly pays off.

"Miss Doyle!" Mrs. Nightwing chastises me. "Ladies do not race to finish eating like horses at the track. Do take your time."

"Yes, Mrs. Nightwing." I say, the very picture of ladylike behavior. Felicity snorts discreetly into her food.

At last, Felicity finishes eating. I stand and all but gallop from the table, Ann and Felicity following close. I push open the doors to the vast lawn and make my way to the pond, ignoring the worker's stares. Behind me, I hear Felicity complaining about the pace, but I ignore her. By the time we reach the woods, Fee is positively fuming.

"Gemma Doyle, if you don't tell me why you are dragging us about the yard _this instant_ I am turning around and not coming back. Just see if I don't! Gemma!"

I exhale slowly, turning to face her. "I will tell you when we reach the pond. It's not far now."

"I know where the pond is, thank you!" Felicity huffs, striding away angrily.

"Don't mind her." Ann says. "You know as well as I do that she's just upset."

"I know." I watch Felicity's figure weave its way through the trees. "Come on, then."

We traipse on through the woods, my heart beating faster with every step. In just a few short moments, Felicity and Ann will know my secret. The ring hanging around my neck presses into my skin, and I wish I could have it on my finger for everyone to see. Ann and I step forward into the clearing around the pond. Felicity is standing at the water's edge, hands on hips and lips pursed.

"We're here." She says pointedly. "So get telling."

"Right." I look around. Where is Kartik? "I think you should sit."

"Where? On the ground? I think not. My dress will be ruined."

Before I can respond, Kartik emerges from the boathouse. Felicity and Ann gasp, but my heart leaps.

"What are you doing here?" Felicity hisses, eyeing him. "You could get us in trouble."

"I asked him to come." I tell Fee as Kartik walks to my side. "It is his news, as well."

Ann's eyes widen slightly, looking at me and Kartik in surprised delight. Felicity, completely oblivious, grumbles to herself and carefully sits on a tree trunk. I take a deep breath, steadying myself, and Kartik squeezes my hand in encouragement. I try to talk, but nothing comes out. A wave of terror washes over me. I have no idea how to tell them.

"What is it, Gemma?" Felicity sees my fear; she looks concerned.

"Fee…Ann…" I say shakily. Kartik stands beside me, motionless, my silent supporter. I try again. "Kartik and I…well, we've been through a lot. Even though we've only known each other for a year. He's been there for me recently, and I for him." I'm babbling again. Ann's eyes are wide still, her hand over her mouth. Fee eyes me suspiciously. "But we've decided to— to—"

I stop, unable to go on, and look at Kartik pleadingly. He smiles softly at me.

"Gemma and I are going to be married."

For one long, agonizing moment, everything is silent. Even the relentless hammering from the East Wing is hushed. I hold my breath as my friends take in my news and mentally count the passing seconds. Then, Fee stands and runs towards me and Kartik, throwing her arms around me. I blink, surprised. This is not the reaction I had expected.

"Gemma," Felicity says. "why didn't you tell me before? I can't believe it, you're getting married! _Married!_" She shakes her head in disbelief, and looks at my left hand, searching for my ring. I giggle. "Well, where is it?"

I pull the chain out of my bodice. Felicity grabs it eagerly, and I slide the chain over my head. Ann rushes over to us, eyes shining.

"Oh! It's so pretty!" Ann says, looking over Fee's shoulder. I smile gratefully.

Kartik lifts his arms around my shoulders, and kisses my temple softly. My smile spreads even wider. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

"Not at all." I lean into him, watching Felicity and Ann admire ring.

"I'm so excited for you, Gemma!" Ann sighs, fingering the unconventional diamonds. "Can we help plan the wedding? Please?"

"Yes, can we, Gemma?" Fee begs, sticking out her lower lip. Ann copies her, and I'm reminded forcefully of one of our first trips to the realms.

"Can they?" I ask Kartik, shoving the spotlight onto him. He looks frightened as Felicity and Ann turn to him.

"I—you—they're your friends." He stutters, plainly afraid to answer.

"Of course you can help!" I laugh. For all his bravery in the realms, Kartik couldn't even handle two excited schoolgirls. Fee and Ann clap their hands, delighted. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Thank you, Gemma!" Fee screeches, bouncing up and down like a child. "I can't believe it! We can start as soon as we get back to Spence! Oh, I can't wait to see the look on Elizabeth's face!"

"No!" I say, shaking my head. Kartik stiffens next to me. "You can't tell Elizabeth!"

"Why not?" Felicity looks disappointed. "Come on, Gemma. She would be positively _green_ with envy. It will be so much fun!"

"Tempting." I reply sadly, and Kartik sniggers. "But no. You can't tell anyone until after I've made my debut. Not a single soul. Please, Felicity? We can still plan, just not out in the open."

"Fine." Felicity pouts as Ann hands me my ring. "I won't tell. But as soon as you've made your debut, we're going wedding crazy."

"I can hardly wait."

"Oh, Gemma, this will be so much fun!" Ann's enthusiasm can't be held back. "You'll be getting married, and I'll be on stage…"

"You'll come back for the wedding, though, right?" I ask, smiling at Ann's obvious excitement.

"Of course! I'll have to stay in London for a bit, but I'll come help soon." Ann says happily. "Did I tell you? I sent a letter to my cousins yesterday, telling them not to expect me. They won't be pleased, but I'll pay them back for my education, eventually."

"That's fantastic, Ann!" I say. She is finally taking control of her life, and I couldn't be happier for her.

"Congratulations." Kartik says quietly. Ann smiles shyly at him.

"Thank you." Ann looks at us, an eager gleam in her eye. "Will you come see me on stage?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world." I walk forward and kiss her on the cheek. "Just imagine. I'll be able to say that my friend from finishing school is a famous actress."

Ann blushes. "I'm only going to be a merry maiden. There are other girls in it, too."

"True." I agree. "But all great actresses have to start somewhere."

The three of us- Felicity, Ann, and I- sit on the bank of the pond and talk, discussing our lives after Spence. Kartik sits with us, but, for the most part, he is silent, listening to our plans and toying with my hands. Fee goes on about moving to Paris, where she can be with other degenerates, like her. I see Kartik's surprise when he hears of Fee's preference for woman, and I know he is thinking of Ithal. Ann is to be living in London, so she can perform at the Gaiety with the rest of the cast of _The Merry Maidens_. Both of them are truly elated with the way their lives are turning out, and I find I can't complain about my own, either.

"Where will you two live?" Ann asks Kartik and me timidly after Fee's long narrative about Parisian homes. "Will you go back to India?"

I look at Kartik. We hadn't discussed this yet, hadn't discussed anything, really. Up until now, we had only worried about telling my family. Well, that and the realms, but that's a different story entirely.

"I think that for now, we can stay in England." Kartik says for me after a moment. "Get used to married life. As for India…it is a distant possibility." I nod. It is a perfect plan, one that gives my family more than enough time to accept Kartik as my husband.

"How lucky you are, Gemma." Felicity sighs. "You already know who you're going to spend the rest of your life with."

Our group falls silent. Fee's head is down, but I can see a single tear sliding down her cheek. My heart aches for her. How awful she must be feeling, having lost Pippa only days ago, and now watching her friends plan their ideal career, their dream marriages. I feel absolutely horrible, imagining her in a few short weeks, living alone in Paris, trying to understand and accept who she is. Mourning the loss of Pippa. I stretch my hand out towards her, holding her hand.

"Fee," I murmur. "You'll find someone. I know it. Who couldn't love you?"

She looks up at me, smiling sadly. "Thanks, Gemma."

After a few silent seconds, Ann strikes up a conversation about Paris again, distracting Felicity from her gloom. I lean into Kartik's arms with a sigh. He squeezes my shoulders gently, lacing our fingers together. I twirl my ring between my fingers idly, watching the sun glint off the shiny surface. My joy about my and Kartik's engagement and Ann's role in the _The Merry Maidens_ is not enough to completely eclipse Felicity's dejection. I can feel Kartik's concerned eyes on my face.

"I think we should be going." Felicity says suddenly. "Before Mrs. Nightwing sends a search party after us."

I nod, stuffing my ring and its chain into my bodice again. Ann scrambles to her feet, and Kartik helps me to mine. I start to lean towards him, but stop, feeling Felicity's intent eyes on me. I sigh and straighten again, resisting the urge to kiss Kartik's perfect lips.

"I'll see you tonight." I say, stepping away grudgingly.

"Right after dinner." He promises, squeezing my hands before letting go.

"Come, Gemma!" Felicity calls jokingly over her shoulder. "We don't want to worry Mrs. Nightwing!"

I grumble under my breath, but walk towards her anyway, turning to wave Kartik. He's already at the door to the boathouse, watching me leave. He returns my wave, then backs into the room. I run to catch up with Felicity and Ann.

"So." Fee starts, and I groan inwardly. "Marriage. That's a big commitment."

"Yes." I answer cautiously.

"It's a _brilliant_ commitment!" Ann gushes. I laugh.

"Even so, it's not something to be taken lightly. Why _exactly_ are you going through with this?" Felicity asks. I look at her, confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Come now, Gemma." Felicity mocks. "Don't think I didn't notice that Ann is no longer your roommate. I'm not completely stupid, my dear."

"Felicity Worthington!" I hiss, realizing what she means. "Keep your voice down! Someone might hear you."

"Oh, fine then." Fee exclaims dramatically. She senses a confession, and she won't let it go until she's satisfied. "But it's not _my_ fault you've lost your virtue."

"Fee!"

"What?"

"Keep. Your. Voice. _Down_." I stop walking, furious. Ann stands awkwardly next to me, and I know she wants nothing more than to disappear.

Felicity stops a few feet in front of me. "So why _are_ you getting married?" Her eyes widen wide. "You're not pregnant, are you?"

"Fee, no! And stop asking me questions!"

"Come on, Gemma!" Felicity pleads. "Give me _some_ details! Please?"

I sigh, closing my eyes in defeat. Felicity smells victory.

"Thank you, Gemma." She says sweetly, smiling brightly at me. Ann coughs, embarrassed, but I can see curiosity in her eyes, as well.

"Oh, get on with it. What do you want to know?" I ask sulkily, feeling very sorry for myself indeed.

Fee steps towards me. "How did it feel? Like you had lost part of you?"

I lean wearily against a tree. How do I explain it?

"No, nothing like that at all. More like…like I had found something I'd been looking for for a long time." I say, cheeks flaming. "It's hard to describe, really. And that's just how it felt for _me_. Because Kartik's like that other missing part of me. _That's_ why I'm marrying him." I'm silent again, embarrassed. I hadn't meant to tell them that much, or seem so philosophical. But that's how it had come out. Ann looks thoughtful. Fee looks dissatisfied.

"That's _it?_" she asks. "You're not going to say anything else?"

"Well," I reply, and Fee leans in eagerly. "I will tell you that our mothers were wrong. England is the _last_ thing you think about."

**Tehehe Gemma made a funny (in case you didn't get it, Gemma was referring to the 'lying back and thinking of England' bit from AGATB). I know it was lame. But funny. To me, anyway.**

**Alright,so I just got over Grease auditions at my school. shudder I'm in the chorus. Yayyyy. Not. Help me feel better? Because...the better I feel the better the chapter. So there!**

**Is dreading researching Victorian/Indian wedding traditions,**

**Shes.A.Dreamer**


	6. Chapter 6: Message

**Thanks for all of the reviews, guys! I seriously wish I could send you all hugs, kisses, and big, fat boxes of chocolate. But that would be stalkerish. So I'm not going to. Instead, I'm going to give you a new chapter! Yay, gifts!**

**Disclaimer: I like books. So does Libba Bray. But, that does not make me her, and, unfortunately, I do not own these characters. I only wish I did.**

The next few days at Spence are a flurry of activity. As we older girls prepare ourselves to make our debuts, Mademoiselle LeFarge readies herself for her wedding, positively radiant with happiness. I can't help but feel a twinge of jealousy when I see her, being able to parade about with her ring in the open and her plans known to everyone. Even so, I find that I am happy for her and Inspector Kent.

"I heard that Mademoiselle LeFarge is planning on having jugglers and mummers at her wedding!" Felicity squeaks one day in her newly renovated tent. I force myself not to roll my eyes, knowing perfectly well that Mademoiselle LeFarge only wants a simple ceremony.

"I wouldn't believe everything you hear, Fee."

"Yes, well, I still think it's a marvelous idea for a wedding." Felicity looks shrewdly at me. "Don't you, Gemma?"

"No," I answer. For days, Felicity has been asking me wedding questions under the cover of Mademoiselle LeFarge's own nuptials, as a way of secretly planning. So far, I haven't given her much to work with, being preoccupied with keeping my engagement a secret. "Jugglers and mummers are a bit much for a wedding. Best keep it simple."

"Simple?" Fee scoffs. "Simple is hardly fashionable, Gemma."

"According to who?" I return. "Society? In case you haven't noticed, Fee, I don't exactly adhere to society's guidelines anymore."

"I think simple weddings are lovely." Ann says. "They focus more on the couple."

"Yes, I know that!" Felicity snaps. "But I think _Mademoiselle LeFarge_ should watch her step and make sure she keeps her family happy."

I make a face at her. "Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding plans are between her and Inspector Kent. Not their families."

"Gemma," Fee whispers, dropping the charade completely. "I understand you don't want a big wedding. But you can't make plans without your family's input. Especially when you look at your choice for a fiancé."

I glare at her, resenting her comment about Kartik, though I know it is nothing more than frustration. My less-than-warm reaction to her endless questioning did nothing to stem her enthusiasm. It only seemed to fuel it, so that she started making outrageous suggestions, such as moving the whole ceremony to a boat that would sail around the English Channel.

"Fee, once Grandmama decides to let us marry, she will want to keep us out of the public eye, no matter how accepting she'll pretend to be." I say wearily. "As long as we have a ceremony, she'll be happy."

"Fine." Felicity huffs. The tent grows quiet, the only sound coming from the girls outside it. Ann keeps her head down, focusing on the handkerchief she's embroidering. Felicity stares icily away from me, and I sit in my chair, daydreaming.

For several minutes, none of us speak. I am perfectly content to sit and think, and I know Ann is focused on her embroidery. But Fee's silence concerns me. She never keeps quiet for so long, not unless she has something on her mind. I sneak a look at her through my eyelashes. Her brow is furrowed, her eyes distant. Curiosity rears its ugly head.

"Fee?" I ask hesitantly. "Are you alright? Is something wrong?"

Felicity starts as though I've frightened her. "Did you say something, Gemma?"

"Yes. I said, is something wrong?"

She shakes her head. "No, no. Not _wrong_, really. I was just wondering…"

"Wondering what?" I prompt sourly. I know she's being evasive on purpose, and I can't help but feel a twinge of annoyance with her for it.

"Well," Felicity says. "I was wondering when you were going to return to the realms."

I'm surprised. "I…hadn't made any plans to, not really." Felicity raises her eyebrows. "Not soon, I mean. I will, eventually."

"Gemma," Felicity sighs. "you can't avoid it forever. The magic, and the realms, is your responsibility. You can't leave the creatures without the magic, especially not when they're repairing the realms after the—the fight." She falters at the end.

"I know, I know!" I groan. "I will return to the realms. I realize I have to bind the magic, somehow. But how can I do it if I don't know how?"

"Talk to the creatures." Ann suggests quietly from her corner. "They might be able to help."

"No, they wouldn't. All they're interested in is the magic, not sharing it." I reply.

"You don't know that." Ann speaks again. "After the fight, they were all helping each other. Not just within their own groups. Asha was taking care of Philon, Bessie and Gorgon were watching the Winterlands creatures with centaurs." She pauses, looking thoughtful. "You know, I think that they just didn't have a chance to get along before. Now, you're giving them that chance, and honestly, I believe they will take it. The realms have been damaged by their fighting too often in the past."

I open my mouth to respond, but can't. I had seen them in the realms myself.

"That's lovely and all that," Felicity responds. "but what about the Winterland creatures? They aren't going to be able to join up so easily with everyone else. What are we going to do about them?"

"Ann did have an idea." I say. "And I think it will work."

"What?" Felicity glowers at Ann and me. "When did this happen?"

"The day after the fight." I glance at Fee. "You were a bit preoccupied."

A flicker of grief flares in Felicity's eyes. "Oh. Well…what was the idea?"

"I think she should bind the magic to the realms, not the creatures." Ann supplies. "That way, everyone gets an equal share, and every tribe is included. It's a more…thorough plan than the alliance."

Felicity is silent for a moment, thinking it over. "It could work. But how would you do it? And would the creatures let you?"

"That's the thing." I answer sadly. "I don't know. I don't know how to do it, I don't know how to tell them. I don't know anything!"

"Gemma, we'll figure out something." Felicity says resolutely. She takes a deep breath. "Okay. What did the Rakshana tell you to say, when you were looking for the Temple?"

"'I bind the magic in the name of the Eastern Star.'"

"So, maybe all you have to do is twist that around, make it work so that the magic goes to the realms." Felicity muses. "That shouldn't be too hard."

"Maybe not. But before I can do that, I have to actually explain this to the creatures."

"Have a meeting between all the groups." Ann proposes, glancing up from her needlework. "Send word around the realms. You can have every group have at least one representative." Felicity nods enthusiastically.

"It is a good idea." I agree. "I just have to come up with what to say."

"You'll be fine." Ann murmurs, returning to her embroidery. "Don't forget, you are the one with the magic on your side. Not them."

"Alright." I peek outside the scarves, looking for nearby ears. No one is around. "Meet me in my room, tonight, the usual time. We'll go to the realms, and send Gorgon to tell Philon and Asha. They can be our messengers." I see Fee's unease in her fidgeting hands. "I know, it's soon, but we don't have a choice. We only have a few days left together at Spence. We won't stay long, I promise." Felicity hesitates, then nods. I stand.

"I think I'm going to turn in early." I say loudly, walking out of the tent. "My head is aching a bit."

I march briskly upstairs to my room. If I'm going into the realms tonight, I'll need Kartik with me.

* * *

Several hours later, Kartik and I sit up together, waiting. He had listened to my plan wordlessly, and quickly agreed to accompany me to the realms. Now, all we have to do is wait for Felicity and Ann.

As if on cue, a quiet knock echoes through the room. I stand quickly and race to the door, pulling it open to let Fee and Ann come inside. They stand in the middle of the room. Fee's eyes are dead, devoid of even a flicker of emotion. Ann simply looks nervous. I share a glance with Kartik from his position against the wall.

"Are you ready?" I ask them. Ann and Kartik nod, but Fee stays motionless. I feel on edge, unaccustomed to this new, empty Felicity. "Alright, then. Clasp hands." My stomach flutters nervously. I close my eyes, blocking out all thoughts but that of the door of light. A warm tingling sweeps through my body, and I open my eyes again to come face-to-face with the door of light. I let my eyes adjust to the sudden brightness, and then push my way into the garden.

As usual, the splendor of the realms stuns me. But this time, the beauty is marred by scars of battle that have yet to be fixed. Several plants lie dead on the ground, and in the distance, I see the remnants of the burned forest. Even so, I can see the results of the creature's hard work in restoring their home.

Felicity and Ann walk ahead of me, staring mutely around them. Kartik stays with me, keeping a protective eye out. It is a strange feeling, being here again. I don't know whether to run screaming or jump for joy. I settle for walking behind my friends quietly as we make our way through the garden to the river.

"Do you see Gorgon?" I ask, looking around for any sign of her.

"No." Ann replies. "Maybe we should- oh! Look, there!"

I look where Ann is pointing to see the boat floating towards us, with Gorgon steering. It is a bizarre sight to see her free of her imprisonment, but I wave her over anyway.

"Most High," Gorgon calls, bowing, when she is within hearing distance. "welcome back."

"Thank you." I gesture around me. "I see you have been busy in my absence."

"Yes, we have. But this is nothing. Come." Gorgon nods towards her drawn plank. "I can show you the rest."

I'm tempted, but hesitant, remembering my promise to Fee. "I would, Gorgon, but-"

"It's alright, Gemma." Felicity says quietly from behind me. "I can stay here. You go. You should see the realms." Ann nods in agreement.

I smile at them, then look to Kartik questioningly. He returns my look with one that plainly says that he's not leaving me alone. Gorgon waits wordlessly. I walk over to the plank, stepping carefully onto the boat, with Kartik right behind me. I stumble, and Kartik's hand steadies me. I turn and smile brightly at him, which he returns.

As soon as we are settled, Gorgon sets off. Felicity and Ann wave us off, and then disappear into the garden. I look around as the boat drifts on. The creatures have truly done a wonderful job. I see Bessie through the trees, leading Wendy, deep in conversation with a Hajin. Nymphs and shape-shifters stride by, raising beams and hammering away. Other creatures of all sorts swim in and out of view, every one of them working hard. I can't help but admire the marginal difference that their labor has made between the war-torn realms of my last visit and the ones before me now.

"You are all certainly doing very well." I say to Gorgon. "It looks like you are almost finished."

"Thank you, Most High." Gorgon replies. "We have been at work every day. It brings us all closer as creatures of the realms."

"Oh," I reply, unsure of what else to say. It is just as Ann had said. I finger my ring through my bodice, a habit I've started when I'm thinking. Kartik watches me out of the corner of his eye.

"You seem more apprehensive than before." Gorgon notices, looking at Kartik. "Do you not trust me? Or is this how lovers act?"

I blush lightly, but Kartik answers, "No, it is simply how _I_ act."

"I see." Gorgon responds, and I know she's aware that we have more news. She turns slowly to face the water again, but the snakes on her head continue to watch me, their eyes wide and unsettling. I feel my nerves crumbling under their gaze.

"Oh, fine." I sigh. "Gorgon, we're engaged. Though you probably already knew that."

"Yes, I knew." Gorgon replies without turning around. "But it is better to be told than to assume. Best wishes."

"Thank you." Kartik and I respond before turning to watch the working creatures.

Moments pass in silence. Gorgon continues to steer us through the realms, and I sit quietly, trying to find the right time to give Gorgon my message. I'm still unsure of how to do this as we travel along the shore where the forest folk live.

"Philon is leading the workers here." Gorgon hisses. "He has recovered from the fighting."

"Has he?" I ask. "That's good." I stare out at the foliage. "Actually, Gorgon, I have a message for Philon. Would you mind passing it on, later?"

"I do not mind, Most High."

"Good. Can we head back to the garden, then? I don't want to be overheard." Gorgon obliges. I watch her carefully.

"Your message, Most High?" Gorgon calls quietly.

I nod. "Right. I was planning on…having a meeting, of sorts. Between all the creatures. And I'll need your help, and Philon and Asha's, as well. How long do you think it would take the three of you to get the word around?"

"A few days. Three."

"Alright, then. I'll come back in three days." I hesitate. "Tell everyone that I am hosting a meeting in the garden between representatives of all the tribes. Even the Winterland ones. They do not need to send anyone if they do not wish to. But it regards the magic, and their share in it."

Gorgon nods. I relax, knowing that part of my task is done. Kartik's hands find mine, and he squeezes them gently. I lean against the side of the boat, turning to face him. We so rarely get a chance to talk freely, and this is as free as we will get. Gorgon pointedly ignores us.

"So," I start. "my debut is soon." Kartik nods. "And that means we have to tell my family."

"Yes," Kartik agrees.

"Do you have any idea how we're going to do that?" I ask.

"Haven't a clue."

"Spectacular." I mumble. "I don't, either." _Just like you have no idea how to bind the magic. Stupid._ The annoying voice in my head taunts. I mentally shrug off the pessimism.

"We'll figure something out." Kartik says, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "Don't worry."

I sigh and face him again. "How can you be so sure? Even if we do figure out what to say to them, how can we think that they'll just let us get married? They're going to fight to stop the wedding, Kartik. And I don't want to have to run off and elope. The shame would kill my family. I will, if I have to, but I don't _want_ to."

"Gemma," Kartik whispers, pulling me close. "I know that. I don't want you to hurt your family. They may protest, but I will fight to get us to the altar without a scandal. We have to think positively, Gemma. You can't win if you don't believe in our cause."

"But what if they don't listen?" I argue. "No matter how many times I say that you are what I want, and that I can only be happy with you, they don't have to hear me. I'm just a girl, remember?"

"They will listen, if you speak loud enough." Kartik runs his fingers through his hair distractedly. "Appeal to their better judgment. You said it before, your father likes me. And your brother is too terrified to say anything. The only one you have to worry about is your grandmother. Unless," Kartik looks anxiously at me. "you are having second thoughts?"

"No, not at all!" I insist. "I'm just nervous. We're about to tell my family that I'm not going to be the person they have groomed me to become. It's a daunting task."

"Gemma Doyle." Kartik says. "You have defeated creatures of the darkest sort. You saved two worlds, both the realms and our own. Are you saying that you are afraid of your own grandmother, who can't even think of coming after you while wearing a corset?"

I laugh. "No, just her fangs."

"Ah, but that's a rational fear." Kartik chuckles. "Seriously, though, Gemma. You have nothing to worry about. I'll be right there with you, always."

"I know." I sigh. I don't speak for a moment, thinking. "Kartik?"

"Yes?"

I stretch my neck and kiss him lightly. "I think I know how to tell them."

"Really? How?"

"We just have to be honest and come out with it. It wouldn't be right to be evasive. But, I don't think you should be in the room." Kartik opens his mouth, but I cut him off. "No, listen. Grandmama wouldn't take kindly to having you in the house. I want you there, of course, just in another room. After I tell her, then you can come in."

"Fine." Kartik relents after a moment. "But I refuse to be any farther."

"Of course." I say happily as we sail back towards my friends.

**The realms are hard to write! But I tried. And there's more of them in the future chapters. Yay?**

**So, some of you read my oneshot, 'Fading Scars'. I just wanted to thank you, like A LOT, for reviewing it. It was tons of fun to write, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to continue it after this is done. So, thanks!**

**Review, please? Or...Gorgon will turn Kartik to stone. And then make him a tree. So there.**

**Sucks at making up threats,**

**'Dreamer**


	7. Chapter 7: Chaos

**Thanks for all the reviews, guys! You're quickly inflating my writer ego. But that's a good thing, I swear! Anyway, here's chapter 7!**

**Disclaimer: I am not Libba Bray. If I was, my life would be awesome. As it is, it's simply average.**

The next three days pass uneventfully, but quickly. Girls run to and fro, preparing for their impending debuts. Our teachers strive to impress last-minute lessons in us so that we might make a better impression on society. I hardly listen. My mind is otherwise occupied.

On the day of my trip to the realms, I wake to the sound of rain pelting my window. Kartik smiles grimly at me.

"Good morning." He whispers to me.

"What's good about it?" I grumble back, too nervous to bother with manners. Kartik seems to understand, though. He pulls me close and kisses me softly.

"You're alive, aren't you?" He murmurs into my ear. "You are almost freed of finishing school. And we are together."

I smile weakly, my bad mood dissolving. "True."

Kartik chuckles, and my heart melts at the sound. I'm reluctant to leave him, but I have lessons to attend. I pull myself away unwillingly and collect my clothes. Kartik lies where he is, watching me. My body goes through the motions of dressing numbly, my mind thinking of my trip to the realms. As I slip into my corset, he stands and strides over to my dresser, sitting on the chair. I finish dressing and walk over to him, settling myself into his lap and reaching for my brush.

"Will you stay here today?" I ask him, running my comb through my hair. "The weather is too horrible to stay outside."

"I suppose." Kartik answers. I know he thinks I'm fussing, but truly I just don't want him to get sick. My debut is nearing, and I want him at my side when it comes.

I finish on my hair and reach for my ring. I grab it, but Kartik slips the chain out of my hand. He drapes the necklace delicately around my neck. When it is settled, he leans forward and kisses my forehead lightly.

"I'll come back at lunch." I sigh. Kartik nods, and I stroke his face gently. He holds my hand in his and kisses my palm. Grudgingly, I walk to the door. When I reach it, I turn around one last time. "I love you."

Kartik smiles. "I love you, too."

* * *

Lessons fly by abnormally fast. I go through them in a trance, too nervous about my trip into the realms to pay attention. At breakfast, I nearly tip at the marmalade into Martha's lap, saved only by Ann's fast hands. In French, Mademoiselle LeFarge has to ask me a question three times before I realize she's speaking to me. Fee kicks my chair.

"Pardon?" I ask, blushing. Felicity sighs behind me, but Cecily looks delighted at my embarrassment. Such a lovely girl. Silently, I wish her a lonely life in a nunnery.

"_Non, en François, plaît, Mademoiselle Doyle. Allez, vous ne connaissez pas la réponse n'est-ce pas?"_ Mademoiselle LeFarge asks, sounding vaguely exasperated. I stare desperately at her, trying to translate her French into more comprehendible English. Ann looks pityingly at me. I can practically hear Elizabeth and her acolytes shaking with quiet laughter. I fight the urge to use the magic on them, improve upon their hairstyle, perhaps.

_"Non, Mademoiselle LeFarge."_ I finally manage, hoping that I am correct and she is asking me if I know the answer, which, of course, I don't. But she seems satisfied, if disappointed, and moves on. I retreat back into my stupor, the flowery French and thudding rain around me blending together to become a distant haze of sound.

At dinner, I can hardly hold my spoon straight. My hands shake, so great are my nerves. Felicity and Ann talk over the clash of rain and thunder with the other girls, but I am too worried to feign nonchalance tonight. Instead, I stare straight forward, sipping my soup and mulling over my mission in the realms tonight.

"Gemma," Fee whispers in my ear as dinner ends. "it's time."

I stand on shaky legs and follow Fee and Ann. We make our way to the stairs, claiming exhaustion. Mrs. Nightwing looks shrewdly at us. When I catch her eye, she cocks her eyebrow questioningly. I give her an discreet nod. Her face pales and her mouth tightens, but we walk on before she has the chance to call us back.

Fee mutely leads us up the stairs, and we finally arrive at my door. I walk inside. Kartik is sitting on the bed, watching the storm through the window. When we enter, he stands and walks slowly towards us. I smile halfheartedly at him.

"Ready?" I manage to croak out through my dry throat. He nods. The four of us clasp hands, and I close my eyes, emptying my mind, to summon the door of light once more. It appears, and I walk through it on trembling legs, the others falling into step behind me like ghosts.

The first thing I see is Gorgon, standing nearby with her head full of writhing snakes, her expression smooth and unreadable. Behind her, the rest of the realms' representatives await me. Most seem to have come in pairs. I see all types of creatures, from nymphs and forest folk that I am familiar with to beings I have never seen before. Among the familiar faces, I see Philon, Asha, Bessie, and Wendy. Neela peeks out from behind Philon nervously. I make my way towards them, leading Kartik, Ann, and Felicity.

"Lady Hope!" Asha calls when she catches sight of me. She bows respectfully. Several other creatures imitate her.

"Hello," I smile feebly, returning their bows. "Thank you for coming."

"It is the least we could do, Priestess." Philon says in his exotic voice.

"But it better be worth our time." Bessie mumbles, just loud enough for me to hear. I frown at her. Obviously, her time in the realms without Pippa has done nothing for her distaste for me.

I bite my tongue to keep back the cross remark I long to throw at her. Instead, I face the creatures, my heart starting to beat wildly. Kartik moves closer to me.

"Right. On that note, let's begin." I pause, unsure of how to start. "We've been giving the magic a lot of thought. And I think we've come up with a plan. About binding it, I mean." I hear my voice trembling slightly.

The creatures look up at me with curious eyes. A fairy flutters closer.

I clear my throat lightly. "We thought that…it would be…fair to- to-" I take a shuddering breath, readying myself for their reactions. When I speak, my words are rushed. "We thought it would be best if we bind the magic to the realms itself. Not to individual creatures or tribes."

I finish, and hold my breath, waiting for the outbursts I know are coming. I am not disappointed. A centaur stomps his hooves angrily, narrowly missing poor Wendy, who yelps and scampers blindly away. Philon's cat-like eyes flash, and several Winterland creatures start yelling at me, with much brandishing of the fists. The nearby water nymphs splash furiously. Asha stays as she was, staring at the ground, as if she had expected nothing less than to be cheated of what she secretly wants, as always. Neela remains silent, but her eyes gain a triumphant look. I hear Ann's stifled gasp, and feel Kartik tense next to me. Fee stays mute.

"I told you, she is not to be trusted!" the centaur yells at Philon. "She wants to control the magic still!"

"I do not!" I reply heatedly. "This is the only fair way-"

"Fair?" a shape-shifter mimics, becoming my mirror image. "_Fair?_ How is giving the land _our_ magic fair?"

"Just listen-" I plead.

"No," a fairy shouts in its small voice. "we have done enough listening!"

"Shut it, you!" Fee hisses at the creature, snapping out of her reverie with a vengeance.

A Poppy Warrior stands and advances towards me. Kartik steps in front of me, scowling menacingly.

"Don't even try it." He growls. The Poppy Warrior stops short.

Bessie leaps to her feet. "You don' care about us! It's always been about you!" she shouts, pointing accusingly at me.

"Such has always been the way of the Order." Philon rumbles, looking at me in obvious disgust, a look echoed in the eyes of those around him.

Gorgon glares at the other creatures. "What does she have to gain by betraying us now? What reasons does she have for it?"

"Power!" cry the creatures, eyeing me irately.

"Power is nothing!" Gorgon roars. I stare at her, terrified. I've never seen Gorgon so angered, and she is a formidable sight with the snakes atop her head, hissing in their shared fury. "She has stood here and fought beside us, _for_ us! And still, you doubt her?"

At Gorgon's words, some of the creatures sit down, looking sheepishly away from me. Others only seem to grow more agitated. Wendy feels her way towards us, finding Ann. She clutches her arm, unseeing eyes wide with fear.

"What does that mean to us?" the centaur snarls. "She could turn her back any time she wants. The _Priestess_," he sneers at the word, "doesn't live here, among us. She can hide." A murmur of approval ripples through the creatures.

"Quiet, Haresh." A shape-shifter—the one who had imitated me before—scolds from the ground.

"No!" the centaur, Haresh, says, glaring. "I will not stay mute to the prejudices of the priestesses any longer. It is time for a change!"

"Listen to me!" I bellow, livid. I feel the magic coursing through me, and it takes all of my self-control to keep it contained. The creatures shrink away from me, fear creeping into their angry eyes. "I have no use for this power! It is too much for one person to have to bear. I don't want all of it, I never have! I didn't ask for this." I wave down at myself, practically vibrating with suppressed power.

"Words!" scoffs one of the forest folk. "They are nothing. Not truth, nor promise."

"They are words spoken by the person who means to grant you power, if you would let her!" I shout. Kartik walks back to my side, his eyes warning the creatures not to come any closer.

"Grant us power?" Haresh repeats skeptically. "You'll do no such thing. We know the minds of the Order, Priestess."

"Then you know nothing of my mind." I say coldly. "I am not part of the Order you once knew. I mean to return the magic magic taken by them to you."

The creatures fall silent, watching me warily. I look them over, examining every face. I can tell that most are on their way to accepting my offer. Others, such as Haresh, have fight in them still.

"I have risked life and limb to be here." I go on, quieter, glowering at those still silently protesting through glares. "I've rejected the help of the Order, women who have seen what I've seen and lived where I've lived. I've denied the Rakshana, men who have much more earthly power than I do. I've seen my friends and mother die. I fought to save your home. And yet, you doubt me."

A Winterlands creature coughs guiltily. Haresh crosses his arms.

"We have had losses, too, Priestess." He says.

"That is the outcome of war." Ann says quietly from behind me. Fee sniffs, nearly inaudibly, her eyes moist.

"War is a title for glorification." Gorgon corrects. "Chaos is the truth."

No one speaks. I see conflict warring in Haresh's eyes. A shadow of guilty victory settles into my stomach.

"If the magic goes to the realms," Philon starts, breaking the silence. "will we be able to use it?"

"If I use the correct binding spell, then yes. The magic should go from me to the realms, where you will all have access to it. The realms will be what the runes once were to the Order." I glance at my friends behind me. "We think that is the fairest way to bind the magic. If we go through with this plan, then all creatures have an equal share."

The creatures whisper to each other. I can see many of them nodding enthusiastically, and I feel considerably lighter. The shape-shifter looks questioningly at me.

"Why call this meeting, Lady Hope?" she asks, and the other creatures fall silent immediately, listening.

I think for a moment, in order to give an honest answer. "I wanted to give you all an equal chance to hear my plan and to accept it. I didn't want to just go and do whatever I wanted without your knowledge."

The shape-shifter smiles, nodding. Those around her look keenly at me, as though trying to catch me in a lie.

"You are an odd priestess, Most High." A Winterlands creature says. Others nod their heads in agreement. "None before you would have sought our opinions."

"Lady Hope is quite different from the priestesses of the past." Asha agrees warmly. I decide this is a compliment, and smile gratefully at her.

"Miss," Wendy asks quietly from Ann's side. "Bessie 'n me- we'll be able to use the magic too? Even tho we're not sup'osed to be here?"

"Yes, Wendy. You and Bessie will both be able to use the magic." I say, and the girl's sightless eyes shine. I turn to address the group at large. "I'll give you all a chance to discuss this. When you are ready, I will come back, and you can tell me if you agree or disagree. We can decide what to do from there."

The creatures nod to show that they understand, and then clump together, conversing intently. Wendy leaves us and feels her way back to the others. I beckon for Felicity, Ann, and Kartik to follow me, and we walk away from the group, deeper into the garden.

Ann and Felicity run away, catching piles of falling petals in their outstretched hands. Kartik and I follow at a slower pace. I find his hands and lace my fingers in his, watching Fee chase Ann around the garden, pelting her mercilessly with petals. Ann simply shrieks with laughter and returns the assaults with her own collection.

"You were very convincing back there." Kartik says, smiling down at me. "They'll find it hard to refuse you now."

I laugh. "You mean, once the magic showed itself, I was frightening enough to convince them not to cross me?"

"Something like that, yes." Kartik answers, laughing with me.

We stroll leisurely through the garden, talking quietly. My heart beats nervously as I wait for the creature's decision. I bring my ring out from my bodice and twirl it around my finger. Kartik kisses me lightly, and I stand on my toes to prolong it.

A mass of flower petals aimed at our faces sends me reeling away, gasping in surprise. Felicity sprints away, giggling hysterically. I laugh, swearing vengeance, and start to gather my own bouquet. A war of flowers follows, with me, Ann, and Felicity screeching like banshees, and Kartik standing by, watching with obvious amusement.

Eventually, we tire and flop down on the grass. Ann sings an old folk tune, and Fee makes a wreath out of flowers. Kartik and I lie together, watching the clouds and listening to Ann's stunning voice. After a while, my eyelids start to droop, and I am reminded of the late hour. Finally, Asha walks towards us, her face lit up in anticipation.

"Lady Hope, we have reached a decision." She says excitedly, motioning for me and Kartik to follow her. I rein in Fee and Ann, and together we trail after Asha to the waiting creatures. I study their faces. All of them display the same eager expression, except for Philon and Gorgon, who wear their usual stoic masks, and Haresh, who frowns at me. I smile innocently at him.

"Priestess," Philon says, and I turn my attention to him. "we have decided to accept your offer, and to bind the magic to the realms."

His words take a moment to register in my mind. Behind me, Ann gasps in surprise.

"R-really?" I stammer. Philon nods, and a wave of relief spreads through my body.

"Most High," Gorgon says. "when will you return to bind the magic?" Every gaze turns towards me. I swallow nervously.

"A few days." I answer. "No more than three. It will take time to plan what to say."

Philon nods solemnly. "We await your return, Priestess." With that, he stands and leaves, and the rest follow him. Haresh and Neela stride straight past me, barely glancing in my direction. Asha walks by, smiling and bowing.

Finally, I am alone with my friends and Gorgon. I exhale noisily, relaxing. Kartik pulls me to his chest.

"You did it, Gemma!" Fee exclaims, smiling gleefully. "You convinced them!"

"Yes, well done, Most High." Gorgon compliments. "I look forward to your return." She turns and heads for her ship. I watch her leave for a moment.

"Gemma?" Ann asks. "Are you alright?"

"Quite." I answer. "Just tired. All I can think about right now is my bed."

"Let's go, then!" Fee laughs, dancing merrily away. Ann follows her.

"You were spectacular back there, you know." Kartik whispers into my ear.

"Thank you." I say, smiling, reaching up to kiss him.

"Your welcome." He replies, pulling me forward. We walk together, hand in hand, listening to the sound of Ann's carefree singing. Her beautiful voice soars, filled with a hope that makes anything and everything seem possible.

**Tehehe I had a lot of fun looking up the French. I'm sorry if it's wrong, but I've never taken a French class. Tell me if it is wrong, and I'll fix it.**

**Anywho, I need reviews. Why? Because I'm going on a 12-hour car ride tomorrow straight after school, spending a day and a half with my family, then turning around and coming back. Fun? Not quite. Especially when you look at my car companions: a 10-year-old sister, a brat of a brother, a dog, and my mother. Make me feel better. Review. Please?**

**Or I'll make Gorgon eat Kartik this time. We all know he's tasty enough...**

**Dreading the car tomorrow,**

**'Dreamer**


	8. Chapter 8: Nightmare

**Wow, thanks again for all of the reviews! You guys are amazing. Seriously. And, in case you were wondering, my drive was as uneventful as I thought it would be. And cold. But I did get to work on my story. Anyway, here's Chapter 8!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own, Libba Bray does; if I owned it, Kartik and Gemma would be together, sans Kartik tree-ness.**

The next day, I spend my time trying to find the right words to use for binding the magic. Felicity and Ann sit silently on either side of me, and I know they're working to find a solution as well. The rain from yesterday hasn't completely let up, and the steady _drip drip_ of raindrops creates a rhythm that my mind works tirelessly to. But, as I don't know what is needed to be said to complete the binding, and my thoughts go in continuous circles. By the end of French, I'm thoroughly sick of magic.

In art, our new teacher, Miss King, does her best to direct our attention to a new drawing she has for our evaluation. She's a tall, bird-like woman, with wispy white hair and nervous hands. I can't say I like her much, or dislike her really. She's just…there.

"Miss Doyle," she asks me, and I jump slightly in my seat. "what do you think of this piece?"

I pretend to examine the drawing, a rather boring sketch of a woman standing in a sunny meadow, though I already know what she wants from me. Miss King is not the type of woman to encourage thinking. Perish the thought.

"Well, the effect of the charcoal strokes is quite lovely, Miss King." I say sweetly. "It's a marvelous drawing. The artist truly captured the spirit of the lady."

_The charcoal is smudged. Freya could have drawn a better sketch. And that lady is about as spirited as burnt toast._

"Thank you, Miss Doyle." Miss King turns her attention to Martha. I'm about to retreat back into my mind when I hear Felicity gasp slightly. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her scribbling frantically on a piece of paper. Fee passes the note to me, her eyes excited. I open it under my desk, shielding the contents from view.

_I've got it! Meet me in my room at lunch._

I look up, nodding discreetly, and pass the note on to Ann. My heart beats nervously. So Fee has thought of a way to binding the magic. I'm so close to finally riding myself of the extra magical weight. Will doing this end my problems with the realms? Somehow, I doubt it.

At lunch, I hardly pay attention to what I am eating. Mrs. Nightwing eyes me in warning when my fork droops, but doesn't chastise me. No one else seems suspicious of my anxiety. Fee, Ann, and I excuse ourselves as soon as possible, scurrying up the stairs to Felicity's room. I hesitate at my door, but then continue on, knowing that Kartik won't be back inside until later.

We file into Fee and Ann's room. I can feel Felicity's excitement, and that only makes my nerves multiply.

"Alright, what did you come up with?" I ask as Ann closes the door.

Felicity smiles at me. She takes a deep, excited breath. "Okay. I think you should say, 'I give the magic bound in me back to the creatures of the realms, so that it can be shared equally among all tribes.'"

I fight hard to keep from rolling my eyes. "That's a bit…long, don't you think?"

"It has to be!" Fee sounds offended. "You can't do everything you expect to do in so few words, Gemma. Believe me, I tried."

I exhale loudly. "I'll never remember it."

"So write it down, then." Fee snaps. "If you don't want to use it, then don't. I just thought I'd try to help."

Knowing that I don't have time to think of another way to bind the magic, I close my eyes in defeat. "Fee, I'll use it. I was just saying that it's long." I look out of the window. "Come on, then. We still have classes. But meet me in my room tonight."

* * *

"She's mental." Kartik says later, exasperated. The two of us are alone in my room, waiting for Felicity and Ann to retire from the great hall. I've just recited Felicity's idea for a binding spell. "There is no way that will work."

"It's all we have."

"It's a child's thought."

"Yes, but still, we don't have anything else." I lift up a finger to silence him. "I know it's not the best plan. But give it a chance. If this doesn't work, then we can always try again."

Kartik is silent, and I take this as a sign of his reluctant consent. I stand on my toes to kiss him. Suddenly, door flies open, and Kartik and I fly apart, wide eyes looking distractedly towards the door and our intruders.

"Oh!" Felicity's mouth drops open in delighted shock. Ann stands behind her, head down. "Terribly sorry. We forgot to knock."

"That's alright." I croak, trying to catch my breath. "We were just waiting for you."

Felicity looks like she would like to respond, but Ann nudges her gently, mutely silencing her. Fee sighs in defeat and reaches out a hand.

"Fine. Let's get this over with, and quickly, please. I feel like I haven't slept properly in weeks."

We come together once more. I close my eyes and focus, clearing my mind yet again. Once I've made the door of light appear, my heart lurches into a nervous tempo and a million frightened thoughts fly through my brain. The magic has been a part of me for so long. What if something happens to me when it leaves? What if it _doesn't_ leave? I'm swallowed by a wave of dread. How would the creatures react to that?

I walk wordlessly behind Kartik and Felicity through the door, trying to ignore my petrifying thoughts. Ann keeps pace with me, the quiet rustling of her skirts lulling me into a sense of familiarity as we wade through the garden towards the river. This is just another trip into the realms. I've come here under much worse conditions, haven't I?

Gorgon stands at her ship's side, staring absentmindedly in our direction.

"Most High," I hear her say. I wave weakly at her, too frightened to call back. "you have come to bind the magic?"

"Of course, Gorgon." I force myself to sound offhand. Though, judging by Gorgon's skeptic stare, I am unsuccessful.

"Would you like me to take you to Philon, Most High?" Gorgon asks.

"Yes, please." I say, and trail after Felicity, Ann, and Kartik as they follow her to the boat. With each step, my heart beats even faster than before. The ride to the forest is silent, all of us too tense and wound up to talk. The only one who seems at ease is Gorgon as she steers her ship like a true captain.

We pass under the waterfall, and I let the golden flakes coat my body. Gorgon and Kartik shake them off immediately. I laugh quietly, and Kartik smiles back, brushing aside a fleck of gold to kiss me boldly on the lips.

"That's quite a look, Gemma." He laughs when we pull apart. "I think you should keep it."

"Thank you, oh so much." I shake the remaining specks loose. "But I don't quite fancy the idea of becoming a living statuette."

"Suite yourself." Kartik chuckles. I open my mouth to reply, but Felicity cuts across me irritably.

"Sorry to interrupt," she says in a tone that indicates the contrary. "but we've arrived."

She turns on her heel, walking off of the boat and onto shore. I stare after her, wondering idly what has irked her so. But then my feet touch land again, and my brain focuses on the task at hand once more, my moment of lighthearted fun ending. The gravity of my duty weighs heavily on me as I follow Gorgon meekly through the trees to where Philon awaits us. Fee matches strides with Gorgon and speeds ahead, keeping her eyes averted from mine. Ann and Kartik stay with me, one at each of my sides. We arrive at the same place where I had first met Philon. I blink in surprise.

The representatives I met with yesterday are all huddled around each other, talking peacefully. It is an odd sight to see them together with no sign of hostility. No one notices us at first, long enough for me to scan the crowd. I see Haresh and Neela at the back of the pack, talking alone with each other. Bessie and Wendy are entertaining a small cluster of forest folk. The friendly shape-shifter stands with Asha and her group of Untouchables.

"Priestess," Philon calls to me from what appears to be the center of the group. Everyone turns to look at me. "you have returned."

"Yes," I say softly, the words stinging my dry throat. "I have."

"And you are prepared to give us the magic?" Haresh asks roughly, walking up to be at Philon's side. I see Neela peering around his hindquarters.

"I am prepared to split the magic amongst us all, yes." His suspicion fuels my courage. I stand straighter. "You still have doubts, Haresh?"

"Of course, Priestess." The centaur looks arrogantly at me. I wonder if we will ever reach a truce.

"Hush," Philon scolds. Haresh frowns. "Priestess, whenever you are ready."

"Er- right." My nerves return in full force. "Do you want to do this here?"

"If here is where you want to be."

I feel a stab of annoyance. Just once, I would love a straight answer from Philon. But before I can say as much, Felicity steps up to me.

"Gemma," she whispers, apparently forgetting her dark mood from before. "don't use what I told you."

"What?" I ask, surprised. "Why? And couldn't you tell me _before?_"

"I know, Gemma, and I'm sorry!" Felicity looks sheepishly at her feet. "But I've been thinking it over. It really isn't good at all, and I'm not so sure it will work."

"Well, what am I going to do now?"

"Make something up." Felicity suggests. "I'm sure you'll do better than I did."

"Right. Will do." I reply sarcastically. Fee looks down again. I should apologize, but I don't. Instead, I turn to face the creatures, my brain working wildly, trying to find a way to stall.

"Well, Priestess?" Haresh barks, and I jump. "Are you going to give us the magic or not?"

"Yes, Haresh."

"Get to it, then!"

I sigh in exasperation, but inside, I'm shaking. My heart beats frantically in my chest, and I am afraid that this won't work. Behind me, the creatures all fall silent, staring at me expectantly. I take a deep breath, and bend to place my hands on the soil.

Not a soul moves or speaks. Even Felicity is silent, waiting to see what I have come up with. I call out the first words I think of.

"I give this magic back to the realms, and the Winterlands, too, that it may be shared equally among the tribes!" At once, I feel a tugging sensation as some of the magic streams out of me. The creatures all gasp in shock, but I pay them no mind. I focus instead on staying on my feet and on the magic leaving me to seep into the realms.

Gone as suddenly as it had come, the tugging feeling stops, and I stand on shaking legs. A pair of arms snake around my waist, and I look up to see Kartik's warm eyes looking at me.

"Well done." He says, kissing my forehead gently.

"Lady Hope!" Asha shouts, and I turn to her. She stands, beaming, flanked by two other Hajin. There is something about her that's changed. In fact, all of the creatures appear different, much like Ann when she comes to the realms: vibrant, refreshed. "The magic! I can feel it! It worked!"

"That's wonderful." I mumble. Binding the magic has drained me so that I slump in Kartik's arms.

"You're tired." Philon observes. "Return to your world. We will be fine here."

Too exhausted to reply, I simply nod and let Kartik tow me towards the garden. Halfway there, my eyes close and I drift off to sleep.

* * *

My dreams that night are fitful. In them, I am alone in the dark forest of the realms, looking desperately for something. I don't know what it is, only that if I don't find it soon, it will be too late.

Suddenly, the sound of hoof falls echo through the quiet trees. I spin to find the source. Haresh approaches through the undergrowth, leering at me menacingly. I try to run, but my feet are tangled in my skirts. I fall backwards against a tree. Haresh comes towards me, hatred stamped across his face. I try to scream, but can't.

Haresh lowers his lips to my ears. "Don't worry, Priestess," he whispers, sending uncomfortable shivers down my body. "I'll take good care of the magic."

He pulls away, and something moves behind him. It's a girl, about my age, with curly brown hair, frightened blue eyes, and pale wrists bound in a rope. Her dress is tattered and stained, but a broach at her neck shows that she comes from a family with money. Her terrified eyes scream a desperate cry for help at me. Haresh sees me looking at her and smirks.

"She's mine now, Priestess." He sneers, turning away from me and approaching the girl. She throws me one last petrified glance, but before I can move, Haresh is galloping away, dragging the girl onto his back with him and quickly disappearing into the wall of trees. I take off after them, but my feet move in the sluggish pace of dreamers. My hair and skirt catch on branches, but I struggle on through the underbrush, desperate to find the girl and Haresh, sure that no good will come to her. In the distance, a high-pitched scream rips through the calm air.

"No!" I wake up in a sweat, gasping for air. "Kartik!" I pant, seizing his shoulder and shaking him awake. He bolts upright. "I had…a horrible dream…"

"Shh, Gemma," Kartik murmurs, pulling me close and stroking my hair. "Tell me. What happened?"

I quickly and shakily recount my dream for him. He listens intently, and when I finish, he kisses my eyelids soothingly.

"It was only a dream, Gemma." He whispers. "Nothing to worry about."

"I thought you believed in dreams?"

"I do." Kartik thinks for a moment. "I'll look out for any signs of a missing girl. You saw her face, right?" I nod. "Good. If something comes along, then we'll look into it. I won't let Haresh take the lives of innocent humans. It'll be alright, Gemma. I promise."

Still shaking, I nod and lie back down, curling into Kartik's chest and listening to his heart. His heartbeats are even and familiar. Mine are frantic, fueled by the fear leftover from my nightmare. Try as I might, I can't fall back asleep. Kartik kisses the top of my head.

"Sleep, Gemma." He whispers. "It will all be better in the morning."

My eyes droop slowly and unwillingly. Kartik rubs my back in soothing circles, and eventually, I am claimed once more by a dreamless sleep.

**Oh my goodness! Plot! Hahaha this was pretty fun to write. I know the binding was slightly lame. Alright, really lame. But I tried.**

**So exhausted from my drive. And from band practice, but that's a whole other story. Please review, or Haresh will get too familiar with Kartik. (poor Kartik...all of my threats involve him!)**

**Thinking of shortening her penname,**

**'Dreamer**


	9. Chapter 9: Swish

**Oh. My. Goodness. Twelve reviews? You spoil me. :) So I'm going to give you another chapter as a gift!**

**Disclaimer: Libba Bray owns the characters, and some of the dialogue (all of the dialogue I used can be found on pages 786-787 of TSFT).**

Over the next couple of days, Kartik and I listen for any signs of a missing girl. I tell Felicity and Ann about my nightmare, but, being trapped at Spence as we are, we have very few chances to collect any gossip. So, I grudgingly let Kartik go off and investigate on his own, where he can hear and see more. Meanwhile, Inspector Kent is the only means I have of gathering news, but his frequent visits are, more often than not, fruitless, as he doesn't give us girls much information without the proper questioning.

Two days after my nightmare of a vision, the Inspector comes to call. I sit with Fee and Ann in the tent, talking lazily and not interested in the least in drilling Mr. Kent about kidnapped young ladies. But I drag myself out of the scarfed pavilion anyway and walk towards the small crowd of girls listening to stories of the world outside of Spence.

"I have never had such a tiring day!" Inspector Kent sighs to us girls when we are all settled around him. "It's been a nightmare, honestly. The half-penny papers are having a field day with the news."

"What news, Mr. Kent?" pipes up a young girl.

"I really shouldn't say-"

"Oh, please do!" another little girl begs, sticking out her bottom lip pleadingly.

The Inspector appears to think it over. "Well, alright." We all cheer. "But only because it serves as a reminder of the dangers of the city to a lone woman." He pauses to be sure we all understand the importance of this lesson. When he is satisfied that we do, he continues. "A young lady, not much older than some of you, went walking through London yesterday without an escort. She told her family that she was to meet a friend at a nearby shop, but, as far as we can tell, the girl never showed up anywhere _near_ the store. Her friend waited for her for nearly an hour before contacting the constable."

"What happened to her, Inspector?" I ask, my attention caught.

He turns his gaze to me. "We can't be sure. Her trail ends at the door to her home. We spent all of today looking for a trace of her, any trace at all, and we haven't found a single thing. It's as if she's vanished completely off the face of the earth. The poor child." Inspector Kent adds, shaking his head woefully. The girls around me all gasp and whisper excitedly to each other.

"What did she look like?" Felicity asks, glancing pointedly in my direction.

"She was quite the looker." Inspector Kent answers. "Hair as brown as chocolate, eyes as blue as the sky. Would have made a good wife for someone. Rumor has it, she _did_ have a suitor. But she didn't care for him much. According to the story, she tried to refuse him, but he kept coming after her. Some people believe she got fed up with it, and with him. They are saying that she's run off to be with someone else."

"No!" My fellow pupils do a poor job of hiding their scandalized delight. I fight hard to keep from rolling my eyes at the pettiness of it all.

"That is simply a rumor, of course." The Inspector says hurriedly. "More likely, she was walking to meet her friend and was abducted. She was rather beautiful, as I said, and her family has a good deal of money. It's a fairly straightforward motive. The only problem is working out who the criminal is."

"What was the girl's name?" Ann asks timidly.

"Her name?" Mr. Kent squints his eyes, trying to remember. "Ah, yes. It was Miss Jacqueline Foxworthy."

Jacqueline Foxworthy. It's an unfamiliar name to me, and, judging by the looks of curiosity on the faces of the girls around me, no one else knows of her, either.

"I don't recall meeting any Foxworthy's in London." Cecily purrs.

"You wouldn't have." Inspector Kent agrees. "They just recently moved to London, from America."

"How dreadful." Martha trills. For once, I agree with her, though, unlike hers, my remorse is true.

"It is indeed." the Inspector sighs. "But let this serve as a forewarning to you all. Never go out without an escort. It's not safe for young ladies." We all nod solemnly, just as Mademoiselle LeFarge enters the room. Inspector Kent's eyes light up at the sight of her and he excuses himself from our company. Felicity, Ann, and I retreat back into the tent amid animated conversations about the Inspector's shocking news.

"Well, there you go, Gemma." Felicity says the moment we sit down. "Your mystery girl is Jacqueline Foxworthy."

"Maybe. But doesn't tell us why I had a nightmare about her and Haresh." I lean against the back of my chair with a sigh. "I haven't even seen what this girl looks like. It is quite possible that the girl in my dream and Miss Foxworthy are two completely different people, and that Haresh hasn't left the realms and is busy enjoying the magic." I close my eyes jadedly.

Felicity snorts in disbelief, but, thankfully, drops the subject.

"Well, we only have a few days left here." She says wistfully. "And then we make our debuts."

"I'm sure you will both have a marvelous time at your debuts." Ann sighs, looking at the floor and tracing patterns in the carpet. Felicity dreamily bobs her head in agreement, completely oblivious to Ann's gloom.

"And we can't forget Ann's stage debut, either." I add. Felicity look at me in confusion, obviously not understanding why I would bring that up now, as a blissful smile spreads across Ann's face. I change the subject before Fee can say anything. "Have either of you got your things packed? I'm terrified that I'm going to forget something."

"Haven't packed a thing." Felicity replies promptly, and Ann shakes her head. "Don't worry. If we forget anything, Brigid will send it after us." She stretches and yawns. "I'm absolutely exhausted. I think I'll turn in."

She walks out of the tent. Ann and I sit and talk for a while, discussing our nearing departure. I have mixed feelings about leaving Spence. I'm excited to become an adult, terrified to make my debut, eager to start my life with Kartik, and petrified to tell my family about my engagement. But I don't tell Ann any of this. Instead, we talk about our immediate plans for life after Spence.

Eventually, we tire of the tent and traipse up the stairs to our rooms. I slip into mine, calling goodnight to Ann as she carries on to her new room with Felicity. I feel a nostalgic twinge of longing for the old days, when Ann's gentle snoring would lull me to sleep. The days before the war in the realms.

I shake my head sadly and walk inside. Kartik is nowhere to be seen. I don't find this odd; for the past two nights, he's been out late, trying to find information about any mysterious kidnappings. Yawning, I walk to the window and open it for when Kartik does come back. I change into my nightclothes and crawl into bed to wait for his return.

As I lie in bed, my eyes start to droop and I doze off. I'm not sure how much time passes, but the next thing I know, a muffled noise, much like a footstep, sounds from somewhere outside my door. My eyes fly open and look around the dark room. I listen closely. There it is again, even closer, sending a trill of fear through my veins.

_Step…step…_

I try to calm my panicking brain. It could be one of the other girls, I reason, sneaking down to the kitchens, or something equally as innocent. It could even be Mrs. Nightwing, checking on her sleeping pupils. It doesn't have to be something sinister.

_Step…step…swish_…

Swish? My heart beats faster. That was not the sound of a rustling skirt. Someone is creeping about Spence. Could it be someone unwanted? A step thuds nearer to my door. Whoever it is attempts to stifle the sound, trying to remain unnoticed, though it is too late for that. I lie still as death and keep my eyes trained in the direction of my door, fully expecting it to be throw open at any time by some grisly criminal. Or worse.

_Step…swish…step…_

The noise comes cautiously closer, then stops. I hold my breath. _Step…_

"Gemma."

I nearly scream as a dark shape comes in through the window. But then I recognize Kartik's form, and I throw myself out of bed into his arms.

"K-Kartik!" I gasp, still frightened. He pulls away to look at my face.

"What's wrong?" he asks in a concerned voice.

"I heard something- something odd." I whisper back, pointing a trembling finger at the door. "Out there."

Kartik stiffens. "Stay here." He strides noiselessly to the door and presses his ear to it. After a moment, he opens it so that I can see a small sliver of the hall, and peers out. He opens the door further. A minute passes, and he pulls his head back into the room.

"Nothing." He says, walking back to my side. "If there was something there before, it's gone now. You're safe."

I exhale in relief and flop back down on the bed. Kartik sits next to me. I reach for his hand automatically.

"Inspector Kent paid us a visit today." I tell him shakily. "He had some rather interesting information for us." I tell Kartik the news about Miss Foxworthy. He listens wordlessly.

"And Fee thinks that Jacqueline Foxworthy and the girl in my dream are the same." I finish with a sigh. "But I can't think of a single reason for Haresh to take Miss Foxworthy, or anyone, for that matter." As I say this, a memory stirs in the back of my mind. Something tells me that it's important, something I must recollect. I attempt to recall it, but the harder I try, the foggier it becomes. Eventually, I give up and lean further into Kartik's arms.

"We'll figure this nightmare out eventually, Gemma." Kartik reassures me, his hands tracing my spine. "But for right now, we have more pressing problems."

"Oh?" I ask. The sensation of his touch on my back is quite distracting. "Such as?"

His hands wander to my side. "We're returning to London the day after next."

"Yes." I let my fingers trace his jaw. "And that's a problem?"

"Well, your grandmother will hardly consent to you and I sleeping together." Kartik murmurs into my ear, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine.

"Ah." My voice is a whisper, unable to draw forth the air required to speak properly.

Kartik pulls me to him and leans back to lie on the bed. He trails his mouth over my neck. I entwine my fingers in his hair, cradling his face to mine. His lips drift away to hover over the swell of my breasts, the hint of skin exposed by my nightgown's neckline. I gasp when his lips brush the bare skin. Kartik shifts his weight, and his waist presses against mine. A mad craving for him surges through my body.

"Kartik…" my voice is a raspy murmur. But he knows what I want to say.

"I love you, too." He murmurs, and I feel myself surrendering completely to my desire. I press my lips to his neck. Kartik groans softly. "Gemma…" I cover his mouth with mine, pushing off his shirt. He slides my nightgown over my head. My tongue makes small explorations in his mouth, my hands traveling the length of his body. His legs straddle my bare hips.

His delicious scent envelopes me, and I think of nothing but his touch on my warm skin. And then we're a mass of tousled sheets and tangled limbs, each of us trying to prove our love to the other. Each sound radiates passion, each touch exudes affection. I give my attention solely to Kartik, but at the back of my mind, one thing repeats itself again and again.

_Swish…_

* * *

The morning of our departure to London is sunny and beautiful. Mrs. Nightwing stands with Ann, Felicity, and I on the front lawn as we await our carriages. Cecily, Martha, and Elizabeth have already left. Our luggage is at our feet. Mrs. Nightwing nervously fixes our appearance, occasionally adjusting a broach or straightening a hat.

It's a bittersweet moment, to be leaving now. I long to be freed of the restricting bind that is finishing school, but know I will miss Spence and the memories it holds within its gray walls. I look up at the great stone building. The gargoyles glower back at me.

"Have you enough handkerchiefs? A lady can never have too many handkerchiefs." Mrs. Nightwing asks, for the what seems like the millionth time.

"Yes, thank you, Mrs. Nightwing." Ann answers.

"Ah, good, good." Mrs. Nightwing replies, smoothing a wrinkle in my sleeve and patting Ann's collar down.

I watch Ann finger her earlobes and the garnets in them, a parting gift from Fee, delicately. The ivory elephant from India that I've given her earlier is tucked away in her bag.

Ann and Felicity's carriage arrives before mine. Their driver jumps down from his perch, tipping his hat towards us and securing the luggage tightly. The younger girls clustered near us scramble inside to deliver the news of Fee and Ann's departure. Felicity rolls her eyes at them and slides inside first, waving energetically at me from the window. Ann and I embrace, not letting go for a long time. But she pulls away eventually and climbs in after Fee.

"Goodbye!" Ann shouts as the carriage pulls away to her new life in London and the Gaiety theatre. She waves a gloved hand at me out of the window. "Till tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow!"

I wave to them until the carriage is out of sight. Mrs. Nightwing sniffs from my side. I look up at her in surprise as she dabs at her eyes with an elegant handkerchief. It's quite unsettling to see my strong, slightly daunting headmistress looking so defenseless.

"It's always hard, watching my girls leave." She admits tearfully in response to my stare. "So few of you ever come back." I nod sympathetically. "But it's a sign that I've done my job well. And most of them do go on to make good marriages. I don't doubt you'll be one of Spence's most proud daughters, Miss Doyle."

I cough, embarrassed. "Thank you, Mrs. Nightwing." An approaching carriage saves me from further conversation.

"Oh!" my headmistress exclaims, bustling over to the driver. "Here we are. Make sure the luggage is properly secured. That's it. Now, Miss Doyle, have a safe trip. I look forward to your return for Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding."

"Thank you, Mrs. Nightwing." I sound like a broken record. "I look forward to it as well." Mrs. Nightwing smiles sadly.

"Thank _you_, Miss Doyle." She replies, extending her hand. I shake it politely and turn to settle into the cab, waving at the very small crowd at the doors of Spence.

The carriage starts to drive away. Brigid blows her nose into a worn handkerchief with a sound like a trumpet from her position at the door. Mrs. Nightwing waves her own handkerchief in farewell. The face of my former teacher grows more and more distant as the horses driving the carriage pick up speed.

I lean out of the carriage as far as I can without falling, watching Spence Academy disappear into the distance. The sun glints off of the many windows, where girls clad in white uniforms parade by without a care in the world. I smile up at the magnificent gargoyles, and wave until there is nothing left to see.

**Bye, Spence...for now! Ha now you know I couldn't let Gemma and Kartik part without saying goodbye properly...or improperly, rather. :D**

**I changed my penname. But you probablly already noticed that. In case you were wondering, 'BKR' are my initials.**

**Okay, please review. Because I have Concert Festival on Wednesday (band thing) and I have a duet...my first one EVER. So excited, but so scared, so I need the confidence boost, please! Also, I found out recently that my summer camp up at the stables isn't going on...so I need comfort (and thanks in advance to LunaEquus, because she's already started the comfort)! If you don't review, I'll turn Grandmama into a werewolf and make her bite Gemma's head off. And that would be a shame.**

**Likes vampires more than werewolves,**

**-b.k.r-**


	10. Chapter 10: Illusion

**Hehe reviews make me happy. And because I'm happy, here's another chapter!!**

**Disclaimer: I am not unbearably cool like Libba Bray, because I am not her. I do not own these characters, or even some of the words. Any words I used can be found on pages 789-796 of TSFT.**

On the evening of my debut, the carriage comes to carry me and my family to Saint James's Palace. The excitement in the air is tangible, much like the magic of the realms. I stand in the parlor, a vision in white fabric and ostrich feathers. A magnificent diamond necklace shimmers around my neck like dewdrops.

"You look wonderful, Gem. Are you ready to take that long walk?" Tom asks me, pecking my cheek.

"I think so. I hope so." My heart sprints faster and faster.

Father gives me his frail arm. I take it, feeling his prominent charm work on my nerves. "Miss Gemma Doyle of Belgravia, I presume?"

"Yes," I laugh. "If you say so."

At the Palace, Father and I wait with the procession of other soon-to-be women and their own fathers. We are all frightfully nervous, checking our appearances and straining our necks for a glimpse of the mighty Queen. I await my turn for excruciatingly long seconds as the girls ahead of me enter the chamber of Saint James's Palace and curtsy to the Queen.

"Courage," Father whispers into my ear with a kiss as the doors open to admit me into the chamber. At the end of a long red carpet sits Her Majesty, Queen Victoria.

The courtier calls my name. "Miss Gemma Doyle!"

I follow Father down the carpet and try to remember Kartik's words of encouragement.

_"Stand proud, Gemma. Focus on the positive. You'll be fine. And remember to breathe!_"

I fight to keep the nonchalant illusion that is expected of me by the watching crowd, even as my palms sweat and my heartbeats go ragged. Father's arm is the only thing that brings me nearer and nearer to Her Majesty, a stern statue in the distance. I inhale shakily. At last, I reach her. I summon every ounce of grace earned at Spence and lower myself to the ground, bowing low to my Queen. Time stops. And then I feel her tap my shoulder, signaling me to rise. I obey, and Father leads me slowly in the direction of the other girls who have just become women.

* * *

After all of the girls have walked into the chamber, I sip my first glass of champagne and watch the other girls parade about. Suddenly, Lord Denby is at my side.

"Congratulations," he says, a fake smile plastered on his face. "On your debut and on that other matter. I understand from Fowlson that you were quite magnificent."

"Thank you." I sample from my champagne glass again.

"And have you succeeded in the second task?" he asks, dropping his voice further. "Have you bound the magic?"

I turn away to watch the dancing girls again. "I have."

Lord Denby's mouth opens in horror, but he quickly closes it in a smile. "Well, then. You know, Miss Doyle, I admire your…persistence. And, in light of recent events, I believe it would be wise if we were to work together- be partners, if you will. Friends, even. You could use the help of the Rakshana."

I snort in disbelief and hand him my half-empty glass. "No. You do not understand true partnership, sir. So we shall not be friends, Lord Denby. And as for the Rakshana, they are of no help to me."

Lord Denby looks like he would like to reply, but before he can, Tom appears, smiling icily. "I should like to dance with my sister, if you, please, Lord Denby."

"Of course, old chap. There's a good man," Lord Denby says, drinking the last of my champagne. Tom leads me away, and I follow without so much as a backward glance.

* * *

When I retire from the dance floor, I approach my father before he can sneak off to brandy with the other men. "Papa, I would like to have a word, if you please. Privately."

A shadow crosses his face briefly, but then it is gone. He does not seem to recall the consequences of our last private discussion at Spence's masked ball, though the events are clear in my mind. We walk into a rank-smelling sitting room. Father takes a seat on an armchair as I stride across the room. I finger the drapes hanging there, breathing in the scent of ancient cigar smoke. The aroma is much like my father: fading in strength and existence.

"Papa," I start. "I am most grateful for this evening. Thank you."

"You're welcome, my dear…"

"Yes, thank you…but I shan't attend any other parties. I don't wish to continue my season."

Father looks surprised. "Indeed? And why not? Haven't you been given the best of everything?"

"Yes, and I am most grateful for it."

"Then what is this nonsense?" Father sounds cross.

"I know. It makes no sense. But I have thought long and hard on this, Papa. I believe it is for the best."

"Come now, pet," my father gazes sternly at me. "let's not have this foolery. What could possibly make you want to sit out on your season?"

I hesitate. "I- there are many reasons."

"Oh?" He cocks an eyebrow. "Such as?"

"Papa, I don't imagine this life is for me. Parties and endless balls and gossip. I don't wish to spend my days making myself small enough to fit into such a narrow world. I cannot speak with their bit in my mouth."

"I don't understand." Father shakes his head, irritated.

"I'm not asking you to understand, Papa. I'm asking for you to accept."

"Accept what?"

"My decision."

All is quiet. I wait anxiously for Father to speak, but he doesn't. Moments pass, and still, Father remains mute. Finally, after what seems like hours, he looks up.

"Alright, pet. I know you, and your stubbornness. I should; it's me you got it from." He chuckles dryly. "You may sit out on your season." I open my mouth, but Father lifts a hand to silence me. "I have questions, of course. How will you marry? Or do you intend to marry?"

Instantly, my hands begin to tremble. "W-Well, Papa, that is the…other reason I mentioned." Father's questioning eyes narrow suspiciously. "Y-You see, I've already got…a suitor, of sorts. A f-fiancé, r-r-really."

Quick as a flash, Father is on his feet. I start and step back. But the speed of his leap temporarily stuns my father, and he sinks back to the chair, his head in his hands.

"Gemma," he whispers gruffly. I take a hesitant step forward. "this is a horrible joke."

"I'm sorry, Papa." _Yes, so sorry, it was only a laugh. Let's get back to the dancing, now, please._ "But it's true. Do…do you remember our old coachman, Mr. Kartik?"

Father lifts his head sharply. "What about him?" he barks.

I fall back against the wall again. "W-Well…he…I…"

A look of dawning comprehension crosses Father's face. Soon, though, it is replaced by anger. "No." He says, standing again. "I absolutely forbid it."

I stride forward again, reaching for Father. "Please, Papa-"

"I said no!" Father's voice is an irate snarl. "No daughter of mine will marry Indian riffraff."

"Papa!" I receive the insult like I would a slap. "Listen to me, please!"

"Gemma Doyle, I am the father here." He says. "And I refuse to marry my daughter off to a former coachman."

The magic churns inside me, but I fight it down. The memory of the last time I'd used it on Father swims to the front of my mind. Calling the magic forth now would only make things worse. I am on my own. Now, more than ever, I wish Kartik were at my side.

"Papa, _listen_." I beg, swallowing my fear and approaching him. "Mr. Kartik and I have been on speaking terms since Christmas." Father's face pales and he looks away from me. "He was employed near Spence, and our paths crossed several times." I say, inventing the story as I go. "He was quite sympathetic when I was dealing with…Miss Bradshaw's departure from Spence, and with your illness. He is more of a friend than a mere coachman to me. We've thought a great deal about the engagement, Papa. It is hardly a whim."

"How can you be sure that your inheritance is not what Mr. Kartik is after?" My father asks.

"Because I trust him." My voice turns cold. "And what difference is there between a gentleman, years older than myself, courting me, and a man much more to my liking wishing to marry me? Only status, Papa." I reach for my father's hand. "Papa, please. He is what I want, and I am what he wants. I don't intend to make you ashamed of me. But I truly care for Mr. Kartik. I wouldn't be happy with some rich gentleman who cares for nothing but society. That is not my destiny, Papa. Surely you, of all people, can understand that."

Another silent moment passes. I look into my father's eyes and see conflict raging in them.

"Have I ever told you the story of the tiger?" Father asks finally, sagging in his chair.

"Yes, Papa. You have." I answer.

Father smiles sadly. "But have I told you the _whole_ story?" I blink in confusion. He sighs and stands, walking in the opposite direction. He stops before a window. I think of the mysterious picture in Father's study, and what I had thought of as rambling due to the morphine. A shiver of fear slides through my bones. I'm not sure if I want to know this story. But Father means to tell it.

"The tiger had gone." He says, still facing the window. "He did not come around again. But the tiger had come too close, you see. I no longer felt safe. I hired he best tracker in Bombay. We tracked for days, eventually winding up in the mountains. We found him at a small watering hole. He looked up at us, but didn't charge. He took no notice of us at all but for that one glance. 'Sahib, let us go,' the boy said. 'This tiger means you no harm.' He was right, of course. But the gun was in my hand, and I was a man possessed. I took aim and shot it dead on the spot. I sold the skin for a fortune in Bombay, and the buyer called me brave for it. But it was not courage that brought me to that; it was fear."

I stare in silent shock at my father, but he pays me no mind. "I couldn't live with the threat that single tiger posed. But you, pet," he turns to face me, with something like pride in his eyes. "you faced the tiger and survived."

He coughs several times, his whole frame heaving with the force of it. He pulls a handkerchief out of his pocket and covers his mouth with it. The coughs slow, and he hastily stows the handkerchief back in his pocket, so that I cannot see the stain that is surely there, as if it doesn't exist. Smoke in mirrors.

"The time has come for me to face my tiger. I shall return to India. Your future is yours to shape. I shall prepare your grandmother for the scandal of it." Father says throatily.

"Thank you, Papa." I say. "But I would like to speak with Grandmama myself, if you please. Not tonight, but soon."

"Yes," Father says, smiling slightly. "all the luck with that. Now, if you don't mind, I should like to dance with my daughter on the occasion of her debut."

I take his offered arm. "I should like that very much."

* * *

Later that night, I stand in my room, fully dressed and waiting silently. Kartik comes, soundless as a shadow, through my window.

"Gemma," he whispers, walking briskly towards me, "did you speak with your father?"

"Yes," I murmur back, smiling slightly and snaking my arms around his waist. "I did. Kartik, he agreed to let us marry."

Kartik makes a sound like a suppressed cry and embraces me tightly. I laugh and stretch my neck to kiss him.

"Gemma," Kartik sighs when we pull apart, "we're so close now. We'll be getting married soon."

I nod. "But not until after I tell my grandmother."

"True," Kartik agrees. "but that is for tomorrow. For now, just be contented with your father's approval." He kisses me again. When we pull apart, he gazes at me intently.

"What?" I look down at myself hurriedly, checking for any offensive wrinkles or stains in my dress. "Is something wrong?"

"No, you silly girl." Kartik laughs, pulling me close again. "You're beautiful, Gem."

"Oh. Thank you." I murmur, blushing, then yawn hugely. Kartik chuckles.

"You're tired." He remarks. "Go to sleep." I try to protest, but Kartik holds up his hand to silence me. "I will come tomorrow for our meeting with your grandmother." I nod reluctantly. Kartik kisses my forehead softly. "Goodnight."

He walks to the window and jumps out gracefully. I stay where I am, wishing that he could stay the night with me. But I know there is too great a chance of being discovered together, something I do not need happening the night before revealing our engagement. Grudgingly, I go about changing into my nightgown. Crawling into bed, I let my mind stray to the events of my day.

I curtsied for my Queen and became a woman. I received Father's permission to marry Kartik. Society's expectations are behind me, and I am free to be my own person. And yet, come tomorrow, I will speak with my grandmother, a woman lost to the illusion of society, and who holds the power to imprison me in society's grasp and to keep me and Kartik apart.

But I won't let her. I refuse to be pulled by society's current. I want to dictate my own story, live by my own guidelines, with Kartik. I do not wish to build myself a world of glamorous deceit and glittering ignorance, only to break down all that I know to fit into the ever-changing shape of society's liking. I detest the illusion that is society, the false façade that is exuded by every gentleman who sees differences as impurities, and by every woman who neglects to explore the boundaries of her own highly capable mind. Society is nothing but a world full of lies and illusions. It always has been; the only difference now is that I realize that.

A wave of sadness washes over me. That is the life my family lives, the life chosen for me at birth. But, unlike my family, I strive to escape that. I struggle to free myself from that mockery of a life, like my father struggled to free his family from the threat of the tiger.

Tomorrow, I will face my own tiger in the form of my grandmother. And when I survive, I will be able to live life with Kartik, free of the bind that comes with keeping secrets.

I smile. Tomorrow may not be so horrible, after all.

**Hehehe That was...fun? Hard? A little of both, honestly. But the next chapter was the real doozy...it's the eagerly awaited Gemma/Grandmama "smackdown", as one of you guys so elegantly put it (lol).**

**In case you're curious, Concert Festival was funnnnn. But we got a II/Excellent. One measly point away from a I/Superior. Grrrrr!! The judge who gave us the two that did us in was crazy. But whatever. Oh, and my duet sucked. Neither one of us was in tune. -groan-**

**Can't wait to see what you think of the NEXT fight,**

**-b.k.r-**


	11. Chapter 11: Consent

**Woo, reviews! You guys rock. So here's chapter 11!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own this. Libba Bray does. I am not worthy of the name Libba Bray. All hail.**

In the morning, I wake to find weak sunlight streaming through my window. I roll over and reach out for Kartik, but my fingers find nothing but air. I bolt upright, and then remember that Kartik is hiding in the stables. I settle back into my pillows with a groan, missing Kartik's warmth next to me. Without him, the bed seems empty. Feeling oddly lonely, I get up to dress.

Once changed, I sneak outside, too anxious to spend time in the house, where Grandmama might find me. Above me, gray clouds obscure the sun, a sure sign of rain, and I jog across the yard to the shelter of the stable. The sound of restless horses greets me as I walk into the darkened light of the barn. I stand in the aisle, unsure of where Kartik would be. Ginger, my spirited mount, sticks her head over the stall door. I walk over to her.

"Hello, girl," I whisper, stroking her nose. "you wouldn't happen to know where I could find Kartik, would you?"

"Actually," a deep voice answers from behind me. "I might be able to help you."

"Kartik!" I gasp, breathless, spinning to face him. "You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"I'm sorry."

"It's alright." I drape my arms around his waist. "Are you ready for this afternoon?"

Kartik nods. "If you are." He rests his chin on the top of my head. "I'll be outside, waiting. You're sure you don't want me in there with you?"

"Yes, I am." I reply into his chest. "But let's not talk about that right now. Please?"

"Alright." Kartik laughs. "What do you want to talk about?"

I look up at him and smile in what I hope is a flirtatious manner. "Honestly, I'd rather not talk at all."

* * *

Later, I make my way back to the house, trying to fix my hair back into its previous style, a blissful, secretive smile on my face. Kartik and I had spent a memorable and thoroughly non-verbal hour in the stable with Ginger and Rajah, my father's horse, and my undone hair is evidence to the fact.

I walk into the house, still messing with my pins. As I turn the corner to walk up the stairs, Grandmama appears, looking cross. I stop short, afraid to face my grandmother in the disorderly state I'm in now.

"There you are, Gemma," she says, eyeing me in disapproval. "where have you been? And what happened to your hair?"

"I was visiting Ginger, Grandmama," I reply, only giving her part of the truth. "The wind was stronger than I thought."

"Yes, well, you spent a good deal of the morning outside." Grandmama sniffs. "Go and clean yourself up. Meet me in the parlor when you're fit to be seen. And for heaven's sake, change your clothes. You smell like a groom." She complains, wrinkling her nose in distaste.

I nod obediently and walk past her to my room. Honestly, I don't know what she's complaining about; the only thing I can smell on me is the organic scent of the stables, and Kartik's own enchanting natural cologne. But I need to keep Grandmama in a good humor, so I trudge upstairs to appease her.

Once presentable, I walk back into the sitting room, my dress replaced and my hair back in its pins. Grandmama is perched on the chair by the window, sipping her tea daintily. Mrs. Jones stands nearby, her cheerless face a mask of polite indifference, though I know she must be terribly bored.

"Poor Thomas, out the door for the hospital at _such_ a disagreeable hour. I don't know how he manages his schedule." Grandmama tuts to Mrs. Jones over her tea, shaking her head. "Ah, much better, Gemma." She says when she notices me, nodding in approval. "You look fitting for a newly debuted woman." I smile politely as my nerves start to panic.

"Thank you, Grandmama." I reply tightly. The clock on the wall shows that is it 11:57, nearly noon.

"Sit, Gemma." I obey. "Now, tell me. Did you enjoy your debut?" my grandmother asks with a nostalgic smile.

"Yes, thank you." I am mechanical, saying what wants to be heard. "It was marvelous."

"Such a lovely night," Grandmama agrees. "A fantastic start to your season."

"Er…right." I stammer. "G-Grandmama, about my season—"

"Oh, Gemma, I know exactly what you want to say." Grandmama interrupts with a knowing look on her face, though she knows nothing at all. "You're frightened. I remember the start of my own season. Seems most alarming, I know. But you must go into your season with a straight back and a sure face. After all, a man might find you before your season has the chance to truly start." She says, laughing her carefully practiced laugh, the one ladies use when nothing is truly funny, but manners dictate that they should laugh anyway.

_Tick. Tick_. The clock chimes closer and closer to noon, making my palms sweat.

"A-Actually, Grandmama," I start fidgeting. "I meant to speak with you about that."

"Don't twitch so, Gemma." Grandmama reprimands. "It's unbecoming."

"Yes, Grandmama." I swallow hard, trying to find the right words. My heart hammers against my bodice, pressing my ring hidden there into my chest. "But…there is s-something I have to discuss w-with you-"

"Really, Gemma." My grandmother chastises, looking disapproving. "All this stuttering. It's not favorable." I nod meekly. "Mrs. Jones, please excuse us for a moment."

I sit silently in my chair as Mrs. Jones leaves the room, shutting the door behind her. I wonder idly if Kartik is inside yet.

"Grandmama," I pause. "I- I…want to thank you for last night, and for everything you've done to get me here." I blink up at the ceiling. "It is greatly appreciated." Grandmama opens her mouth to reply, but I shake my head. "Please, wait." Grandmama looks confused, but I hardly notice. The events of my last similar conversation, the one with Father last night, replay in my mind, like an moving photograph. "It is all appreciated, yes…but I do not wish to go through a season."

I stare hard up at the ceiling, waiting for my grandmother's wrath to crash down upon me. But it does not. Instead, a solid silence greets my words, and I find her stillness more unnerving than arguments. I lower my eyes slowly to meet her frosty gaze.

"I see." Grandmama says icily. "And why, in heaven's name, not?"

I open my mouth to respond, but no words come. Fear builds up in my throat, rendering me speechless.

Suddenly, a sharp _smack!_ echoes from the window behind Grandmama, making me jump. Grandmama ignores the sound, but I glance up in time to see a second pebble being lobbed at the glass. Kartik. I sigh in relief. He's here, listening, within reach. I feel as though a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

"Well?" Grandmama snaps. "Your reasons? Assuming you have them, of course."

"I do not wish to have a season," I start slowly. "because I already have a suitor." Grandmama blinks in bewilderment. "He has proposed marriage. And I have accepted."

Silence. Then—

"Who?" Grandmama asks, her voice deadly.

I hesitate. "M-Mr. Kartik."

"Our old coachman?" Grandmama's eyes flash. I flinch.

"Y-Yes."

I hold my breath in fear. Grandmama sits in her chair, nostrils flared, breathing deeply. I feel my heart fluttering nervously again. "Grandmama?"

"Absolutely not." She breathes, barely moving her clenched lips.

"Grandmama, please—"

"I said absolutely not!" she says, her voice rising considerably. I shrink away from her in my seat. "Do you have _any_ idea what that would do to us if you married that- that _Indian?_"

"Grandmama!" I stand. She follows me. "He is _not_ just an Indian!"

"Then what is he?" Grandmama asks. "What can he offer you, Gemma, that no _acceptable_ gentleman can? What made you choose this…servant over a suitor with the stature of Simon Middleton? Why throw away everything you've ever known for this one man? Mr. Kartik has no status in society. He does not deserve you."

"He may not have status, but he does have me!" I say angrily.

Grandmama looks shocked. Too late, I realize what she has, rightly, inferred from my statement.

"Grandmama—"

"So that's why." She interrupts, clutching a chair tightly for support. "He's compromised your virtue, _ruined_ you, and you are to marry him because of it."

"No, Grandmama." I shake my head fervently. "Mr. Kartik is far too much of a gentleman for that." Grandmama snorts in disbelief. "You may laugh, but it is true. I only meant that he understands me, and that I truly care for him."

"You are but a girl." Grandmama scoffs. "You don't know what you are saying."

"As of last night, I am a woman." I remind her softly.

"Gemma Doyle," Grandmama walks towards me. I hold my ground. "one day as a woman does not grant you the ability to understand the ways of society. No matter what you say, I refuse to permit this marriage." She glares at me. "I would think my granddaughter would aspire to be more than a common _harlot_. You will ruin this family."

Anger sparks within me, igniting the magic. I force it down, afraid of the consequences of using magic on my grandmother. It writhes irately within me, eagerly at the ready should I need it. I stare up at Grandmama defiantly.

"Even if I was a bleeding harlot, I couldn't _possibly_ ruin this family any more than it has been already." I spit, each word rising in volume. Grandmama looks as if I've slapped her.

"Gemma!"

"It's true!" Tears threaten to fall, but I push them back. "This family has been ruined ever since Mother died, since Father developed consumption. Since we came to England at all! How can my marrying Mr. Kartik make it any worse?"

"Because I have worked to cover those…events so that we can live our lives without scandal!" Grandmama barks at me. "That is something that you do not seem to understand."

"I understand more than you think." I reply. "I understand that a life of infinite deceit and a marriage without affection is not for me. I cannot live happily like that! The life I have chosen, with Mr. Kartik, is the life that I want."

Grandmama closes her eyes impatiently. "Gemma, think of your reputation—"

"I don't care about my bloody reputation!" I shout. Grandmama's mouth opens in astonishment, but I am beyond caring. "That is what I want to avoid! I want to live by my _own_ beliefs! I want to think for myself."

"It is not a lady's place to think for herself." Grandmama says. I could slap her for it.

"And why not?" I challenge. "Why can't I have my own thoughts? I was gifted with a brain of my own; surely it is an insult to God who gave it to me to simply not use it."

"Is it your ambition to vex me to death?" Grandmama exclaims, rubbing her temples.

"No, Grandmama." I answer, turning away. "My ambition is to be my own woman."

"Gemma, if you marry Mr. Kartik, you will bring scandal to this family that we may never recover from." Grandmama says in exasperation. "I _cannot_ let that happen!"

"It will not be a scandal if I have your approval." I say, glaring at her over my shoulder.

She looks at me suspiciously. "You will continue with your plans if you don't receive my consent?"

I stare hard at her. "Yes."

Grandmama collapses into a chair, covering her face with her hands. "You would disgrace your family so easily?" She asks, blinking up at me from behind her fingers.

"I do not wish to disgrace the family. I only want to live my own life." I sigh. "I can leave the country, if it helps. But I will marry Mr. Kartik, Grandmama. I cannot live the life of a proper lady, with a husband fond of nothing but his position."

Grandmama hides her face in her hands again. For a moment, nothing moves, the only sound coming from the wind-rattled windows. Finally, Grandmama lifts her gaze to mine.

"Gemma, I will not give my consent now." She says coldly. "Give me time to think about this. It is a…difficult decision."

"Yes, Grandmama." I reply. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me just yet." She says softly. Then, louder, "I wish to meet with Mr. Kartik. Can you arrange it?"

"He is here now." I answer. Grandmama lifts her eyebrow. "Would you like me to get him?" Grandmama nods, and I am dismissed.

I walk to the door, uncertain where I will find Kartik. Outside, the wind whips at the trees, bending them and sending leaves flying. Immediately, wisps of my fiery hair come free of their pins, swirling about my head like Gorgon's snakes.

"Kartik?" I call, eager to be out of the wind and foreboding rain.

A pair of arms snake around my waist. "Yes?"

I twist around to face Kartik. "Is it so hard to simply _answer_ when I call for you?"

"No," he replies, kissing me sweetly. "but it's far more fun to sneak up on you."

"How charming." I laugh. "But come in. Grandmama wants to speak with you."

"I know." Kartik replies. I lead him inside to the sitting room door, then stop.

"Wait," I say, pulling out my ring from my bodice. Kartik watches with a small smile as I slide the ring off of the chain and onto my finger. I look up at him. "Ready?"

"Of course." He replies, and I push my way into the parlor. Grandmama looks up at the sound of the door opening, and, seeing us, frowns slightly.

"Grandmama," I say, gesturing behind me. "you remember Mr. Kartik. Mr. Kartik, my grandmother, Mrs. Doyle."

"Good afternoon, miss." Kartik says politely, playing the part of the mannerly suitor. I fight back a laugh.

"Good afternoon." Grandmama returns in a voice like ice. She eyes Kartik guardedly. "Please. Sit."

Kartik and I oblige, dropping into two separate armchairs. I fold my hands carefully in my lap, and Grandmama's gaze falls on my ring. Her eyes harden.

"I hear you are pursuing my granddaughter." Grandmama barks at Kartik, who nods. Before he can respond, however, Grandmama continues. "Why?"

Kartik looks surprised. "Because I—"

"—want her inheritance?" Grandmama cuts him off, arching an eyebrow menacingly.

"_Grandmama!_" I hiss, horrified at her blatant incivility.

She turns to look at me coolly. "I believe I have a right to ask that. It is, after all, _my_ dowry." Grandmama faces Kartik. "Well?"

"I can assure you, miss, that I am not after Miss Doyle's inheritance." Kartik promises, the epitome of wide-eyed innocence. "I pursue her for her person, and nothing more."

Grandmama snorts, glaring at Kartik and me. "And I can assure _you_, Mr. Kartik, that I will not stand for lies." I fight back a laugh at the irony of her words. "I will not permit this marriage if so much of a whisper of deceit reaches my ears. Am I understood?" Kartik and I nod apprehensively, afraid that she's only just begun. "Gemma, I want you to remain in this house for today. And please see Mr. Kartik to the door." Grandmama stands, still glowering, and walks stiffly out of the sitting room.

Kartik and I sit in bemused silence. After a moment, Kartik looks over at me.

"Does that mean we have her consent?" He asks, reaching for my hand.

I shake my head with a sigh. "No. It only means that the battle has begun." Kartik moans softly. I smile grimly at him. "Come. Before she returns."

We leave the sitting room, watching out for any sign of Grandmama or Mrs. Jones. No one is around, so we walk cautiously to the door. Standing outside, I kiss Kartik in the light rainfall.

"Meet me in my room." I whisper, and Kartik nods. With another quick kiss, I turn back inside and run upstairs. I walk into my room and quickly close the door behind me, eager to be alone with Kartik. Before I am halfway across the room to the window, Kartik emerges from outside, his hair glistening from the misty rain. A smile spreads across his face as I hurl myself into his arms.

"Hello to you, too." Kartik chuckles into my hair.

"I'm sorry." I say, letting go of him and clutching his hand.

"Don't apologize." Kartik pulls me to the bed. I snuggle into his frame with a comfortable sigh. Kartik's hands toy with my hair, and my fingers trace circles in his chest. We lie there for a while, listening to the light patter of the rain and to each other's lazy breathing, content for now to remain in our easy silence together.

"Your grandmother was hardly as bad as you predicted." Kartik remarks eventually.

"She's only just begun to fight." I reply dismally. "Give her a few days. Then we'll have real trouble."

"Even so," Kartik runs his hand over my side. I shiver in delight. "she knows now. That's half the battle done."

I laugh humorlessly. "_That_ was only the warning shot. There is so much more to come."

"Honestly, Gemma. You're quite the pessimist." Kartik says teasingly, and I laugh with him. His hands come up to wrap around my waist to pull me closer. "I miss this." He says, nuzzling my neck.

I kiss his jaw.

"Being alone with you." Kartik answers with a devious smile that makes my heart melt.

"I do, too." I rest my head on his chest.

"Soon we'll be able to do this freely." Kartik sighs, and I hear the longing that I feel in his voice.

"Very soon." I agree. Kartik kisses me gently. "I wish you could stay here with me." I tell him regretfully.

"As do I, Gemma." Kartik murmurs. "But we'll be back at Spence soon enough."

I grin happily. "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait to return."

Kartik chuckles and covers my mouth with his. "I can't, either." He whispers through my lips. "But I must be going." I try to protest, but he silences me with another kiss. "Your grandmother may come in here at any minute. I cannot be here when she does."

"Fine." I groan, rolling over to face the other wall. "Go."

Kartik wraps me in his arms again and warms my neck with his kisses. "I'll be back later. I promise." I feel his weight shift. "Come visit me in the stables."

"Alright," I turn my head to look at him. "when Grandmama lets me out of the house."

"Thank you." Kartik whispers. He dips his head down to kiss me, then swiftly brushes his lips against the skin exposed by my dress. I gasp quietly, but Kartik is already heading for my window. He swings one leg over the sill and turns to me, a wicked gleam in his eyes. "The stables, Gemma. Don't forget."

And with that, he's gone, leaving me with a fierce desire for the sights of the stables.

**End of Gemma/Grandmama smackdown chapter! It's going to keep going, just not as blatantly as this was. I hope it lived up to your expectations. If it didn't, review and tell me how much I suck. :)**

**OH MY GOODNESS. It's almost Arbor Day!! That's exciting. But only because Kartik's a tree. A hot Indian gypsie tree. Tehehe**

**Pleeeeease review. Or else...Grandmama will walk in on Gemma and Kartik being -indecent- and suddenly develope Sweeney Todd-like habits.**

**Is excited for Arbor Day,**

**'Image (Yes, I changed it again. Sorry, I have commitment issues. lol)**


	12. Chapter 12: Heritage

**...Alright, so last chapter wasn't too good. But that's my fault, because it wasn't what you were expecting. So, sorry about that. Really. Hope this one makes up for it!**

**Disclaimer: I can only wish I was Libba Bray, and therefore own these amazing characters. But I don't. (Any dialogue/words used from TSFT can be found on pages 810-816.)**

A few days later, I sit alone in a carriage on my way to Spence. I am fast approaching the woods that give way to my former school, and in my opinion, we can't arrive soon enough. The late-spring weather is positively suffocating, despite the breeze drifting through the windows.

I lean back in my seat grumpily. The weather isn't the only thing bothering me. Just last night, I dreamt of Miss Jacqueline Foxworthy again. This time, she's acted as though I wasn't there at all, no matter what I had done to attract her attention. But her disregard of my presence had given me the chance to take in her ratty appearance as she worked to haul away debris. Several cuts and bruises had marred her dirt and blood-caked skin. Her eyes were dead, completely devoid of any life they once had. She is nothing more than the mere echo of a girl.

I had woken in a fit of fright, and the troubling memory of my nightmare had plagued me through the early hours until I had fallen back into a restless sleep. In the morning, when I'd told Kartik of my nightmare, he'd promised to help me find the meaning of it.

Not that we hadn't been trying for the past few days. In addition to the lengthy conversations between Kartik and myself, Fee has been trying to convince me of Haresh's guilt in her carefully coded letters, as I was reluctant to blame him without cause. Then, she reminded me of the centaur's past habits, the thought that had escaped me that night in Spence: the habit of stealing humans from the real world. This realization had placed all doubt out of my mind, and Kartik's, as well.

I sigh. Kartik is another issue troubling me. In truth, he's not the source of trouble. Far from it; the stolen moments I've had with Kartik these past few days are the rays of light buried in the somber moments at home. No, the real issue is Grandmama and her attitude towards him. She is the only one in my family yet unable to agree to my engagement. Tom, after the initial and predictable spout of denial, eventually came to admit that he should have seen this coming, before escaping to his club. Even Father has accepted my decision and put his haunting memories of Kartik behind him, which means more to me than he will ever know.

Grandmama, on the other hand, still blames Kartik for Father's illness. No matter what I or my father say, she holds fast to her unfair prejudice, and continuously pesters me about calling off my engagement.

But so far, I've stood firm, and my plans to marry Kartik have gone untouched. Our engagement has been officially announced, and skeptic gossips are already at work, spreading word of pregnancy, which I stubbornly deny at every opportunity. Many other people question my sanity behind closed doors, which I can only laugh at, though which Grandmama seems to find particularly horrific.

I shake my head to rid it of my gloomy thoughts just as the carriage breaks through the last of many lines of trees, and Spence comes into view. I gaze up at the stone walls stretching high above, a sense of homecoming washing over me.

"We're here, miss." The driver calls to me as we stop in front of the doors. I climb down from the carriage and walk to the door, banging hard on the knocker.

"Ah, Miss Doyle!" the old housekeeper grins crookedly at me as she swings the doors wide. "We've been expectin' oo. Cumin, cumin. Oo are the firs' guest 'o arrive." She turns to the driver standing in the foyer with my bags. "Leave those there." He obeys, and Brigid turns to face me again. "Oo will be stayin' in your ol' room. Follow me."

I pay and thank the driver quickly before trotting after Brigid. We ascend the stairs silently, with Brigid concentrating on her steps and me taking in my familiar surroundings.

"Dinner is at the usuawl time." Brigid says when we reach my door. I see her eyes trailing down towards my hand and the ring on it. "I'll leave oo to freshin up."

"Yes, thank you." I close the door as Brigid returns downstairs. The room is exactly as I had left it: clean and empty. I stride over to the window and look outside, searching the nearby trees for any sign of Kartik. Nothing moves, except for the stray branch or leaf bending to the breezy wind. After a few minutes of searching, I give up and walk to my trunk to change out of my traveling clothes for dinner.

Later, I descend the stairs to find the other students clustered at the bottom. As I approach the group, I hear many exclamations of _"She's coming!"_, and see guilty smiles flashed in my direction. Splendid. Not even five minutes at Spence, and already gossip flies.

"Miss Doyle!" a voice calls from behind me, and I turn to see Mrs. Nightwing approaching. "How wonderful to see you."

"And you, Mrs. Nightwing." I reply, smiling politely.

The young students all scamper into the dining hall at the sight of their nearing headmistress. Mrs. Nightwing walks towards me. "I hear that I owe congratulations. Word of your engagement has preceded your arrival." She says, her eyes drifting to my ring.

"Thank you." I say with another smile.

"Your welcome." Mrs. Nightwing looks around keenly, searching for eavesdroppers. Satisfied that we are alone, she leans towards me and drops her voice to a whisper. "You're sure that he can be trusted? He _is_ a former member of the Rakshana."

"Quite sure." I answer, letting my smile fall. "Now if you'll excuse me—"

"Miss Doyle, I meant no harm." Mrs. Nightwing apologizes. "But the engagement of a High Priestess is not something to be taken lightly. The realms, and the Order, need you yet."

I sigh. "Thank you for your concern, Mrs. Nightwing. I am sorry for being so short with you." I look up at my former headmistress. "I am, understandably, under quite a bit of stress."

"Indeed." Mrs. Nightwing agrees. She turns to enter the dining room.

"Mrs. Nightwing, I need your help." I blurt out rashly.

Mrs. Nightwing stops and looks back at me. "And what do you need my help for?"

"The realms." I answer frankly. She blushes.

"I would not be of much service to you, Miss Doyle." She murmurs. "The magic did not hold in me. I am unable to enter the realms."

"Yes, but you can watch over them for me, from here." I correct. My headmistress still looks unsure. "Please?" After a long pause, Mrs. Nightwing nods. I smile gratefully. "Thank you, Mrs. Nightwing."

"Lillian." She says quietly, smoothing her skirt unnecessarily.

"Lillian." I repeat, staring at the floor.

"Yes, well, dinner should be served by now, Gemma." Mrs. Nightwing says suddenly, back to her usual intimidating manner. "I'm sure you are famished after your trip."

Dinner passes in the uneventful manner I had grown accustomed to during my time at Spence. The only difference now is that I am no longer a student, and therefore I've become an exciting new specimen for the other girls to scrutinize. They are filled with endless questions, most of which are easy enough to answer, such as how many teas I've attended since my debut (seven, all of them tedious in their own gruesome way). Then they want to see my ring, hear Kartik's name, and listen to any plans for the wedding. Soon, I am utterly sick of my own voice.

Finally, the talk turns to Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding tomorrow, and I am freed of examination. For the most part, I listen to the talk around me, answering when questioned and occasionally putting in my own thoughts, all the while waiting patiently for the meal to end. When it does, I escape quickly to my room to avoid further scrutiny.

I close my bedroom door behind me with a grateful sigh. I appear to be alone, yet I am wise to Kartik's habit of hiding. But after searching the entire room for him, Kartik is still nowhere to be found. I fall back onto the bed, not even bothering to dress.

Staring up at the ceiling, I let my mind wander to Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding. No doubt Fee will be taking mental notes for when we plan my own ceremony. I wish Kartik would come to see it for himself, but he refuses, and so far no amount of persuasion on my part has been able to convince him.

A rustling from outside attracts my attention. I sit up and look to the window in time to see Kartik crawl through it. He walks towards me, and I smile brightly up at him.

"Hello," Kartik whispers, bending down to kiss me.

"Hello," I reply though his warm lips, patting the empty space next to me. "Sit."

Kartik grins and crawls onto the bed. I lean back onto the pillows so that his frame towers over me and smile coyly. Kartik's lips claim mine in another kiss. I lose track of everything, focusing only on his lips on mine. Before I can completely give myself over to him, though, Kartik pulls away with a chuckle.

"No fair." I protest, pouting teasingly.

"What's not fair," Kartik murmurs softly. "is how much I want to give myself to you."

"Then why don't you?" I ask, fingering the buttons of his shirt longingly.

"Because, Gemma," His eyes glitter with amusement. "what fun would that be for you on our wedding night?"

"Mmm…" I mumble distractedly. "Our wedding night. That's fast approaching."

"Yes." Kartik agrees into my neck.

"We really should start preparing for the wedding." I muse aloud. Kartik nods. "Actually, I was thinking of that earlier." I look for Kartik's reaction. He simply smiles and looks back.

"And what were you thinking?" He asks innocently.

"I thought that we shouldn't waste any time to start planning." I say, forcing myself to sound falsely offhand. "Why don't we start tomorrow, at Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding? We could go, together."

"No, Gemma." Kartik says gently, yet resolutely.

"But why?" I whine, genuinely pouting now. "We will have a fabulous time, Kartik."

"Gemma, I've told you before. I will not go to this wedding with you." Kartik says in a tone not unlike that of an adult explaining a simple matter to a rather dull child.

"That's not a reason!" I protest in annoyance.

"I do not need a reason. I simply do not wish to go."

I turn away grumpily, crossing my arms over my chest. "Is it because you don't want to be seen with me?" I ask my nightstand, knowing how untrue it is, but thinking it anyway.

"Of course not." Kartik answers softly, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"Then _why_, Kartik?" I feel the frustration I've bottled up inside me threatening to spill over. I sit up and swing my legs over the edge of the bed, still not looking at Kartik.

"Because, Gemma." Kartik says bitterly. "No sane person wants an _Indian_ to ruin their perfect British wedding. It's unsightly."

"_I_ want you there." I stand and march irritably to the door. "Isn't that enough?"

"It's not your wedding, Gem."

"And I won't _have_ a wedding unless you start acting like a fiancé!" I hiss. I hear the creaking of bedsprings as Kartik leaps to his feet behind me.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Kartik's low voice is a mixture of anger and distress.

"What it means," I spin around to glare at Kartik frostily. "is that Grandmama will not let us marry unless we act like a _normal_ couple and go out in public with each other." I stop to concentrate on holding back my sobs. Kartik watches me for a moment, then sighs in defeat.

"Come here." He says, opening his arms wide. I'm sorely tempted to go to him, but I hold my ground. Kartik sighs again. "Please?" Only partially reluctantly, I trudge across my floor and into Kartik's inviting hold. We stand at the window, and I let the gentle breeze drifting through it cool my anger-heated face.

"Gemma, of course I want to be seen with you." Kartik murmurs into my hair. "But I am not the proper English gentleman that you are expected to marry." He hesitates. "I am afraid of losing you to that expectation. And I am afraid of losing myself."

I know this conversation; we've had part of it before. But now a whole new chapter of the story has developed, and I do not entirely understand it, though I know I must, for Kartik's sake. I lift my face to his. "You will never lose me, Kartik." I assure him softly. "But I am confused. How you will you lose yourself by going to a _wedding_?"

"Not just a wedding." Kartik corrects, shaking his head. "A British wedding, one that my future wife is using to help plan our own ceremony." I cock my head, puzzled. Kartik smiles sadly. "I may not have strong ties with my family, Gemma, but I do not _completely_ ignore my heritage. Amar made sure of it. I am Indian, and I must not forget that."

I lift a hand to cradle his cheek gently. "You are worried that our wedding will only have English customs?" I ask, and Kartik nods. I shake my head in disbelief. "Why would I ignore the desires of my fiancé?" Kartik blinks slowly at me, and I smile up at him. "Of course we will include Hindu traditions. I simply thought you would want a say in the rest of the wedding, as well."

"You are far more than I deserve, Gemma." Kartik breathes, a smile playing across his beautiful face. He kisses me gently. "I will escort you to this wedding tomorrow."

"Thank you." I say happily, kissing him back.

Kartik chuckles lightly. "Was there anything else you wanted to discuss?" He asks, dark eyes smoldering. His hands travel upwards to rest on my breasts.

"Not at present." I answer playfully, fingering his shirt.

"Good." Kartik replies, bringing my face gently to his. "I love you." He whispers into my neck as his able hands work at undoing the fastens of my dress and corset. He pulls the fabric over my head, and I feel his warm touch tracing my curves.

"I love you, too." I whisper. Kartik presses me against the wall, his hands on either side of my face. He trails his lips over my shoulders, my neck, my chest, drawing a gasp from my parted lips. A yearning for him rushes through me. It's been so long since we've been alone like this, and I want him. Badly.

Kartik seems to feel the same. His mouth warms my skin, his hands outline my form. I tangle our fingers together, turning my head to the side so his lips can brush against my neck. A sinful shiver cascades down my body.

"Gemma," Kartik murmurs huskily. I cover my mouth with his, silencing him. He's only said my name, but the passion behind it is enough. Our bodies come together in perfect harmony, dark and light skin blending together in a whirling dance of affection.

The next morning brings with it a beautiful late-spring day. I lie still for some time, feeling quite content in Kartik's embrace, with the soft, flower-scented breeze drifting through the cracks in the window cooling my skin. After a few moments, I reluctantly drag myself out of bed to change for the wedding.

Once dressed, I sit unwillingly at my mirror, knowing the amount of work it will require to tame my thoroughly tousled hair. Kartik lies in bed and watches me, his muscular body a very distracting image in the mirror indeed. More than once, my lack of attention on my own reflection forces me to start on my hair all over again.

Once I manage to trap my curls in their pins, I turn to Kartik with an overstated flourish, fanning my skirt around me.

"What do you think?" I ask, gesturing grandly at my dress. "Am I presentable?"

"Quite." Kartik answers, his eyes lingering for a moment on my exaggerated bust due to my corset.

"Thank you." I reply, smiling brazenly. "I should go and meet Fee. She'll be here any minute. Meet me downstairs once your dressed. I'll tell Brigid to expect you."

Kartik nods, and I give him a quick kiss before skipping down the stairs into the foyer to greet Felicity and to pass on my message to Brigid. Fee arrives within minutes. We hug tightly and walk outside, trading stories and picking wildflowers.

Her tales of Paris are, by far, much more entertaining than mine.

"Think of it, Gemma- never to wear a petticoat and corset again." Fee says after her detailed explanation of the trousers she vows to have fashioned in Paris. "_That_ is freedom."

"You shall be the talk of the town." I say, shaking my head.

"Let them talk. It's my life to live, not theirs." Fee replies boldly. "I've my inheritance now. And perhaps, in time and with my influence, ladies in trousers shall be all the rage."

I laugh and finger my own skirts. I'm not brave enough to let them go, but I know that Fee shall wear her trousers with aplomb, and tell her so. In response, Felicity smiles impishly and pitches a mass of flowers in my face. A riotous war of flying petals ensues, in which both of us wind up completely covered in flowers.

"Will you behave?" I demand with a chuckle when nearly all of our petals lay strewn about the lawn.

"Only if you will." Fee giggles, flicking another rose at me, which I catch. "Truce?"

"Truce." I reply, bending to pick flowers out of my dress and hair. A voice calls my name, and I look up to see Brigid waving me to her. I seize Felicity and run towards the school, still giggling madly.

"Mr. Kartik Ishana to see oo, Miss Doyle." Brigid says when I reach her, a vaguely confused look in her eyes.

"Thank you, Brigid." I respond, smiling at Kartik as he moves into the light.

"Good afternoon, Miss Doyle." Kartik returns my smile. "You look lovely today." I lower my eyes modestly to hide my laughter from the ever-present Brigid. He offers me his arm. "Would you care for a walk?"

"Yes, thank you. That would be lovely." I take his arm and turn to Fee, barely holding in my laughter now. "Will you join us, Miss Worthington?"

"Oh, alright." Felicity huffs without a trace of refinement, and follows us into the gardens.

* * *

Mademoiselle LeFarge's wedding is absolutely perfect. She herself is a vision in a sapphire blue crepe suit that is completely fitting for such a simple ceremony. Inspector Kent's eyes light up at the sight of her, and I find that I am glad that they found each other. I sit near the back of the chapel, with Kartik sitting on my right and Felicity on my left, her gray eyes taking in everything. At the altar, Mademoiselle LeFarge and Inspector Kent stand before Reverend Waite as he warbles on in his deadpan voice. But even that can't take away the simple beauty of the wedding.

At the end of the ceremony, the inspector leads his new bride to their waiting carriage, waving happily at their guests while Brigid bawls into her worn handkerchief. But they do not escape completely unscathed. As the carriage moves away, my fellow students and I chase after it, showering them with orange blossoms, laughing and crying, "Good luck!"

When the carriage drives out of view, I make my way back to the chapel, arm-in-arm with Fee, our hands covered with the sweet-smelling scent of the blossoms, giggling carelessly and reviewing the ceremony.

"You know, Gemma, I think you were right." Fee broods aloud. "A simple wedding _is_ quite lovely."

"Thank you." I reply. "I think so, too." Kartik comes into view, standing in the courtyard of the chapel, waiting for me. Nearby, a cluster of schoolgirls gawk at him, but he pays them no mind. I grin in satisfaction and walk to his side, sliding my arm in his.

"Thank you for coming." I murmur into his ear, smiling sweetly at the stunned schoolgirls.

He turns his face to look at me. "Thank you for bringing me."

"Enough chatter." Fee barks playfully, pushing me towards the school. I drag Kartik along with us. "We have much to discuss! Weddings don't plan themselves, you know!"

**Wedding one down. Gemma/Kartik wedding coming...eventually. Don't hold your breath, though. I think I might save that for the epilogue. Because I have other stuff to write about before that happens...hint hint.**

**Please review! Less reviews seriously affect my mood. Ask anyone who knows me. If you don't review...I'll weld Kartik's pants to his body so he can never take them off. And I'll make them titanium so you can't cut it. See if I don't. So you better review, if you ever want to read my version of pantsless Kartik again. -evil laugh-**

**Has a really bad sunburn,**

**'Image**


	13. Chapter 13: Vision

**Hehehe sorry for the delay. Busted wrist makes it hard to write. And, to be honest, it didn't seem like any of you guys were reading until sometime around day 13. But now I'm quite content with your reviews, and on top of that, I might find myself drowned in pudding if I don't post, soooo...Chapter 13!!**

**Disclaimer: I'm not Libba Bray, but I AM writing a research paper on her. hahaha**

"Miss Worthington has arrived, miss."

I look up at the maid from my position near the fireplace in my grandmother's parlor.

"Thank you, Emily." I say, and she retreats into the kitchens without so much as a smile, where I don't doubt she'll spread stories of my atrocious behavior, yet again, as she has done since my father announced my engagement to Kartik, when her reception towards me turned curiously chilly.

Shaking my head, I get up from my chair and walk to the front door, stopping to say goodbye to my also rather cold grandmother in the library. It's been several weeks since the wedding at Spence, and Felicity is back in London on vacation. We are to see Ann's stage debut in _The Merry Maidens_, and tonight I will stay with Fee at her house.

"Come along, Gemma!" My excitable friend calls loudly from a carriage parked at my front gate. "We don't want to be late."

"And we won't be." I assure her with a chuckle as the coachman closes the door behind me.

"Isn't it exciting?" Fee gushes once I'm settled. "Our Ann, onstage! I simply can't believe it."

"I can." I laugh as the carriage starts forward with an almighty lurch. "She's always had quite a flair for the dramatic."

Felicity smiles along with me, and we chat animatedly for the rest of the ride, waiting impatiently for our arrival at the Gaiety theatre. I continuously look out at the passing city, willing the carriage to go faster.

"Really, Gemma," Fee laughs as I stick my head out the window yet again. "losing your head to a passing carriage won't get us to the theatre any sooner."

"I know, but I'm far too anxious to sit." I groan, settling back into my seat.

Fee giggles. "You said Kartik is to attend tonight's performance as well, yes?" She inquires with a meaningful smile playing at the corners of her lips.

"Yes," I answer, fixing my crooked glove. "he is meeting us at the theatre." I sigh. "Grandmama is far from happy about it."

"Ah." Fee says, and leaves it at that.

Finally, our cab pulls up to the Gaiety. I step down from the carriage and look around for Kartik. He is standing alone near the doors to the theatre, his brown eyes scanning the passing crowd, looking absolutely breathtaking in his dark suit. For a moment, all I can do is stand and gawk at the glorious figure that is my fiancé. But then I gather my senses and tow Felicity in Kartik's direction, dodging ladies in richly embroidered dresses and men carrying ornate walking canes.

"Good evening, Miss Doyle, Miss Worthington." Kartik says, nodding at Felicity and lifting my hand to his lips, kissing it gently.

"Good evening." Fee and I return his greeting together. Several nearby women turn to raise their eyebrows at us, clearly wondering what business two well-bred young ladies such as ourselves could possibly have speaking with an Indian. Kartik releases my hand, and one of the ladies spots the ring glittering on my finger. She whispers scandalously to her friend behind gloved hands. Her friend's eyes dart in my direction in shock, then away again when she sees me looking.

"Shall we?" Kartik asks politely, offering me his arm and ignoring the strangers around us.

"Let's." I reply, linking arms with him and walking past the gossiping ladies into the theatre, with Fee beside us the whole way, talking endlessly about the thrill of watching Ann's first performance. We take our seats among the other curious audience members and wait for the show to begin.

"I wonder how Ann is feeling." Fee whispers to me over the steady hum of hushed conversation around us.

"She's probably terribly frightened." I answer truthfully. "Not that she has a reason to be. I'm sure she'll be fantastic."

"Indeed." Fee says. Without another word, we turn to fix our anxious gazes on the curtain blocking our view of Ann.

"She'll calm down." Kartik whispers soothingly in my ear. "She's done harder things than this."

"True," I agree. We wait in silence for the show to start. Finally, the last guest takes his seat, and every head turns to the stage expectantly.

Right on cue, the curtain rises, the bright lighting illuminating the set. Five couples adorn the stage, and at the very center stands Ann, a carefully practiced smile frozen on her face. Before I can take in much else, however, the music starts, and Ann's dance partner, a tall, sandy-haired young man, gracefully whisks her away.

A breath I haven't realized I've been holding comes rushing out as I watch what was once a timid schoolgirl blossom into a confident actress. Ann twirls with such grace it makes me envious, and when she sings it is like a chorus of angels. A radiant smile lights up her face.

By the end of the play, I am left completely speechless. Ann is glowing with happiness as she is called forward for the final bow. Felicity and I cheer loudly, barely able to contain our enthusiasm, much to Kartik's amusement, and to the displeasure of everyone else. A spectacled man in front of us turns to glare, but we pay him no mind, being far too preoccupied with cheering on our friend. As Ann walks off the stage, I almost swear I see her wink in our direction.

"That was marvelous! I've never seen Ann so light on her feet." Felicity exclaims as everyone around us, including the man with his spectacles, stands up to leave. He gives us another scornful look, but we ignore him again.

"It was indeed." I reply as Kartik nods.

"Shall we go and greet London's newest star?" Felicity asks cheekily, standing. I rise from my own seat.

We push past the current of ladies and gentlemen heading back into the streets of London until we come to the door leading backstage. Fee pushes it open and steps boldly through it, with me and Kartik trailing behind like shadows.

"'Scuse me, miss," a tall, muscular stagehand says in a heavy accent when he catches sight of us. "but on'y actors are allow' back 'ere."

"We've been invited." Felicity lies smoothly, smiling in the way she uses to get whatever she wants. The stagehand cocks an eyebrow. "By one of the actresses, Ann Bradshaw. We are her old schoolmates, Felicity Worthington and Gemma Doyle."

The stagehand blinks suspiciously as us. "Does it look like I wus born yesterday, mum? Wha' would the admirawls' dau'er wan' wif an actress like Ann? She's nuttin' speciawl." He grins crookedly at Felicity. "_I_ could show oo sumthin' speciawl, if oo'd like."

Furious, Felicity draws herself up to her fullest height, a usually intimidating move rendered unsuccessful by the stagehand's own extraordinary length. Before Felicity can speak, however, a voice rings out from the dark behind the stagehand.

"Fee! Gemma! Oh, how wonderful to see you!" Ann comes out of the shadows, her plump face colored with heavy rouge and her hair piled high on her head.

"Ann, darling," Felicity steps forward, smirking at the now silent stagehand. "you were simply fantastic out there. Wasn't she, Gemma?"

"Indeed." I say from Kartik's side. Ann beams at us.

"Thank you. You are too kind." She pulls Fee farther backstage, motioning for Kartik and me to follow. "Come. You must meet everyone!"

Ann gives us the grand tour, showing us everything from the ticket booth to the dressing rooms, and introduces us to absolutely everyone, down to the last stagehand.

When we reach Charlie Smalls, the composer, he breaks off his conversation with a man who I recognize as Ann's dance partner and sweeps Ann into a tight embrace. Ann's partner glances at us, sees Felicity, and gives her figure a bold appraisal.

Fee raises an eyebrow, but the actor simply winks and walks pointedly into the shadows. Felicity, equally as pointedly, turns away. I smirk after the second man turned down by Felicity tonight, and wonder how they would react to learning of her inclination towards women.

"Here's my final maiden!" Charlie laughs in his American accent, releasing my blushing friend. "You were spectacular, Ann. A vision."

"Thank you, Charlie." Ann says, an adorable smile on her face. "You remember my friends, Misses Worthington and Doyle. And this is Miss Doyle's fiancé, Kartik—"

"Ishana." Kartik finishes for her, shaking Charlie's hand.

"Charlie Smalls, composer." Charlie quips with a gap-toothed grin. "Did you enjoy the show?"

"Oh, yes," Fee says enthusiastically. "it was fabulous."

"Thank you, thank you." Charlie chuckles with a mock bow. "But the congratulations really belongs to my maidens. It's them that do the stage work." He wraps his arm fondly around Ann's shoulders, making her blush again.

"Ann, you must be boiling!" Felicity fusses suddenly. "Why don't you go to change?"

"Wha—?" Ann starts, but stops short at Felicity's fierce stare. "Er- yes. Follow me. I'll talk to you later, Charlie." Ann walks down a long hallway just behind the composer, leading us past door after door. Finally, we stop at the last one, where a piece of paper bearing Ann's neat signature is pinned. Felicity and I walk in after Ann, leaving Kartik to stand outside.

I glance around me at the white-walled dressing room. There is a mirror, a stool, a screen, and a few chairs spread tidily about. Several bottles and boxes of what appear to be cosmetics are aligned precisely on a desk. A signed photo of Lily Trimble lays under a container of what appears to be face paint.

Optimistically, the room is colorless. Realistically, it's drab.

"So," Felicity begins once the door is closed, watching Ann's every move. I shake my head and settle down on one of the chairs. "Mr. Smalls seems quite charming."

"He is indeed." Ann sighs dreamily, loosening her dress. I raise my eyebrows at Fee, who smiles back craftily, which Ann does not miss. "We've worked together for several weeks now." She continues somewhat defensively as she disappears behind her changing screen. "We were bound to develop a bond."

Fee's eyebrows shoot up. "And what bond might that be?"

Ann pauses before re-emerging from behind the screen, freshly changed and red-cheeked under her many layers of rouge. Felicity smiles gleefully.

"Oh, Ann, you're blushing!" she laughs. I cough lightly into my gloved hand.

"N-no I'm not." Ann stutters as she sits down on her chair, the color in her cheeks darkening. "It's my m-makeup."

"Yes, of course." Fee agrees sarcastically, then smiles sweetly. "Ann, you know you can tell us anything. Is there something between you and Mr. Smalls? Anything at all?"

Ann takes a deep, steadying breath. "No, there is nothing between us. He has simply…expressed an interest." The flush on Ann's cheek is more prominent now than ever as she carefully scrubs her face free of its severe rouging.

"And how, pray tell, did he do that?" Fee pries. I roll my eyes at her rather blatant nosiness and at Ann's pitiful evasiveness.

"W-well, he…" Ann stops, her eyes pleading with Fee to spare her. But Felicity just stares back expectantly. Ann sighs. "He kissed me." She says in a voice so soft I'm not entirely sure I heard her at all.

"Pardon?" Fee asks eagerly.

"He kissed me." Ann repeats defiantly. "It was at last rehearsal. Everything had gone so well, he was thrilled, we were alone, and…he kissed me." She stares up at Felicity, as though daring her to laugh.

"I thought so." Fee says smugly, and we spend several minutes discussing Ann's budding relationship with Mr. Smalls before a loud, unladylike growl from my stomach reminds us of how famished we all are.

"Come to my apartment." Ann suggests. "It's nearby. We can celebrate."

"Sounds wonderful, Ann." I declare, standing again. "Shall we?"

Ann promptly leads us back into the hall, where Kartik awaits us, staring with slightly raised eyebrows at the raucous crowd of actors nearby. One of the actresses sees him looking and lets out a vaguely drunken whistle.

I grin and loop my arm through his. Kartik returns my smile and quickly brushes his lips against mine. I feel my grin expand and a blush creep over my cheeks as we follow Ann through the halls of the Gaiety. We leave the theatre slowly, stopped often by Ann's rather talkative new friends. Eventually, though, we manage to break out into the bustling London nightlife.

Felicity already stands at the street, trying to flag down a cab, laughing loudly in response to a joke I've missed. A driver pulls up in front of her. She steps up into the carriage, with Ann quickly following behind her. Kartik steers me after them, weaving through the throng of ladies and gentlemen standing between us and the hansom.

Suddenly, the familiar tingling sensation licks at my body, and the air in my lungs whooshes out in a great rush. I press my hand to my chest, wide-eyed and gasping for air. Several passersby turn to stare at me curiously. Kartik halts and looks at me, concern in his eyes.

"Gemma?" His voice is muddled, as if I am hearing him through a wall of water. The people around us seem to walk in slow motion. The scene in front of me swims, and I close my eyes against swirling city. My head reels dizzily as the full force of my vision kicks in.

A strange tugging sensations rips at my body, as if I'm being dragged through a lake. I open my eyes cautiously to see a blur of confusing images, each blending into the other so that nothing is comprehendible. I blink blearily until the swirl of color begins to slow, and I am able to make out my surroundings.

I stand in front of an intricate gate, gazing out at the bustling streets of London. Behind me, an impressive lawn stretches out in front of a large house in London's West End. I stride forward without a care in the world.

I turn and the scene changes. I cower in an alley, shrinking away from the large, bizarre silhouette that I distantly recognize as Haresh. A demented smirk distorts his features. I try to scream, but can't. The air is gone from my lungs. Fear clouds my mind, and I shut my eyes against the terrorizing being approaching me.

I open my eyes again to see the realms, a beautiful and terrifying sight. I feel all the peace of the world within me, but it is blocked by my own prominent fear of the peculiar beast dragging me forward.

I blink and I'm alone in the forest, leaning against a tree in exhaustion, pieces of rubbish strewn before me. The hem of my dress is frayed and dirtied. My hands ache from scratches gained from the rough bark of wood, and a large, angry scar stretches from my shoulder to my wrist. A single tear clears a path through the dirt on my face.

Everything dissolves, and I tremble before Haresh, his heartless eyes glaring at me. His heavy hands and hard hooves descend upon my tender skin, bruising me and drawing forth my tortured cries. He lifts his hoof for a final blow.

Another sickening whirl, and I find myself lying on the hard ground, clutching my knees to my chest and nursing a freshly bleeding wound on my ankle. Tears slide steadily down my face as the images of the family I have left behind swim before my eyes. Mother, father, brother, aunt…

The world around me changes once more, leaving me standing at the lake. Haresh leers down at me threateningly. I gasp as he steps forward.

"Careful, Priestess," he warns, watching with amusement as I raise my hand protectively. "You're not the only one with magic now."

Haresh lifts his hand as if to strike me. I take an instinctive step back, closing my eyes in anticipation of the impact, but nothing touches me. Instead, sound explodes around me, and I open my eyes to find myself back in busy London.

I turn my head frantically, half expecting to see Haresh advancing on me, dragging a sobbing Jacqueline behind him. But all I see is Felicity and Ann looking out at me from the carriage in alarm, and Kartik standing beside me, gripping my shoulders.

"Gemma?" He whispers, worry etched in his voice. My whole body shakes, and I fear I shall be sick. "Are you hurt? What did you see?"

I shake my head slightly. "Not here." I croak. After a pause, Kartik nods and hastily helps me into the carriage, climbing in after me.

"Where to, miss?" the cabbie calls down to us.

Ann recites her new address. "And hurry, please." She adds, glancing in my direction.

The carriage sets off with a jolt. My head still swims with the force of my whirlwind vision. I lean into Kartik, closing my eyes tightly, and he accepts my weight wordlessly. His strong arms wrap comfortingly around me as I sit in silence, trying not to remember the memory of Jacqueline Foxworthy's last moments in the real world, and her pitiful existence in the realms. A wave of nausea threatens to drown me.

"Gemma?" Felicity asks, leaning towards me. "What happened? Is everything alright?"

I shake my head against Kartik's shoulder.

"No, Fee." I whisper hoarsely. "Everything is terribly, terribly wrong. And it's all my fault."

**O dear, plot! Yay me? Do you like it? Hate it? Be sure to tell me what you think, because I really want to know how you feel about this!!**

**And because I think you might need motivation, here's reasons you should review: a) you are good people, b) it makes me insane when I think I suddenly suck at writing, c) my wrist hurts like crap and you could help me feel better, and d) Arbor day is this Friday and we should all celebrate our hot, Indian, former Rakshana, gypsy tree of All Souls. So, please review, while I research stuff about Libba Bray for our English paper. Wooot!**

**Got the best author in her whole class,**

**'Image**


	14. Author's Note

**Hey, guys. Sorry this isn't a chapter, but I'm having major computer problems. I can't even turn the bloody thing on. And my flash drive is, of course, broken. Just my luck. So please, please be patient with me while I try to figure this out; it might take a couple more days, since I'm twelve hours away from my computer visiting family in New Jersey (only for the weekend, though!).**

**I promise, I think this upcoming chapter is well worth the extended wait. And, as payment, I'm adding another -special- chapter right before the wedding (which, I've decided, will be the epilogue. Unless you want that to be a chapter itself, and THEN have an epilogue. It's up to you guys.)**

**Oh, and by the way, you guys are absolutely amazing for all of the reviews. I finally broke 20 for a single chapter! Keep them coming, please?**

**Again, I'm so, so, so, so, so sorry!!**

**'Image**


	15. Chapter 14: Gone

**I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so sorry about the delay. I just got my computer to turn on about five minutes ago, and my flashdrive is STILL broken, so I have to type this out by hand (I keep my fanfic on my laptop and transfer it to the home computer, since my laptop doesn't have internet access. Ugh.). So, because of that, there might be a few spelling errors, and if there are, please tell me, and I'll fix it.**

**So, belatedly, here's Chapter 14!!**

**Disclaimer: Although Libba Bray also has problems with deadlines, I am not her. Which is a shame.**

Several minutes later, the carriage pulls up to Ann's dreary apartment. Kartik jumps down first to help me from the cab, placing a supporting arm around my shoulders when I land unsteadily. With a fretful glance at me, Ann leads us through the dim hallway, the gray of the walls and the brown of the doors blurring together and making my head whirl until I fear I shall faint.

"Open the door, Ann, before Gemma falls." Felicity barks when we arrive at the correct door. I hear the scrape of a key and the squeaking door hinges before Kartik ushers me over the threshold. My head still spins from my blur of a vision, and I fall into Kartik, who catches me.

"Sit down, Gemma," Ann orders as she hurries to light the lamps.

I obey and lower myself carefully onto a nearby chair. Kartik bends low so that our eyes are level. Ann and Fee hover in the background, peering anxiously over Kartik's shoulder.

"Gemma," Kartik starts, "tell me. What did you see?"

I blink up at him through the lightheaded fog clouding my nearly crossed eyes. "I saw what happened to Jacqueline Foxworthy, after she was abducted. I felt everything she felt. It was such a strange vision, almost like...like I _was_her. I've never had one like it before." I stare around me without taking in a thing, the memories of my haunting vision reeling before my eyes. "It was horrible, Kartik. And then I was myself again, and Haresh...he--"

"He what?" Fee prompts eagerly when I stop.

"He threatened me." I shudder, thinking back to my bizarre and deeply troubling vision. Kartik's grip on my hand tenses. "He told me to be careful, that I'm not the only one with magic."

I fall silent again, watching the world around me come slowly into focus.

"But...I don't understand." Ann remarks, her brows furrowed. "You said it was _your_ fault. How?" I stare at her in disbelief.

"Because I gave Haresh magic, and now Jacqueline is in the realms, being tortured and forced to work as a slave!" Ann winces. I drop my head into my hand. "If I hadn't been so stupid, if I had gone ahead with the blasted alliance, this might not have happened. Jacqueline would be in the real world, with her family, like she's supposed to be. Stupid, stupid, _stupid!_" I rap my forehead angrily with my fist.

"Gemma, stop that this instant." Felicity chastises me stubbornly. "Haresh is an appalling creature. There is nothing you could have done to fix that."

"But I _gave_ him the magic!" I shout, still furious with myself. "I might as well have handed him the girl."

Ann steps forward. "Haresh may have acted horribly, Gemma, but what he did is his instinct. It was completely out of your control." she says quietly, comfortingly. "The creatures haven't had magic in years. There was bound to be some problems. It's no wonder Haresh got out of hand, and the fact that he's the only one causing us trouble is a miracle in itself. This is _not_ your fault."

I shake my head miserably. "It doesn't matter who's fault it is or isn't. What matters is that Jacqueline is trapped in the realms, and the magic is useless against Haresh because he has his own."

Felicity raises an eyebrow. "Who says the magic is useless?" she asks. I open my mouth to respond. "No, listen to me, Gemma. Haresh has magic, yes, but he is new to it. You have had your magic longer. You can control it better! A fight between the two of you would be to _your _advantage!"

"No." Kartik says harshly in a voice like a growl. I look up at him in surprise. "Gemma cannot fight Haresh alone. It would be suicide." My heart speeds nervously from somewhere in my throat.

"Stuff and nonsense." Fee sniffs, oblivious to my growing panic. "She has experience."

"Yes, but _he _doesn't." Kartik points out. Felicity bites her lip. "If he unleashes the magic for a fight, then there is a good chance he will lose control of it. Gemma wouldn't survive."

We all fall silent. Kartik's hand quivers in mine.

"So what do we do?" Ann asks in a small voice, gripping her arms.

"We go into the realms, and find Phlion." I answer, standing a bit unsteadily. Ann's eyes grow wide. "If we find Philon, there is a good chance we find Haresh."

"Gemma, this is madness." Kartik hisses, turning me to face him. I privately agree. "You cannot just go into the realms and find Haresh. For all we know, he's got an army of creatures at the ready. Gemma, _he will kill you_."

"What else can I do, Kartik?" I ask, though uncertainty has already established itself firmly in my mind. "I cannot simply stand here and let an innocent girl be tortured. That goes against everything I believe in."

Silence. "Fine." Kartik lets his arms fall, looking defeated. "But don't even think I'm leaving your side." I nod in agreement before turning to Felicity and Ann.

"When can you be ready to go to the realms?" I ask them. They look at each other.

"There's no time like the present." Ann replies, wringing her hands nervously. Fee nods.

"Alright, then." I say, stretching out a slightly trembling hand. My friends simply stare at it for a second. Then Kartik's fingers brush mine, followed by Felicity's, then Ann's. I close my eyes and concentrate. A gentle, tingling wave washes over me, and I open my eyes to see the door of light.

No one moves for a full minute. I bury my fear and step forward into the realms, the others falling into step behind me. After my eyes adjust, I look around cautiously, half expecting to be attacked on the spot. But everything is as I remember from out last visit: beautiful and serene, with the magic almost tangible in the air.

"Where to now, Gemma?" Fee asks quietly, appearing suddenly at my side.

"The forest." I say just as quietly. Fee nods and slips back to stand by Ann. Kartik quickly takes her place.

"You're sure this is what you want to do?" he asks.

"Yes." I reply, trying to reassure myself as well as Kartik.

"What if something happens?" he persists, sounding somewhat uneasy.

I don't know what to say to that, so I settle for taking his hand. He looks away.

"Then our world is in trouble, isn't it?" I reply, barely able to contain the fresh surge of fear that these words bring.

Kartik does not say another word as we make our way to the river. I stare straight ahead, looking out for Gorgon or her ship on the glass-smooth water. Just as we reach the shoreline, the boat rounds the corner. I wave Gorgon over to us.

"Most High," Gorgon greets softly as she lowers the plank, "welcome."

"Thank you." I say, forcing myself to act as if nothing is amiss, and falling miserably short of successful. I follow Kartik onto the boat slowly.

The many eyes of Gorgon's snakes track my movements as I approach. "Where would you like to go, Most High?" she asks.

"The forest, if you please, Gorgon. I...I rather fancy a talk with Philon." I say, and Gorgon sets off, the great snakes atop her head writhing about her stoic face. Ann and Felicity wander off to the railing, but Kartik remains glued to my side. After a moment, I step up to Gorgon, watching her steady hands steer the boat.

"Gorgon," I start, and she turns her eyes to me, "have you noticed anything..._different_ lately? Since I bound the magic, I mean."

"No, Most High." Gorgon answers. "Everything is as it was."

"So no one's been acting peculiar?" I press. Gorgon shakes her head slowly.

"Not that I have seen." she says, peering in at me. "Why so interested, Most High?"

I cough to hide my nerves. "I suppose I'm just worried. Wanted o be sure everything is going smoothly since I bound the magic, you know."

"Yes," Gorgon hisses, turning her eyes slowly back to the river, "of course."

I hastily walk away to the other end of the boat before she grows any more suspicious. As much trust as I have in the gorgon, I cannot risk being overheard by Haresh, and thus endangering Jacqueline even further. Kartik follows me across the boat.

We watch the passing trees silently. I find myself leaning over the rail slightly, searching for any sign of Miss Foxworthy in the undergrowth, but there is nothing. After a few moments, I stand straight again with a sigh. The ship passes through the golden waterfall, but for once, I do not leave the glittering flakes on my skin. Instead, I brush them off impatiently, keeping my eyes trained to the trees.

"We are her, Most High." Gorgon calls as the boat approaches the forest. Felicity and Ann join Kartik and me at the plank. Kartik leads us down to the land and into the trees, and I turn to nod our thanks to Gorgon before disappearing into the foliage. I hear the lapping of water against wood, and I know Gorgon is gone. Everyone turns to me.

"Come on," I sigh, leading my friends through the muted light, deeper and deeper into the forest. We stick to the path to the clearing, my nerves buzzing more and more erratically with each step. Felicity and Ann whisper quietly to each other behind me, yet I am silent, struggling to come up with a plan. But as we step past the last tree, my mind is still hopelessly blank.

After the subdued glow of the trees, the abrupt sunlight in the clearing practically blinds me. Once my eyes have adjusted, I quickly scan the area for Philon. The clearing is nearly empty, apart from a handful of forest folk scattered about, but Philon is not among them. The creatures stare up at me in surprise.

"Priestess. You've come back."

I turn to see Philon emerging through the trees, strange, catlike eyes fixed on me. Beside trots Neela, her new nervous gaze sweeping through the clearing. I bow courteously, ignoring Neela, and Philon returns the gesture.

"You wish to speak with me, Priestess?" Philon asks, nodding politely at my friends.

"Er--yes." I swallow. "Privately, if you please."

"Certainly." Philon turns and motions for Neela to stay. Kartik and I step after Philon. I feel his warm arm brush against mine, and for a brief moment, my nerves disappear.

Philon stops when we are out of easy hearing range of those in the clearing. My heart thumps painfully, for I still haven't come up with a plan. I feel Fee's inquisitive stare boring into the back of my head.

"Priestess?" Philon invites me to start with a careless wave.

I breathe deeply, trying to calm my frenzied nerves. "W-well, I've a serious matter to discuss...about Haresh."

"What about him?" Philon'svoice remains politely neutral.

"I've been having these dreams about him--visions, really." I babble. "Well, him and a girl. A human girl. Miss Jacqueline Foxworthy, late of London."

"A human?" Philon echoes skeptically, the careful diplomatic neutrality leaving his tone. "That is not possible, Priestess. I gave specific orders to Haresh to leave the mortal world be." I raise my eyebrow, but Philon shakes his head, already knowing what I am going to say. "With the death of Creostus, Haresh gained command of my centaurs." Philon explains. "He would not endanger his position again."

"Men in power do not always act honorably." Felicity growls from behind me, undoubtedly thinking of her father. But something else Philon had said catches my attention.

"Again?" I repeat, staring at Philon. "What do you mean by again?"

Philon closes his eyes wearily. "Just after you gave us the magic, Haresh voiced his desire for human slaves once more." I shudder. "I was reluctant to give my consent, for I knew it would destroy your trust in us, Priestess. Haresh did not agree."

"Of course not." Fee rumbles bitterly. Ann shushes her.

Philon continues without pausing. "He called me weak for it, claimed that I had been corrupted by you. Many agreed. Yet I was convinced that returning to the human world was not in our best interest. I banned Haresh and the other centaurs from entering your world. They were...displeased with me. A revolt was whispered about for some time, but no word of it has since reached my ears."

Everyone is silent. Philon's rather feline eyes open to gaze at me. I decide it is my turn to preach.

"Philon, I know what I saw. Haresh has Miss Foxworthy somewhere in these woods, and I have reason to believe that her life is in danger. I will not let an innocent girl die at the hands of a ruthless centaur." Philon blinks, but otherwise ignores my slight. "If you do not help me to find her, then I will search for her on my own."

Philon stares long and hard at me. I meet his gaze defiantly, refusing to be the first to look away and ignoring the frantic fear pulsing through me. Finally, Philon nods.

"I will support your hunt, Priestess." Philon says. I blink is surprise. The corners of Philon's mouth curl upwards slightly. "Haresh is not the honorable creature he pretends to be. This much I know."

I bow. "Thank you."

Philon returns my bow before calling for one of the forest creatures. He comes, and they converse briefly in their strange native language. After a minute, the creature runs swiftly back to the clearing.

"Come," Philon turns to follow the messenger at a slower pace.

I sidle up to Philon's side. "Has Haresh presented much trouble since receiving the magic?"

"No, Priestess." Philon answers without so much as glancing at me. "Once he w as banned from the human world, he retreated into his own mind. He does not speak to the other creatures, and goes off on his own, often not coming back for hours. He neglects his duties to the other centaurs. It is not like him." Philon rests his unsettling gaze on me. "That is what has me so suspicious of his actions."

"No one knows where he goes, what he does?" I ask incredulously.

"Many have asked. Few get answers." Philon's gaze wanders away from mine again. "Only Neela seems to get a response, but she will not tell anyone." Philon quickens his pace, making it clear that our conversation is over.

I look to Kartik, who hadn't left my side once through the whole conversation. "What do you make of it?" I ask him, linking our arms together.

"I don't think Haresh is our only problem." Kartik answers in an undertone. "It seems--"

"Philon! Priestess!" the messenger creature interrupts, a look of shock on his dirt-smudged face as he sprints towards us.

"What is it?" Philon barks, attracting the attention of the beings around us. I feel Ann practically quaking with anxiety behind me.

The messenger halts and gazes up at us with wide eyes. "Haresh--he's gone!"

**Finally! After a very long wait (which I really am sorry for!). What do you think? The next chapter was a blast to write. I hope you enjoy the action. (HINT HINT)**

**Anyway, I've been massively upset for the past two days. Washburn, my band director (and pretty much second father) isn't going to be coming back to my school next year. He's going to another school as the assistant principal. If your in band, you probably understand how much of an emotional blow this was. He told us on Monday, and we all had to stay in the band room for almost all of fourth block because we were crying. So, please, please, please review and make me feel better.**

**Oh, and by the way, I've decided to do the wedding, then the epilogue. Your welcome, and thanks for your input! It really helped me decide. Please keep the reviews coming, especially you broke 20 reviews for chapter 13. Thanks!!**

**Can't wait to go to Washington DC with the band in sixteen days (!!),**

**'Image**


	16. Chapter 15: Swish Again

**Hmm not so many reviews last time. But I understand why. There wasn't much to review, was there? Hopefully this makes up for it (and I think it does). Here's chapter 15!**

**Disclaimer: Not Libba. So, I don't own this. Got it? Good. :)**

"Gone?" I ask, my mind going numb as this horrifying realization washes over me. Felicity and Ann gasp in the background. Kartik's grip on my arm becomes suddenly vice like.

The messenger nods. "The last anyone saw of him, he was walking into the trees over there."

Philon's eyes follow mine as I glance at the vast woods around us.

"Find Neela. Maybe _she _can tell us where he is," Philon spits angrily. The messenger shuffles his feet uncomfortably. Philon's already outraged eyes flash, and my heart sinks.

"She's gone as well, Philon," the creature answers hesitantly. "You went to speak with the Priestess, and she disappeared."

"How _dare _she!" Philon roars irately. "After I forgave her--"

"Now is not the time!" I cut Philon off. "We must find them, and quickly. There's no telling what they will do to Jacqueline now."

"Very well," Philon responds tersely. "What will you have us do, Priestess?"

"Go into the forest," I say tensely. "Find Haresh. Do whatever you desire with him."

"And when we're through with him?" Philon inquires in a deadly voice. "What will we do with the girl?"

"Bring her here," I answer. "I'll be back sooner or later. We can decide what to do from there."

"As you wish, Priestess," Philon says, and turns to face the rest of the creatures, speaking to them in that bizarre foreign language of theirs. The creatures all nod somberly and scatter into the surrounding trees. Once the last shape-shifter is out of sight, Philon turns to face me.

"I must join them," Philon tells me. "You may roam the woods. We will leave you the girl."

"Thank you," I reply, and Philon marches into the forest. I look at my friends and sigh. "We should go, too. Fee, you go with Ann. Kartik can come with me."

"B-but," Ann stutters, "how can _we _d-deal with Haresh?"

"You don't have to," I reassure her, reaching for her quivering hands. "Just use the magic. You can access it now. Trick Haresh into coming back here, with Neela and Jacqueline. You can do it. And besides," I throw Fee a small smile, "you've got the best archer I know at your side."

"Exactly," Fee strides forward and throws her arm around Ann's shoulders. "You've got nothing to worry about, Ann. Just think: warrior maidens." She smirks. "How theatric." Ann gives a small, halfhearted laugh.

"That's the spirit," I declare weakly, stepping back to Katik's side. "Now go."

Fee grasps Ann's hand and tows her away, nodding to me as they pass. I watch mutely as my friends disappear into the shadows. Kartik takes my hand and kisses me softly.

"Are you ready?" he asks quietly.

"Yes." Even I can hear the wavering uncertainty in my voice.

We wade through the underbrush, pushing aside branches and listening for any sign of approaching hooves. All is silent around us, and my anxiety only grows. How much farther could Haresh have gone? Is it too late to save Jacqueline? Has someone else already found them? Thousands of questions bombard my mind as we trudge through the forest, doing our best not to make a sound. Kartik moves forward with hardly a rustle, while I shuffle into branches, step on twigs, and catch my skirt on protruding trees. My mood darkens with each noisy step, and my attention on the ground in front of me reduces.

Suddenly, my foot catches on a root, and I fall straight forward onto the hard ground. For a moment, Kartik stands over me, looking unsure whether to laugh or to help me to my feet. I scowl at him from the ground and he settles for bending to grasp my hand, a smirk on his face.

"Thank you," I snap, snatching my hand away irritably the moment I am sturdy. Kartik merely smiles back and stretches his hand towards me again.

Before he can touch me, however, his hand freezes. His eyes scan our surroundings carefully. I feel nervous goosebumps rising on my arms.

"Kartik?" I ask quietly, but he holds up a hand to silence me. My gaze follows his, though I am not sure what I am searching for. "What's wrong?" I try again after a few minutes of fruitless listening.

"I thought I heard something," he whispers back, stepping closer to me. "Over--there, did you hear me?" I shake my head. "It was like a twig snapping...there it is again. Someone's coming."

I stare into the trees again, listening hard. And then I hear it: a short, sharp _crack!_

"Don't move," Kartik whispers into my ear, squeezing my hand and stepping in the direction of the noise. I look after him worriedly, feeling very much alone in this dark, silent forest.

Out of nowhere, a stifled scuffle erupts from the trees, sounding very close by. Fear rises in my throat like a poisonous bile at the thought of Kartik battling shape-shifting Neela and muscular Haresh alone. I take a hesitant step towards the invisible fight. Before I can do anything else, however, all noise stops.

I feel my limbs start trembling. Is Kartik hurt? Has he found Jacqueline? I take a deep breath and summon the courage to step forward again. But another rustle stops me in mid-step. I stare anxiously into the shadows, looking for the source.

Without warning, a dark figure breaks through the trees and reaches for my arm. I open my mouth to scream, but the figure cuts me off.

"Hurry, Gemma!" Kartik urges, pulling me after him deeper into the forest. "They're running away, and they have the girl."

"They--what?" I pant, shoving branches aside as we fly between the trees.

"Haresh and Neela," Kartik explains at a run. "They attacked me, and ran away with the girls before I could do anything."

I push through the trees with renewed vigor. I let Kartik lead, as he seems to know where we are going. He sprints just in front of me, his carefully measured breathing adding to the thumps of our heavy footfalls and the cracks of branches snapping. Neither of us are concerned with silence anymore.

Finally, Kartik comes to a sudden stop, gazing intently ahead. I clutch at a stitch in my side and try my hardest to see in the very weak sunlight creeping through the thick trees.

"What are we doing?" I hiss quietly at the motionless Kartik.

"Waiting," he answers, not even glancing at me.

"For what?"

Finally, he turns to look at me, annoyed. "Haresh."

I gaze up at Kartik in confusion. There is something wrong, but I don't know what. I slip my ands into his. The usually calming gesture sends a shiver down my spine. His hold on my hand is icy and unfamiliar, as if my hand doesn't belong there. I shiver again.

"Is something wrong?" Kartik asks, a peculiar, artificial concern in his voice.

"I could ask you the same," I retort, taking an involuntary step back. Kartik's hand tightens around mine.

"Where are you going?" he demands, jerking me closer again.

"Nowhere," I try to shake off his hold, but he refuses to release me. "Kartik, let _go!_" I struggle, but he only smirks and crushes my fingers with his. "What on earth is wrong with you?" I cry, still struggling. "Have you gone mad?"

"That is quite enough," a chillingly familiar voice, the voice from my nightmares, rings out from the trees behind Kartik. I feel my eyes grow wide as Haresh steps into view, a cruel grin twisting his features. In his hand is a rope, tied to the pale and scarred wrists of Jacqueline Foxworthy.

Haresh laughs at the shock on my face. "Hello, Priestess," he says, approaching me and yanking Jacqueline behind him, "nice of you to join us."

"I came as quickly as I could," Kartik tells him, dropping my hand like a hot coal and walking to Haresh's side. "She's not one for speed, are you, Priestess?"

I blink at Kartik in wounded bewilderment, feeling as though I've been dropped straight into one of my horrific nightmares. "What--"

"--am I doing?" Kartik finishes, smiling coldly. "Exactly what I've been doing this whole time."

I stare in disbelief at Kartik. But he is not Kartik anymore. As I watch, the figure I know so well changes and shrinks. I blink, and before me stands Neela, her hateful mouth bent in a mocking smile, all traces of her earlier nervousness gone, replaced by arrogant victory.

"Surprise, Priestess," she says nastily, placing her hand on Haresh's shoulder.

"Where is Kartik?" I ask heatedly, still in shock. "What have you done with him?"

"He will come around in a few hours," Haresh answers lazily. "Stupid human, thought he could take me on and win." He grins at me. "But I was merciful to him. You, Priestess, will not be so lucky."

I take an automatic step back. The magic swarms within me, begging to be let loose, but I hold it in for the time being, for fear of hitting Jacqueline. Haresh mimics my step forward, but Jacqueline, caught unawares by the sudden movement, falls to her knees. The centaur looks down at her.

"Get up, you worthless human!" he snarls, wrenching her roughly to her feet.

"Leave her alone," I growl, suppressing my fear and advancing on Haresh.

Neela laughs. "Or what, Priestess? You'll use the magic on us?"

"Hold her," Haresh commands, handing Neela Jacqueline's rope. I see the girl peek at me from beneath her tangled mass of hair, voicelessly screaming a plea for help. Neela tugs her away from Haresh, who turns to me. "Now then, Priestess," he chuckles, "to business."

Haresh grins viciously at me. I see the plea in Jacqueline's eyes change briefly to pity, and then I am on the ground writhing in pain and clutching my stomach. My brain screams at me that the pain is only an illusion from the magic, but it feels all too real. I feel as though a hot knife is lodged inside me, burning and tearing painfully. I open my mouth, but I do not know if the screams I hear are real or in my head. In front of me, Haresh and Neela laugh down at my pitiful form, and Jacqueline watches in horror.

After what seems like hours of relentless pain, the aching lessens, and I stand on quaking legs. The magic is within reach, but as I try to call on it, the pain worsens and I double up again. Haresh laughs loudly.

"The great High Priestess can't even fend off an illusion?" he asks victoriously. "You will be easier to break than I thought."

I lie panting on the ground. Pins seem to be pricking me everywhere, drawing gasps of pain from my lips. Still, the magic burns away inside me, and I strive to reach it.

"Come on now, Priestess," Haresh goads, "make it fun for me. Struggle."

The pain returns, but I ignore it. I stand before Haresh and channel all my energy into summoning the magic. A shadow passes over Haresh's face. I feel the pain double, but I refuse to succumb to it. The magic tingles at my fingertips. I focus on sending it towards the centaur.

Haresh's legs buckle and he drops to the ground, grunting in pain. Neela lets go of Jacqueline's rope and runs to his side. Haresh tries to stand, but falls again with another groan, the joint aboce one of his rear hooves swollen. But before I can celebrate my small victory, the swelling goes down, and Haresh stands again, glaring angrily at me.

"Is that all you can do, Priestess?" he snarls. He flicks his tail in aggravation.

_Swish..._

My mind flashes back to my bedroom many nights ago, when I had been frightened by a noise, a noise that had seemed so out of place...

"It was _you_in Spence that night," I say, staring accusingly at Haresh. "_You_ were creeping about my door."

"About time you caught on, pet," Haresh mocks, swishing his tail again. "You don't know how many times I've been breathing down your neck, about to take you away." He pauses, and I feel a breeze against my neck, sending shivers down my spine. "How luck has spared you a fate worse than you can imagine."

My eyes fly to Jacqueline, who now stands on her own, bruised, bloodied, and unable to run away.

"But you're here now," Haresh continues, glaring at me with loathing. "I can finish this."

Before I know what's happening, Haresh is racing towards me, fury in his heartless eyes. Neela cheers him on with a wild battle cry, brandishing the rope like a sword. Jacqueline stands to the side, the picture of wide-eyed terror. And then Haresh is rearing in front of me, hooves just inches from my face. I duck and lose my balance, falling flat on my back.

Haresh looms over me like a great black statue, pawing the ground. I scramble to call up the magic, but I am not fast enough. I see the muscles in his shoulder tense, and then feel the pain as his rigid hoof meets my side. I cry out in agony, pressing a hand to my ribs. Distantly, the sound of malicious laughter reaches my ears, and I turn my head to see Haresh rearing high above me.

My vision grows blurry, and soon I can see nothing.

After what seems like hours, I open my eyes. Everything around me is dark, but even through the shadows I can make out the faint outline of trees. I'm still in the forest. A sharp throbbing sensation in my side reminds me of my injury, and I turn my attention to it. My ribs feel as though they are on fire. Eyes watering, I call forth the magic to heal myself.

Just as I am about to use it, though, a panicky thought enters my mind. What if I've broken something, and the magic makes it heal wrong? What will I do then? That is certainly not something I want to do, but I cannot function with the pain, and I can't fight Haresh with it. Another excruciating throb assaults my body. Gritting my teeth, I let the magic flow into my wound so that I can no longer feel it. The throbbing diminishes.

I stand gingerly and peer through the gloom at my surroundings.

No one is around me, and all traces of Haresh, Neela, and Jacqueline are gone, as if they were never there. I set off into the trees, trying to find a path to get back to the clearing, and to find Kartik. Silence envelops me, making my footsteps seem louder than they really are. An odd shiver creeps over me, as if I'm being watched.

Feeling highly uneasy, I start running, neither knowing nor caring where I'm headed. Sticks and brushes scratch at me, ripping my dress and tearing at my hair. A branch grazes my arm, and blood trickles slowly through my sleeve. But I stumble on through the unfamiliar land, ignoring the spasms of pain that shoot from my ribs, and the sharp sting of a stick scraping my skin.

A sudden drop in the trail I've been following catches me off guard, and I fall, hard. I gasp in pain as the jolt of my fall jars my injured ribs, and gasp again at a dull throb from my ankle. My hands have new cuts on them, leaving the faint imprint of blood on my skirt as I disentangle my injured ankle from the ripped fabric. I quickly brush away tears, leaving a smudge of dirt and blood on my cheeks, ans stand shakily, favoring my twisted ankle. Clutching a tree for support, I look up at my surroundings through stray locks of hair.

The river glitters in the faint light before me. My heart leaps at the familiar water, and I hobble over to it, desperate to find my way back to the clearing.

"Gemma," a memorable voice calls softly, and I stumble to a halt at the river's edge. "Gemma, don't run. Come here."

I look over my shoulder to see my mother advancing through the trees, arms spread wide. Behind her strides Amar, his eyes the chilling blue-white of our last encounter.

"Mother?" I breathe, confused.

"Gemma, darling," Mother coos, beckoning to me, "I've missed you."

"No," I shake my head to clear it, "you're dead. You're not real."

"Of course I am." Mother comes closer, Amar staying just behind her. "Why don't you come over here to me? Come, Gemma." I step back firmly, forgetting about my ankle. I gasp, and Mother grins. "Injured, pet? Here, I can help you."

"No!" I shout, turning to jump into the river, but strong arm catches me around the waist and pulls me away from the water. "Let go of me!"

"I don't think so, Priestess," Amar laughs, dragging me towards the image of my mother. "We have unfinished business to attend to." He smiles wickedly. "You see, we never thanked you properly for killing us."

"I didn't kill you!" I thrash madly about in Amar's hold, trying to free myself. Mother laughs.

"Of course you did, darling," she says, stroking my cheek with icy fingers.

More tears stream down my face. I kick Amar with all of my might in his most tender area. He drops me with a grunt, and I hit the ground again. My damaged ankle screams in protest, but I overlook the pain. I throw myself against my mother, knocking her out of the way, and hurtle along the side of the river in what I pray is the direction of the clearing.

"Come to me, darling," my mother's voice echoes in my ear.

"She's dead, Gemma, she's dead, she's dead..." I say over and over as I sprint away.

More voices come from the shadows, each one with the same malicious undertone.

"Gemma, come out to play!" Pippa sings to me, waving from the trees. "We'll throw a ball, just like old times!"

Mrs. Spence follows Pippa. "About time you've come again, Priestess," she says. "My wraiths need a toy to play with." I keep running, willing my smarting ankle to carry me as far away as possible.

"Lady Hope, the voices come," Nella Hawkins emerges before my eyes, wringing her hands and peering nervously about her. "They come, they come, they come for _you, _Lady Hope." Nell moans wretchedly. "Oh no, Lady Hope, oh _no_."

"Come now, Miss Doyle," Miss Moore appears at Nell's side. "Stop avoiding us. You can't run forever."

"No!" I scream, holding onto a tree to keep from falling. "Leave me be! You're dead, all dead!" Tears start to break free, streaming from my eyes. "Go away!"

"Hush, love," Mother purrs, "we'll disappear in time, when you've joined us."

Mustering all of my dwindling strength, I push off of the tree and limp as fast as I can away from the eerie figures of the dead. They continue to call after me, their voices growing angrier and louder.

"It's all your fault, Gemma!" Pippa screams tearfully. "I wouldn't be her if it weren't for you! You didn't want me to be with Fee! You didn't want us to be happy!"

"How can I call a child like you my daughter?" Mother whimpers, pointing accusingly at me. "I would be alive if you hadn't run away! Why did you run away, Gemma?"

I can't take it anymore. With a final cry, I collapse, tears rolling down my dirty cheeks and soaking into the soil beneath me. I lie face first on the ground, screaming and crying and trying to block out the screeching accusations of those whose blood is on my hands.

Haresh's face swims to the front of my mind. A hot, blazing anger pierces through me.

"Haresh!" I sob into my bleeding hands. "You coward! Come and fight me, if you have the nerve!"

The shrieking stops. I lift my head to find the ghostly images gone, replaced by empty air. I'm back in the clearing. My nervous breathing seems to echo through the trees.

"I am not a coward, Priestess," Haresh's voice says as the centaur appears in front of me. He sneers nastily. "And now, the real fun begins."

**Dun, dun, DUNNN!! Oh, I love cliff hangers. They make you anxious, and me laugh. Evily. MUAHAHA!**

**So, yet another penname change. This one has a story. My eyes change color (dark blue, light blue, gray, green, hazel, etc.), and we don't know why, but they do. My friend (what a smart girl) says that no matter what color my eyes are, they always get really bright when I'm excited, so she called me "Brighteyes". I get excited when I'm reading/writing, so I thought it fit. And "Bevin" is my name. So...yupp.**

**Reviews, please. Or you won't get the rest of this fight, OR the wedding, OR an epilogue. I'll just leave it at this. Be afraid. Be very afraid.**

**Is going to DC to play in front of the Navy Memorial in 10 DAYS!!,**

**Brighteyes**


	17. Chapter 16: Enough

**Alright, I'm not going to say much, because I'm trying to get ready for my Washington trip as well as post this...so a quick thank you for the reviews, and here's chapter 16!**

**Disclaimer: Not Libba. She's too cool for me. Oh, and she also happens to own these characters.**

They say that just before you die, your life flashes before your eyes.

But for me, all I saw was Haresh careening towards me, his eyes fixed on my frozen form. Then his immense hooves rise above me, and the next thing I feel is a great pain in my ankle before I scream in distress.

"Such a weak priestess," Haresh tuts over my anguished cries. "Can't even struggle. Fight, Priestess!" He aims a kick at my already bruised ribs, and I double up in agony.

I heartily wish that I _could_ fight, that I could return this pain. But I can't. The magic is now nothing but a small flicker buried deep within me. I gaze powerlessly up at Haresh and Neela from my position on the ground. Jacqueline hovers in the background, trembling from head to foot.

"Weak," Haresh spits, pacing around me. "You're unfit to be the High Priestess. I'd be doing the realms a favor by killing you."

"Then do it," I bark, gritting my teeth at the throbbing from my twice injured ankle.

"Not yet," he smiles viciously. "I mean to enjoy this, Priestess. Besides," his smile grows wider, "how could you leave your family like that?" I flinch, and he laughs. "Of course, death might be the less painful route, wouldn't it, Priestess? Can't seem to do anything right, can you? Always a disappointment."

"Stop it!" My voice trembles with shame. Though it is only talk, a ring of truth still surrounds Haresh's words. "That is enough!"

"It will never be enough, Priestess," Haresh says icily. "Your kind have committed too many wrongs against us creatures. You are but the beginning of our payback. In fact, your little Rakshana friend would—"

"Stay away from Kartik!" I shout angrily, leaping precariously to my feet. The magic suddenly flares within me. Without another thought, I send it flying towards Haresh, nothing but revenge on my mind.

The smug smile on Haresh's face is wiped clean off as he falls, his entire body convulsing in pain, bruises blooming all over his skin. Blood drips from a long gash on his arm. Neela screams and drops to her knees beside him. Jacqueline simply stares in shock.

I gaze down at Haresh. He looks back at me, his usually ruthless eyes begging for me to let him live. My heart twinges guiltily. I don't need another death hanging over my head. With great effort, I reign in the magic. Haresh lies very still, and I listen to his ragged breathing.

"Haresh?" Neela's alarmed voice attracts my attention. "What did she do? _Haresh?_"

With Neela's help, the centaur heaves himself to his feet unsteadily. Their murderous eyes glare at me.

"You can't rid yourself of me that easily, Priestess," Haresh spits. I don't answer.

Haresh leers evilly. I take a step back, but it is too late. The magic hits me hard like a powerful gust of wind, knocking the breath out of my lungs. My head spins sickeningly, making me sway on the spot. I crumple to the ground and lie there, gasping for air. Haresh and Neela laugh nastily, but I can hardly hear then over the ringing in my ears. After a moment of desperate breathing and stabbing pain, I stagger to my feet, still panting.

"Haven't had enough yet, Priestess?" Haresh taunts, crossing his arms.

"It will never be enough," I mimic weakly. He scowls.

"We'll see about that." Haresh closes his eyes. Immediately, my leg muscles seize up, and I'm frozen in place. The centaur strides towards me and bends so that our faces are level. "Try to stop me now."

He brings his hard fist across my face, bruising my jaw. I cry out, but he doesn't seem to hear. Again and again, his hand connects with my flesh, leaving painful marks on my skin. Frozen as I am, I cannot fight back, though tears clear tracks through the blood and grime on my cheeks and my breathing goes ragged with wounded sobs.

Finally, the punches stop, and Haresh stares at me, panting slightly.

"You make this too easy, Priestess," he murmurs, bringing his smirking face to mine. "Even _she_ put up more of a fight than you."

My eyes flick over to Jacqueline. She cowers beside Neela, staring at me and Haresh in horror. I look at her bruises, now knowing the pain she went through to get them. An intense hatred for Haresh burns in my veins. I close my eyes.

"What are you—?"

Haresh's suspicious voice is cut off as he stumbles backward. Angry blisters appear on his arms and chest. I watch in grim triumph as he uses the magic to reduce the pain.

But my small victory doesn't last long. My injured limbs scream in distress as Haresh returns my attack with one of his own. I'm sent careening through the air, slamming painfully head-first into a tree. My ribs give another painful twinge as my knees buckle. But Haresh isn't finished yet. With a vicious laugh, his hooves smash into me, catching onto my skirt and pinning me to the ground. I struggle to breathe through the piercing sting in my lungs. Everything starts to go black, my limbs feeling strangely weightless.

"No! Gemma!" I shut my eyes against the voices, willing them to let me die in peace. "No, no, _no_! Gemma!"

Too late. The voices can't touch me now. I'm dying, and Haresh's illusions can't follow me to the afterlife. I smile blissfully. Soon, I'll be free of expectations, free of all obligations to the realms. Finally, I will have peace and quiet.

A loud commotion interrupts my thoughts. I frown. So much for quiet. The noise comes again, louder this time. I squirm uncomfortably, feeling a strange ache all over my body. Is death supposed to be so unpleasant?

"Gemma, come on!" a voice, a heart-achingly beautiful voice, calls, sounding desperate. Kartik.

"Gemma, wake up!" Another, higher voice joins Kartik's, and I vaguely recognize it as Ann's.

I feel something on my hand, but I can't see a thing. Everything is still black. In the distance, I hear a gruff grunt, followed by a thud. A third voice rings out from the haze.

"You leave her alone!" Felicity's determined voice demands. "Ann, wake her up!"

Urgent hands grasp my shoulders and shake me lightly. "Come on, Gemma, please!"

I try my hardest to come back around, but nothing changes. I feel myself sinking deeper into oblivion. It would be so nice to not feel this pain any longer, and so easy to just give up. What am I fighting for? The dark is so warm on my skin, so wonderfully enticing, I don't wish to ever leave it. I let myself fall back into it, deeper and deeper.

"Open your eyes, Gem," Kartik's pleading voice whispers. "Please. For me."

How can I leave Kartik? How can I willingly take myself from him? I take a deep breath, willing myself to make one final effort, Kartik's sweet voice urging me on all the while.

My tired mind gives one last try, and I force my eyes open. Two blurred forms hover close to my head. One of them grips my hand, the other, my shoulder.

"Gemma?" Kartik calls, and the hold on my hand tightens. "Can you hear me?"

"Y-yes," I cough, trying to catch my breath. Ann and Kartik both gasp and lean closer to me. Kartik presses his lips to mine.

"Are you alright?" Ann asks timidly. "Can you stand?"

"I-I don't know," I answer softly, trying to gather my energy again. Piece by piece, my surroundings fall into place in my foggy mind. "What's going on? Where's Fee? What happened to Haresh?"

"Miss Worthington is taking care of him," Kartik replies grimly. He helps me to sit up. "And she's doing rather well."

I stare at my friend in complete shock. Felicity has transformed herself into some kind of lady knight, complete with a bow and arrow. The overall effect is quite intimidating. Her gray eyes pay attention only to Haresh, who is nursing a bleeding wound in his shoulder. Nearby, Neela crouches behind a tree, her face plainly displaying her fear of my friend and her arrows.

"She went straight to him when we found you," Ann explains, watching my awed face carefully. "She's been distracting him since."

I make to stand, and Kartik and Ann grasp my arms, pulling me to my feet. Haresh glances in my direction, but returns his focus to Fee with a roar of pain as a second arrow pierces his skin.

"Enough!" he shouts, throwing the bloody arrow to the ground. "I fight the priestess first." He glares at Fee. "_You_ can be second."

"I'm afraid I can't allow that," Kartik says as he steps in front of me, while Felicity restrings her bow. I feel myself shrinking behind Kartik's protective figure.

"Oh, really?" Haresh grins. "And how do—"

Quick as a flash, Kartik sends a shining silver blade towards Haresh, who rears, howling in agony and favoring his right front leg, where a deep gash bleeds profusely. Beside me, Kartik pulls a second blade from his boot. Haresh kicks the first one away with a snarl.

"Kartik, _move!_" I shout, just as a large branch above us snaps. I shove him out of the way, then try to dodge the branch myself. The end of it knocks into my shoulder, drawing a hiss from my mouth as more blood stains my dress. Haresh laughs victoriously. Neela creeps slowly from her hiding spot, revealing Jacqueline, who still trembles, tears flowing smoothly down her cheeks.

"Give it up, Priestess," Haresh says, smirking at me. "Even with your friends, you cannot overpower me."

"Shut it, you," Felicity snarls, pointing her bow at Haresh. "Or we'll see how well you can talk with this down your throat."

Haresh closes his eyes. Fee scowls, releasing her arrow. It sails cleanly through the air, heading straight for the centaur. Neela screams as the point sinks into Haresh's chest. He opens his eyes again with a gasp, hastily removing the sharp weapon. Splatters of crimson drip onto the ground.

Enraged, Haresh spins to face Felicity, who runs to my side, still pointing her freshly strung bow at him. Haresh pays the weapon no mind and closes his eyes once more. I feel a tugging in the air, as if someone is sucking the atmosphere away.

With a jolt, I realize that the source is Haresh. He's taking in more magic.

"No!" I cry, breaking free of Kartik's hold and limping quickly towards the centaur. "Haresh, you can't—"

"Can't what?" Haresh booms, his voice oddly magnified. "Have the magic? Control it? I will do as I please!" He laughs arrogantly. "Your reign has ended, _Priestess_."

Kartik catches up to me as I continue to hobble towards Haresh, not wanting to find out what will happen when he receives more magic than ever before. Neela gazes up at Haresh with adoring eyes, her mouth open slightly. A sick feeling of dread settles in my stomach, and I hobble still faster towards the pair, gritting my teeth against the stinging pain. Haresh's form radiates power, the air around him hums with the magic. I stop several feet before him, afraid to get any closer. Kartik grips my arm, but does not pull me away. I grip his hand tightly.

"Priestess!" Haresh bellows suddenly, opening his eyes again. "It is time to finish this!"

"No!" I shout, trying to inch closer, but Kartik restrains me. "Haresh, stop—"

Haresh cuts me off with a loud laugh. "Don't worry, Priestess. You won't feel a thing once I've finished with you."

I watch in helpless horror as Haresh closes his eyes yet again. A smile lights up his face as the tugging on the air grows more insistent.

Suddenly, a painful shudder rips through Haresh's large body. His smile wilts and his eyes pop open. Beads of sweat appear on his forehead. Concerned, Neela reaches for his arm.

"Haresh?" she murmurs, her hand getting closer and closer to his. I remember what had happened to Fee the last time she had touched me when I harbored so much active magic.

"Neela, _no_!" I cry, but it is too late. Her hand touches his, and the magic forces its way into her. Both Haresh and Neela stare at their hands, surprised into immobility. They begin to tremble, their entire bodies shivering as far too much magic is shoved into them. Neela's eyes roll, and she collapses to the ground.

But Haresh remains standing. He lifts a quivering hand in my direction.

"Revenge," he rasps. For a final time, he closes his eyes. A foreboding sense of horror fills me.

"Duck, Gemma!" Fee shouts, pulling Ann after her as she dashes into a group of trees. Kartik seizes my hand and tugs me after them. Before we are completely sheltered, though, a blinding white light flashes, followed by a deafening boom. I fall to my knees, covering my head with my hands. Kartik wraps me protectively in his arms, shielding me from harm's way.

And then, everything stops. The light disappears, and every sound ceases. I lift my head warily, looking for the results of Haresh's magic. Kartik stands and pulls me up with him, his dark eyes sweeping the trees. I follow his lead, but freeze at the sight in the small clearing.

Haresh lies sprawled across the ground, his eyes open and unseeing. Trickles of blood flow from his wounds to create small scarlet pools on the earth. His lifeless body nearly covers Neela's, who rests beneath him, crushed under his massive weight. Her eyes are closed, as if in sleep. A thin line of blood leaks out from her barely parted lips.

To see them like this is both a relief and a shock, something my exhausted mind is not yet ready for. I turn away from the gory sight, looking my friends over. Kartik sports several rips in his clothes, and a few faint bruises on his forehead and arms, though he appears to have escaped major injuries. Ann seems unharmed, apart from a small cut on her neck, probably from a branch. Fee stands the farthest away, cuts crossing on her arms and neck, her cheek bleeding feebly. A bruise is blooming spectacularly on her collarbone. In her hand, she holds her bow, with the arrows secured to her back.

A soft rustle from the forest distracts me. I jump in surprise, but relax again as Jacqueline emerges, carefully avoiding the bodies of her former tormenters. She has stopped trembling, and seems much more relaxed than I've ever seen her. But still, there is something wrong about her. I take a closer look.

Her skin, already pale, is almost transparent beneath the grime and wounds. Her once-beautiful eyes are haunted by terror and glassy with shock. Her tattered dress hangs loosely on her too-thin body. I see before me not a woman of London, but a lost spirit, trying to find her way to rest. She is no longer the living Jacqueline Foxworthy, and to return her to her family would be like replacing that girl all together.

With a jolt, I realize that it is time for Jacqueline to move on.

"Excuse me," she says, approaching me shyly, "but can you help me?"

"I think so," I answer, smiling shakily at her. "Here, let me take those off." I untie her ropes quickly, letting them fall to the ground.

"Thank you," she smiles, rubbing her wrists tenderly. She looks around her before looking to me again, almost nervously. "Can I…is it…my time?"

"It is," Fee nods. "You cross over the river, and then…well, we don't know for sure, but you don't stick around here."

Jacqueline smiles, a nice, charming smile that undoubtedly captured the attention of many men while she was alive. "Thank you. It will be nice, I think, to be free of this place. I only wish…" Her voice trails off sadly. After a moment of silence, she sighs in a resigned sort of way and reaches my hand. "If I cannot go back to them, can you please let my family know that I am at peace?"

I nod. "I will."

Jacqueline positively beams. "Thank you, Priestess. For everything."

With a final wave, she disappears into the trees, on her way to finally coming to rest. I watch her go, feeling vaguely disappointed that I couldn't return her to her family. But maybe it is for the best. The many cuts and bruises that cover her pale skin seem to disappear as she walks, and I see the happy young woman, full of life and laughter. She vanishes into the shadows, the last strand of her tattered dress whipping out of sight.

Kartik wraps his arms around my waist, accidentally brushing against my injured ribs. I gasp, and everyone's eyes fly to me.

"What is it?" Ann asks, coming closer anxiously.

"Haresh hit me. I think he broke something," I reply through gritted teeth. Kartik's eyes flash, and I hurriedly add, "Don't worry, I can fix it."

I place my hand over my throbbing side. A sigh of relief escapes me as the soothing magic flows over it, then spreads to my ankle so that I can stand properly again. Finished with that, I look at my friends and their wounds. I brush Fee's bruises with my fingers, watching them shrink before my eyes. Kartik is next; I run my hands over his various injuries, healing them. Ann shakes her head when I move to mend her small cut.

"I'm fine, Gemma," she says. "You keep your strength. You look dead on your feet."

I smile my thanks, and Kartik cautiously slides his arms around me, pressing his lips gently to my forehead.

Fee sighs. "Let's go. Philon will want to know about this," she says, starting back to the clearing. Fee follows, but Kartik holds me back.

"Gemma," he whispers, gazing down at me intently, "are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes," I answer, smiling reassuringly. "What about you?"

"I am fine. Haresh didn't do too much damage to me." He brings his lips to my ears. "You are to stay with Miss Worthington tonight?" I nod. Kartik smiles mischievously. "Would you rather spend the night with me?"

I look up at him suspiciously. "Of course. But how—?"

"Just leave it to me," Kartik says. "I've got a room we can stay in. Small, but functional." His smile spreads. "Well, there's a bed, anyway."

**Hehe dirty Kartik. I hope you liked this, and if you didn't, then my true excuse is that I suck at confrontations. Love it? Hate it? Tell me in a review!!**

**Soo Washington. I've got a solo in one of our songs, and I'm pretty excited. Woot!! We're leaving at midnight tonight, and not coming back until 6 a.m. on Monday, so please review to make me even happier!**

**Excited out of her mind,**

**Brighteyes**


	18. Chapter 17: Magnets

**Phew, I finally got to updating! I'm sorry it took so long, but I was first recovering from Washington, then getting ready for finals, then saying goodbye to Washburn. So, here's chapter 17, and I thank you for your patience and reviews!!**

**Disclaimer: I'm (sadly) not Libba Bray, so I don't own these characters. I just like to take them for a walk now and again. :)**

Hours later, Kartik and I wade through the nighttime London crowd to his apartment, looking like beggars in our torn and soiled clothes. My head spins from the events of my night since we first left Haresh and Neela.

Philon, upon seeing the lifeless figures of the mutinous centaur and renegade servant, immediately took action. The bodies had been burned, along with all of their possessions, much like a gypsy would be. I hadn't been able to watch; instead, Kartik and I had slipped away to the river, where I washed my skin free of blood while he stood guard. The bruises and scratches from my fight with Haresh protested fiercely when I moved, so I quieted them with magic, clearing my skin of my smaller wounds.

Once back in our world, Fee, Ann, and I had all parted with promises of meeting again soon. Ann had seen us to the door, waving until we were washed away with the rest of the crowd. Fee had led Kartik and me to her house, where I stopped to collect my clothes from my friend's bedroom before walking back into the streets, on our way to Kartik's flat.

Kartik stops in front of a well-hidden door. I look around at the dark street. It is dingy and deserted, save for a stray cat and a quartet of drunken men singing a rather revolting song. I turn to Kartik, eyebrow raised.

He shrugs. "It does the job. No one comes to call." Turning to the door, he quickly unlocks it. It swings open on silent hinges to reveal more darkness.

I sigh and follow him into the dim one-roomed apartment, decorated only by a bed and a dresser. A small light flickers into life, throwing my shadow high against the plain white walls. Kartik comes up behind me, snaking his arms around my waist.

"You were wonderful today," he whispers, kissing my neck.

I blush. "Fee was braver than I was. Haresh was about to finish me off before she came."

Kartik turns me around to face him. He presses his lips against my eyelids.

"Let's not think about that." he says, moving his lips to my neck. "Haresh is gone. You are free of the realms." He nips my skin teasingly. "We are alone."

"Mmm…alone," I mumble, turning my head to the side so Kartik can reach my neck with more ease. "And what, pray tell, did you have in mind for tonight?"

Kartik chuckles into my neck, whispering, "I think we can find something to do."

I wrap my arms around Kartik's shoulders and pull him to the bed. We fall back, and Kartik lands gently on top of me, balancing his weight on his knees. I trail my lips over his neck while my hands trace his well-muscled arms. Kartik quickly unties my dress, his hands lingering at my back.

"Gem," he murmurs into my hair, moving to unlace my corset. I respond by unbuttoning his shirt, feeling his warm skin as the fabric falls away. My corset loosens and falls, and then I feel my chemise being pulled, just as I succeed in unfastening Kartik's trousers. My hands travel the length of his bare legs, his skin as smooth as a fine silk under my eager fingers.

Kartik's hands rest on my exposed breasts, his lips outlining my feminine form. He looks up at me, a seductive smile on his face. I can't resist him. Like magnets, our lips meet in a feverish flurry of kisses, each one mounting in passion. Strokes and caresses, sighs and murmurs, making love with Kartik is pure heaven. In the few moments where his skin leaves mine, the small space between our bodies seems as large as an ocean, and I hurry to close it so that I can feel his touch.

Kartik presses against me, our bodies moving as one and drawing gasps of delight from my lips. He kisses my stomach gently, eyes flicking up to my face. He's wearing that grin again, as if he knows what it does to me. I push myself on top of Kartik, and he lies beneath me on the bed, hands grasping my sides. As I lean over him, my hair trails over his dark skin like liquid fire.

"How do you _do_ that?" I demand, gazing down at his still-seductive smile and stroking his arm.

"Do what?" he asks, pulling me slightly closer.

"Make me want you." I whisper without thinking, kissing his chest lightly.

Kartik looks slightly surprised, but quickly recovers to laugh lightly. "Gemma, if only you knew how much _I_ want _you_."

I lean towards him, bringing my lips directly to his ear. "I'm yours."

With a stifled moan, Kartik's perfect mouth claims mine again urgently, his tongue gently trailing over my lips. I open my mouth, tasting his ragged breathing. I trace Kartik's lower stomach and the line of hair there. He groans again and lets go of my lips. His arms wrap around me, bringing me eye-level with him. My lips find his in the dark, and I kiss him firmly.

Kartik murmurs my name through my lips, clutching me to him. My legs wrap around his waist, my arms around his shoulders. He calls my name again, kissing my neck. His mouth opens and he nips my skin as I tangle my fingers in his hair.

He moves so that he now towers over me, staring down at my bare body with unmistakable lust. My hands drift to finger his spine.

"Gemma," he gasps, closing his eyes briefly. I shift my weight slightly, and Kartik groans. His hands grip my body gently, yet firmly. His breathing grows harsher as he bends towards me, pressing his lips against my skin, my stomach, my chest. He moans quietly when I shift under him again. I smile, fully enjoying my newfound effect on him.

Seeing my grin, Kartik holds himself just above me so that his skin is but a whisper against mine. Cradling my legs in his, he brings his lips to hover over mine. I feel his breath against my lips and reach for him to bring him closer. Instead, he pulls farther away with a devilish smirk.

I groan longingly. "Kartik," I call, fingering his arm, "come down here."

"Why?" he asks, the grin still firmly in place. "So you can torment me again?" I sigh, shaking my head, and Kartik's smile spreads. "It is my turn to tease, Miss Doyle." He slowly lowers himself back onto the bed, lying next to me and drawing me still closer.

"Hmm…" Kartik hums into my neck, just as he knows I like it. I close my eyes in pure bliss, my fingers massaging his chest. He hums again, purposefully pressing his mouth into my skin. I kiss the top of his head lightly. A trail of warm kisses follows Kartik's lips as he brings them to mine. I press myself against him eagerly, hitching my leg around his hip. Kartik sighs through our kiss.

"You are temptation itself, Miss Doyle," he murmurs, smiling slightly. I stroke his cheek in answer, silently correcting him: _he_ is the real temptation, with his warm brown skin and matching eyes that draw me in, and his muscled body standing as a monument to near-godly perfection.

A sudden burst of desire sends me back into Kartik's loving caress, my lips brushing against everything they can reach. Kartik, only partly surprised at my unexpected enthusiasm, returns the favor, making me groan and shiver in delight.

Minutes blend into hours far quicker than is customary. The sky beyond the slightly grimy window is tinted gray with the first rays of early morning as Kartik and I lie next to each other on the rumpled bedding. My skin tingles pleasantly where he touches it, and a dreamy smile plays at my lips. The silence between us in a comfortable one, filled with our ragged breathing and joined heartbeats.

Kartik sighs lazily. "Gemma," he calls softly, brushing his fingers across my back, "I love you."

I laugh quietly, burying my head in his shoulder. "I know, Kartik."

Kartik shifts slightly, and I know he is staring down at my hidden face. "Do you really?" he asks quietly, so quietly I hardly hear him. I lift my head from his shoulder.

"Of course I do," I tell him, smiling up at his doubt-filled eyes, "you have nothing to prove to me."

"Don't I?" Kartik challenges. I shake my head and entwine my fingers with his. His eyes flick down to our joined hands before returning to my face. I bring our hands to my lips and kiss his fingers softly, gently, not looking away from his eyes.

"I believe you've already proven that you love me, Kartik." I squeeze his hand before letting them fall back to lie on the sheets between us. After a brief moment, the doubt leaves Kartik's eyes and he smiles down at me, kissing me warmly.

Our comfortable silence returns, and I settle back into Kartik's embrace, feeling his muscles as he adjusts his arms around me. A sudden wave of exhaustion washes over me, and a yawn escapes me. Kartik chuckles.

"Sleep, Gem," he purrs into my ear, "it is almost morning."

I shake my head against his chest blearily. "No, I'm f-fine." Another unladylike yawn interrupts me, and Kartik laughs again.

"Good night, Gemma."

"Good night." I let my eyes droop closed, snuggling into Kartik's hold as he traces circles in my skin, allowing the sound of his steady breathing to lull me into a deep, untroubled sleep.

* * *

Hours later, I open my eyes again to see light streaming through the dirt-speckled window at the angle customary for late morning. Light and steady breathing on the back of my neck tells me Kartik is still asleep. I turn over to look at him with a yawn and the rustling of sheets. The quiet noise rouses Kartik, and he opens sleepy eyes. I smile.

"Good morning," I whisper, straining my neck a bit to kiss him. Kartik mumbles a vague response and shifts so that I am held more securely in his arms. He blinks a few times, the drowsy look in his glassy eyes fading slowly. I giggle, and he smiles at me through his tired haze.

"I'm glad I could amuse you," he teases, giving my naked shoulders a gentle squeeze. I beam innocently up at him. Kartik chuckles before glancing out the window. "It's late. Did you have any engagements for the day?"

I shrug, my shoulders jostling his bare chest slightly. "I hadn't made any plans, really. Grandmama will expect me—" I peek out the illuminated window, "—soon. Will you escort me home?"

Kartik looks taken aback. "It would be improper—"

"I've had enough of being proper," I tell him, then smile and kiss him softly. "Get dressed. Grandmama gets finicky when she's kept waiting."

* * *

Just as the sun stretches high above London in its noon position, Kartik and I walk out from his dingy apartment. The quartet from last night have gone, leaving behind a pungent stench of liquor. I wrinkle my nose, but otherwise ignore the smell—and my surroundings—as Kartik steers me out of the shadowed alley.

I link my arm through Kartik's as we wade through the busy crowd. Some turn to gawk at us, the mismatched couple walking down the street as if nothing about us is peculiar. Several people shake their heads at us before turning to gossip to their neighbors. It makes my skin itch to see them react to us this way, but I soldier on, scraping up a smile when Kartik glances down at me. And when he smiles back, I find it much easier to ignore the endless hiss of whispers that follow us like shadows.

It feels odd, to be acting as if last night had never happened. I had been dead, this much I am sure of. And yet, here I stand, living, breathing, arm-in-arm with my fiancé. My stomach gives an involuntary squirm at the thought of how close I had come to never being able to see Kartik again.

At last the crowds thin and the familiar parade of houses that surround my grandmother's own home approach. Kartik and I stroll through the front gate, determinedly casual. I rap the door smartly, ignoring a prickle of unease. After a brief pause, Mrs. Jones pulls open the door to admit us.

"Good morning, miss," the older woman says briskly, no warmth in her flat voice. "Your grandmother is in the parlor. She wishes to speak with you."

"Thank you," I say, pulling Kartik after me as I step through the door. Mrs. Jones eyes him warily as she leads us through the halls to where Grandmama awaits. Taking a steadying breath, I open the door to the parlor and step inside.

Grandmama is sitting in a lone armchair, staring blankly at the painting on the opposite wall. Her eyebrows are drawn together in thought. I swallow. Something is obviously on Grandmama's mind, and that cannot bode well for me, or for Kartik.

"Ah, there you are, Gemma." Grandmama says when she sees me. But then her eyes fall on Kartik, and they turn cold. "Mr. Kartik as well. How…charming." The glint in her eyes is a steely contradiction to her forcibly polite words. "Please, sit."

I tow Kartik over to the nearby pair of armchairs, perching carefully on one while he settles onto the second. Grandmama watches our every movement. No one makes a sound.

"Mr. Kartik and I found each other in the city," I lie, falsely cheerful, to fill the awkward silence. "I decided to walk the remainder of my trip with him while Fee—Miss Worthington visited the shops." I force a smile that Grandmama does not return.

"I see." Grandmama's voice is quiet and painfully courteous. "So you wandered about the city…without a chaperone." I nod sheepishly, wincing slightly at her tone. Kartik can only blink uncomfortably. Grandmama's careful mask breaks, and she looks furious. "Did you even consider what that looks like, going off on your own with some man? No?" She glares at me, then Kartik, before standing. "I have been far too patient with you. You've grown careless, not stopping to think of how every one of your decisions will affect your family. You will not marry Mr. Kartik, and that is _final_."

Unthinkingly, I spring to my feet, fists clenched, glowering at my grandmother. Kartik follows, but his attention is focused on me, making sure I am under control. A flicker of magic stirs deep within me, a temptation I must fight hard to resist. Anger claws at my insides, fighting to escape. Everything my grandmother has said about my engagement, every slight against Kartik, echoes through my mind and fuels my fury. Grandmama looks shocked at my reaction.

A warm brown hand grips my shoulders firmly, and Kartik's face blocks Grandmama from view. His mouth is set in a scolding line, eyes staring down at my livid face.

"Gemma," he says softly, trying to soothe me, "calm down."

"Calm down?" I try to elbow my way past Kartik's restraining arms. "_Calm down?_ No, Kartik. It is far too late for calm."

"Honestly, Gemma," Kartik continues, frowning, "You're frightening your grandmother."

"Good!" I shout, struggling still, snarling furiously at my open-mouthed grandmother. "She has a bloody _reason_ to be frightened!"

"Gemma!" Grandmama gasps, plainly more shocked at my foul language than my threat. "I've _never—_if that is what this engagement has done to you—"

"This engagement hasn't done a bleeding thing to me!" With a last futile shove, I stop struggling and glare over Kartik's shoulder at Grandmama. "It's you that's made me this way!"

"Gemma…" Kartik's voice is a quiet warning as Grandmama gasps, her eyelids fluttering and her hands pressed to her bosom. Beneath the anger, guilt makes its way into my mind. I look at the carpet in shame.

"That is quite enough." Grandmama's voice is filled with hurt anger as she stares stonily at me. "If you won't come to your senses for me, then think of your father, lying in bed, believing you to be his perfect gem. How can you destroy him—?"

"Stop!" All traces of remorse disappear at Grandmama's harsh words. Fury roars in my ears as haunting memories of Haresh's last illusion, the shrieking figures of the dead, float before my eyes, making my stomach roll unpleasantly. The urge to let the magic loose is so strong now, I can feel my defenses weakening. It would be so easy to just let it take her, to let it _hurt_ her…

"No, Gemma," Kartik growls at me. I glance up at him, surprised. "You must control yourself. Come on, now. Breathe." He shakes my shoulder impatiently when I ignore him. "Gemma, _listen to me_. You can't let your anger get the best of you."

He is right. Forcing the magic back down, I take a deep breath, anger still coursing through my veins. Kartik squeezes my shoulders comfortingly, keeping up his murmured "breathe, breathe…" mantra. Grandmama peers in at the two of us curiously, as if waiting to see what will happen now. Enraged thoughts still prowl the corners of my mind, but I order them away, determined to get a grip on my emotions.

When I am sure I am in control, I lift my left hand to Kartik's wrist, gently prying his fingers from my shoulders. After a short hesitation, he releases me, though not before brushing my cheek with his fingertips fleetingly. My hand falls back to my side, and Grandmama's eyes dart towards it, following the glint of light playing across my ring.

"Grandmama, it is high time you accept my decision to marry Kartik." I pause, noting my stiff formality. "A refusal on your part will not end the engagement. Please do not try to stop me anymore. I've grown weary of this game, and I can assure you, you will not win." I falter, seeing shock and hurt on Grandmama's face, though she tries to hide it. Kartik, sensing my distress, moves slightly closer to me. "I don't want this to be a scandal. All I want is to marry Kartik, and then we'll be on our way."

Silence descends upon the room as I finish. Kartik and I watch Grandmama carefully. Her eyes dart from me, to Kartik, to my left ring finger, and back to me again. Minutes pass in this manner before I clear my throat awkwardly.

"I must be going. Kartik and I have…planning to do." I bite my lip, making up our plans on the spot in my eagerness to flee the room. "I will come back when our errands are finished. I'll…I'll have Mrs. Jones bring in some tea for you."

Motioning for Kartik to follow, I turn to leave the room. My hand is on the door handle before a hoarse noise from behind me brings me to a halt.

"Orange blossoms," Grandmama croaks. I look over my shoulder at her.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Orange blossoms," Grandmama repeats, her voice growing stronger. "You'll need flowers, for the wedding. I can get them from the florist. And my gloves." The ghost of a smile lifts the corners of her lips. "You'll need something old. You can wear my best gloves."

Something inside me melts. I beam at my grandmother, gratitude sweeping through me. "Thank you, Grandmama."

She smiles tightly in response, then waves her hands at me in obvious dismissal. I lead Kartik back to the front door, stopping only to send Mrs. Jones for a cup of very strong tea for Grandmama.

Once outside, Kartik and I mutely join hands, staring at each other in wide-eyed astonishment.

"What just happened?" Kartik asks, his eyes not leaving mine.

"I don't know," I shake my head, "but I _think_ we just got her approval."

Kartik beams, pulling me gently to him. He dips his head and kisses me sweetly, wrapping his arms around my waist. I return the kiss, feeling just as giddy and lightheaded as he.

"It's about time she said yes," Kartik says when we pull apart, still grinning. I can't reply. My lips are too busy kissing him to form words.

**Wedding time, lovelies. I hope you enjoyed my pathetic attempt at another confrontation. I didn't want this whole chapter to be sex (by the way, that part of the chapter was written in health, when we were having sex ed. Just a tidbit for you).**

**So, Washington was AMAZING. I had a fabulous time, even if I royaly screwed up my solo. Its beyond words, but if you're my friend on myspace or facebook, the pictures should be going up soon, if you're interested.**

**Today was the last day of school, and thus, the last day with my band director, Washburn. I've cried more over him than any other teacher I've ever had. I'm seriously going to miss him, so please, PLEASE review and help me feel better. I don't want to lose him, but I am, along with all of my senior friends. Reviews are appreciated.**

**Ready to relax, read, and write for the summer,  
Brighteyes**


	19. Chapter 18: Ceremony

**Soo...not too many reviews for the last chapter. I'm wondering why; nothing to review, just didn't feel like it, or really hated it? Oh, well. I have a reason for posting this chapter, so here's chapter 18!**

**But first, this chapter's a belated birthday "gift" for LunaEquus. Happy Birthday, and I'll see you soon!! :)**

**Disclaimer: Libba Bray's the owner, because she's amazing. I took them from her for a bit. Haha**

I stare long and hard at the girl standing before me. There is something familiar about her, yet I'm quite sure I've never seen her before, or that it's been a long time since last we met. She's clad in an elegant white dress that compliments her unusually tall form. Puffed sleeves flare out from slightly masculine shoulders to end in a tapered cuff over trembling, tattooed hands. Copper curls are piled high on top of her head and tucked under a white hat, sweeping sophisticatedly down to brush against pale, freckled cheeks. Her eyes, so green it is almost unsettling, are wide in excitement and terror. I brush a carefully curled strand of hair out of my eyes; the other girl does the same.

"Come on, Gemma," an amused voice calls to me, "your reflection isn't going anywhere." Reflection?

I tear my eyes away from the full-length mirror in front of me to blink at Felicity. Her hands are settled on her hips over a pretty blue dress. Beside her, Ann watches me carefully, wearing a dress exactly like Fee's, though its effect is much more pleasing on the blonde. Everything falls into place in my mind with a jolt.

My hands, already shaking, begin to quake in earnest. I stare down at them and their beautiful henna ink tattoos, painted two days ago for the wedding. I close my eyes. How is it that today is my wedding day? Has time really gone by so quickly? I think back on my last few weeks, what had then felt like an endless parade of planning. I remember getting fitted for my gown, choosing the location, everything. Grandmama's face pops up in my mind's eye as I revisit some of the more memorable moments. She had made herself quite useful in helping with the planning, which had surprised me. The relationship between my grandmother and fiancé remained polite and controlled after my fight with Grandmama, for which I am grateful. It seems as though Grandmama has finally accepted Kartik, even if it is against her will.

"Gemma," Ann's quiet, timid voice interrupts my reverie, "are you ready?"

I open my eyes. "I suppose so," I answer, smiling rather shakily. Ann returns my smile, obviously hoping to reassure me, and comes to stand on my right. Fee follows her, standing on my left. I look at our reflections.

Fee is an absolute vision with her gray eyes twinkling merrily. She had been with me for every step in planning today's events, and is just as excited as me to finally see them in action. The mischievous aura of schoolgirl gaiety and stately dignity of an admiral's daughter still hangs about my friend, creating a sense of familiarity through the newfound grown-up stance Fee has adopted since moving out of her parent's home. Frenzied energy radiates from her smiling figure, strangely filling me with calm.

Ann's company on my other side is not nearly as remarkable as Fee's, although she does look respectably cleaned up. Her smile, though warm, quivers a bit, revealing her well-hidden nerves. And yet, there is something infinitely calm about her, a presence she had so woefully lacked back at Spence. Acting has truly changed my Ann, but only as I had hoped it would. Between her and Fee, I feel as though I've got the best bridal party in all of London, even if I hadn't wanted one in the first place.

Fee drapes her arm around my shoulders. "What a sight we make," she says, beaming at our reflections happily. "Come on. We shouldn't leave Kartik waiting too long."

Taking a deep breath, I nod and follow my friends through the door. Since I had decided to have my ceremony at Spence's chapel, Mrs. Nightwing had lent me my old bedroom in the school to ready myself for the day. The familiar halls of my former school help to calm my nerves as I go through a last-minute checklist to be sure I have everything.

Something old. Grandmama's gloves are clutched tightly in my hands. I slide them on with a barely audible sigh, hiding my henna from view. _Ah, well_, I think to myself,_ Kartik and I know it is there, anyway._

Something new. I slide a hand over my white gown, feeling the smooth fabric shift under my touch. It would be hard to forget _that_ one.

Something borrowed. My mother's favorite broach dangles at my neck. I had been reluctant to wear something of my mother's for today, but Father had insisted, and I had eventually given in. Stroking the delicate jewelry, a sense of my mother surrounds me, and I find I am happy to be wearing it.

Something blue. A handkerchief, stitched with a beautiful and intricate blue pattern by Ann, is tucked safely away in my bodice. A rush of affection for my friend makes my eyes well up, but I blink away the tears before they get a chance to fall.

A lucky sixpence. The coin, given to me by Fee, is wedged inside my shoe. I wiggle my toes, hardly feeling the metal beneath them through the padding of my shoe's soles.

Fee opens the door to the lawn, and Ann leads me out into the light. My heart patters nervously as we approach the church. Is my skirt getting dirty? I wonder. Are my curls behaving? Is a creature from the realms going to swoop in and ruin my wedding day? The calm part of my brain tells me that that is a foolish thought, but the larger, jumpy part forces me to stop dead and look around for any signs of the unnatural. Felicity and Ann look back at me.

"Standing there with your mouth open won't get you to the chapel," Fee remarks wickedly, giving me a not-so-gentle shove forward. "Come on, Kartik will have arrived at the chapel already."

Kartik. His name acts as a stimulant to my paralyzed legs, and I walk forward again. No creature has left the realms since I was last there, I reason with myself. Why would one do so now?

The chapel comes into view just as I manage to calm myself. My heart immediately performs back flips in my throat, making me cough. Two finely dressed people await me at the great wooden doors. As I draw nearer to them, I see it is my father and grandmother. Tom, who had come with them, is presumably inside with Kartik, doing whatever it is that the best man does to prepare the groom.

"Here's the beautiful bride," Father beams, sweeping me into his embrace. I return it, feeling his ribs press against mine. The health of my father had been a concern to me for the past weeks, but Dr. Hamilton had said he was fit enough for the wedding today. Even so, his usually exuberant personality seems a bit wilted.

Quietly, Father whispers in my ear, "You're as pretty as your mother, pet."

"Thank you, Papa," I say, giving him a shaky smile as we pull apart and shoving my pessimistic thoughts away. Today is a day for celebration.

Grandmama stifles a sob by coughing into a very lacy handkerchief. "Well, Gemma, now that you're here, we should get inside. No point in keeping everyone waiting."

I nod curtly, too frightened to speak. Father offers me his arm, and I take it numbly. Ann and Fee smile calmly at me as we walk up to the wooden doors. I blink in stunned surprise as they are pulled open, revealing the halls of the church.

Orange blossoms wrapped in white ribbons adorn every pew. Vases full of the beautiful flowers are placed every few feet along the altar. Still more splashes of white are somehow attached to the wall. On the distant altar, there is an arch of sorts, seemingly made up of leaves and, of course, the vivid orange flowers.

_I'll _kill_ Fee_, I think to myself, glaring at the girl as she glides in front of me, quickly followed by Ann, then Grandmama. A gentle tug on my arm alerts me to the fact that Father has started to follow them, pulling me along with him.

I freeze as every head turns to me.

What am I doing?I ask myself. I'm going to fall in front of all these people! God knows I'm not the most graceful girl. No, I'm not ready for this.

I try to pull away from my father, but my own body won't allow it. My legs have already begun the walk to the altar.

Familiar faces in the crowded pews leap out at me, even through my fright. Family members, distant cousins, aunts, and uncles that I haven't seen since Mother's funeral or longer, are seated throughout the chapel. At the very back, isolated in a corner, sits Fowlson, gaunt eyes fixed straight ahead. A few rows in front of him, Brigid sniffles into her handkerchief as Mrs. Nightwing watches me from beside her, a small, satisfied smile on her face. A little ways away, Mademoiselle LeFarge—now Mrs. Kent—and Inspector Kent perch very close to each other, the newlywed glow still hanging about them as they watch me amble down the aisle.

On my other side, Simon Middleton sits proudly with his new wife. Lucy's belly has a slight swell to it, and her face radiates joy. Just behind the glowing couple, a small group of gypsies watches me with curiosity as I walk slowly past them. One of them, a blonde, blue-eyed girl, glares at me before turning her attention to the altar with a wistful sigh. Charlie Smalls, the composer, sits near them, his politely interested gaze on me, though I see him sneaking glances in Ann's direction. Every face in the pews bears the same curiosity, the same eagerness to see the odd couple that is me and Kartik. Out of the corner of my eye, a light shines steadily through the stained-glass image of the angel with the gorgon's head. For a moment, it seems to come to life, bowing respectively, but then it settles back into its original place. I smile; the creatures of the realms are obviously behind me for this milestone in my, and Kartik's, life.

I turn my head slightly to look forward again. A tall figure, dressed all in black, catches and holds my attention. Kartik's eyes are fixed on me, a mixture of happiness, desire, and fear shining in them. A dot in red turmeric marks his forehead, and a garland is draped about his shoulders. I am reminded forcibly of our dream in the Cave of Sighs, and I feel my lips forming a smile that he readily returns. Everything else melts away, and we are the only two people on earth.

Memories flood through my mind as I make my way gradually to Kartik. This very chapel is where Kartik had first tried to frighten me into ignoring my visions. The difference in our relationship then and now is striking, and a laugh escapes me before I can choke it back. Kartik, undoubtedly remembering the same, laughs quietly along with me. This chapel is where we had first officially met; now, it's where we will officially be married.

More memories come to mind: our first kiss in the gypsy camp, escaping the Rakshana and Miss McCleethy, and that night on the Thames. A blush stains my cheeks as I recall the more intimate moments, like our private dance in the stables on Christmas, his first trip to the realms, returning from the battle, him proposing. All at once, I want nothing more than to be at his side, in his arms.

Before I know what is happening, Father brings me to a stop. We've reached the altar. Father's dry lips brush mine in a swift kiss before he makes his way to his seat beside Grandmama, whose tears are now streaming steadily down her cheeks. Kartik gazes at me with a dazed, adoring look in his eyes. Felicity and Ann stand together a few feet away, wearing identical smiles. Fee winks when she catches my eye; Ann giggles. Tom is behind Kartik, glassy eyes blinking furiously as he watches Kartik take my hand.

Reverend Waite clears his throat to begin the ceremony. I hardly pay attention. Kartik's brown eyes bore into my green ones, his hand grips mine tightly. We don't need to speak aloud to communicate; today, our feelings are displayed proudly on our faces for all to see.

I go through the ceremony in a daze, paying attention only to Kartik. Distantly, I hear the reverend saying our names, but I do not look up. Kartik's lips move, forming the words "I do." His voice rings in my ears like a sweet lullaby, and I smile shyly at him as he takes my glove off of my left hand, revealing the henna and sliding a sleek ring onto my finger.

Reverend Waite says our names again, but this time he addresses me.

"I do," I somehow manage to croak, drawing soft chuckles from my guests as I slip Kartik's matching ring onto his finger. Kartik's smile dazzles me, radiating pleasure and elation. A laugh bubbles up in my throat, and I let it out, giggling happily with my hands entwined in Kartik's. Over my laughter, I hear Reverend Waite utter one last phrase before shutting his Bible with a snap.

Kartik pulls me into his chest. I press my lips to his, ecstasy soaring through my veins. Our audience applauds politely as we pull apart, still gripping each other's hands.

"I love you, Gemma Ishana," Kartik whispers, pressing his forehead against mine. Before I can reply, Fee materializes suddenly at my side.

"Talk later, it's time to go," she says, smiling at us, "and congratulations."

Laughing, Kartik and I head back down the aisle. Our guests pelt us with bird feed, for fertility, as we run hand-in-hand to our carriage. Kartik hoists me into the cab before joining me, smiling at the well-wishers. The horses pulling the carriage start forwards, and I lean out of my window, waving. Kartik's warm body presses against mine as he mimics me, chuckling lightly at our colorful audience.

Some of the younger guests—and Fee and Ann— chase us with handfuls of orange blossoms (the leftovers of Fee's decorating splurge), running as fast as their corseted bodies will allow and calling gleefully after us. I laugh and call back to them, remembering when I had done the same as recently as Mademoiselle LeFarge's ceremony. Once all of their load lays strewn behind our carriage in a trail of blazing color, our pursuers stop, waving one last time before returning to the chapel. Fee and Ann remain behind, their blue dresses standing out among the green grass, standing on their toes and waving frantically.

I pull myself back inside the cab once they are finally out of sight, shaking my head. I settle myself onto Kartik's waiting lap, arranging my skirts carefully before throwing my arms around him and pressing against him in a very enthusiastic kiss.

Neither of us feel the need to separate. I cling to him, and his hands hold me close until a particularly violent bump from the carriage jostles me out of Kartik's lap. Chuckling, he helps me back into my old position, his arms staying around me.

"We finally did it," I whisper, tucking my head under his chin. Kartik nods.

"We finally did," he agrees, squeezing me gently. I feel him grinning. "Gemma Ishana. My wife."

I smile hugely into his chest. "I love to hear you say that."

Kartik laughs. He fingers my gloves delicately. I glance down at them. The outline of my henna tattoo is visible through the white fabric. I slide the gloves off, admiring yet again the intricate swirls that cover my hands.

A dark finger traces the pattern gently, the new wedding band glinting on its ring finger. Kartik is silent, eyes staring at my hands, my eyes, and my lips in turn. I let him think, content for now just to watch him. Finally, he speaks.

"We're going to need a house of our own."

"We have your apartment," I point out, ignoring my involuntary shudder at the thought of living in that dreadful alley, "and we don't need anything fancy. We're fine for now."

"For now, maybe…but that is not a suitable place for children."

I bolt upright and stare at him. "You want children?"

"Of course I do," Kartik sounds surprised. "Unless you don't."

I shake my head vehemently. "Of _course_ I want children!"

Kartik smiles and kisses my neck. "Good," he says, adjusting his arms around me so that I am pressed more securely to his chest.

For a moment, I don't talk, trying to choose one of the thousands of questions swarming through my head. "What do you think they'll look like? Our children, I mean."

Kartik strokes my arm thoughtfully. "Perfect," he answers simply, planting a kiss on my head, "because they will be like their mother."

I blush at his sentimentality and bury my head further in his embrace, letting his enticing smell envelop me. "Perfect would be their father," I correct softly, blushing again at the almost sickening sappiness of my words, but knowing I cannot take them back.

Kartik chuckles and brushes his lips across the little skin showing over my neckline. I lift my hand to his hair, running my fingers through it and thinking. The image of Kartik and me standing in the parlor of our own house, balancing our children on our knees, sends waves of pleasure radiating through me. Our future life flashes in my mind's eye like a play on a stage. A comfortable little home in London, a small stable in the back, children running about, and, most importantly, Kartik and me, together.

Almost as if can read my thoughts, Kartik kisses the top of my head softly.

"Gemma," he murmurs, "I love you."

I shift so that I can see his face, smiling. "I love you too, Kartik. Truly."

**Gemma and Kartik are married. Yay? Not yay? Why don't you click the pretty purple button and tell me what you thought. I tried to research more Hindu traditions, but it was so hard to get that and Victorian English traditions to work together that I had to scimp on some. Sorry if it's not as cultural as you hoped, I really did try.**

**Personal news: I'm going back home (New Jersey) on Friday!! I can't wait, it's been too long since I've visited for long enough. And I get to see my old horse friends! YAY! And in other random news, I totally beat my friend's butt in Harry Potter SceneIt. Yay, me!**

**Enjoying her summer vacation,  
Brighteyes**


	20. Epilogue

**Hi, guys. Thank you so, so much for the reviews for last chapter, and for every chapter before that. It's both completely upsetting and increbibly relieving to say that this is the last update for this story. I just want to thank everyone who read, reviewed, favorited, or alerted this story in the past few months. You guys are all amazing, and I wish I could send you all a present. :)**

**Instead, I give you the epilogue to Sweet Complications, which is dedicated to all of you. Enjoy, and thanks.**

**Disclaimer: Libba Bray owns all of these. Isn't it nice of her to let me steal...er, borrow them?**

Six years later

_Dear Fee,_

_I'm glad to hear you're coming to visit, and that you and Nicole are well. Of course I'll come with you to see Ann's play; Kartik and I were already planning on attending, and it's been too long since the three of us were together. Please feel free to visit us here any time; you know you're always welcome._

_To answer your other question, no, there has not been any trouble since you last wrote. Philon and Gorgon and Asha are keeping a close eye on things for me. We haven't had any visitors lately, nor have any stories reached our ears. The last time I visited the realms, everything was in order. My visions have been rather quiet lately, only a few scenes of the realms. Little skirmishes, mostly. Nothing to worry about._

_Tell Nicole I said hello, and I hope to see you both soon._

_Love, Gemma_

I slip my letter into the envelope and seal it, leaning back in my armchair. Fee's letter sits next to my newly completed one. I smile at it, remembering my vivacious friend's enthusiastic description of her life in Paris with her partner, Nicole. Apparently, her trousers have begun to spread among the other women, much to Fee's delight, and to her parent's silent horror. Neither of them have been to see their only daughter, and Felicity hasn't gone to them since moving to Paris shortly after my wedding. She is quite content to stay in Paris, where she spends her days posing for artists (clothed, of course).

While Fee is making a splash in Paris, Ann is flourishing in her stage career here in London. After marrying Charlie nearly five years ago, the two of them have paired up in many plays, with him writing and her performing. I've never seen Ann so happy, so alive, and Charlie seems just as content with her as his wife. Their first child, a charming two-year-old girl named Macy, seems to have inherited her mother's thrilling voice, much to the delight of her parents. Ann hasn't heard from her cousins and would-be employers in years, and doesn't seem to care, either. She's got her dream life, and wouldn't have it any other way.

Both of my friends write constantly, and I often meet with Ann in her spare time. We all keep watchful eyes out for any signs of magic or creatures of the realms, but nothing amiss has happened since the incident with Haresh six years ago, aside from a few stray creatures venturing out in curiosity, but none of them have presented any problems. They all seem to have learned from the centaur and Neela's fatal mistakes.

A slightly blurry picture on the mantle nearby flashes in the fading light, catching my eye. It's a family photo, centered around Father, and Tom, and me, taken the last time we had visited Father in India. I rather despise it, but I leave it on display so Tom doesn't make a fuss. In it, Tom looks as smug as ever, his haughty eyes almost laughing at the camera. A woman stands next to him, smiling blandly. She is his wife, the lovely and rich Delia, whose money comes from who knows how many generations back. I suppose he could have done worse, but a plainer thinker would be hard to find.

My eyes drift to Father on Tom's other side. His suit hands loosely on him, as if he's lost quite a bit of weight since purchasing it, which I don't doubt he has. I had tried not to look at him too much throughout this trip, for the sight of the haunted, empty ghost of my father had made me want to cry. I am on Father's other side, smiling tightly and plainly wishing I was anywhere but there. Kartik stands on my right, his arm draped securely over my shoulder. No one seems truly happy in this photograph, although Tom and Delia are doing their best to appear so.

"Mama!" a young, high voice calls to me from the other room. "Mama, Kally won't go to bed!"

Two small shapes hurtle into the parlor and throw themselves at me. I sigh and bend so that I am eye-level with my two children. The oldest, Rikash, is the spitting image of his father, except for the flecks of green in his dark eyes and the lighter tone to his brown skin. His head full of curly black hair flops into his curious eyes. At five years old, his chin reaches the crook above my hip as he clings beseechingly to my skirts.

His sister, Kalasin, gazes pleadingly at me with eyes almost as green as my own. Her hair is reddish-brown, and her freckled skin the color of coffee. Two years younger than her brother, the top of her head falls quite short of my hips, though if she is at all like me or her brother, she will soon come to a growth spurt. She is a constant worry for me, and I wonder if it was the same for my mother, this waiting for her to reach the age when she will come into her powers. Already clad in a nightgown, little Kally bounces up and down with little girl vitality, sticking out her plump bottom lip.

Both children tug on my nightgown, Kally begging to stay up and visit her pony, Rikash saying he won't sleep until she does. I sigh again.

"Hush," I order gently, and they close their mouths. "Kally, I've told you a hundred times, your pony needs to sleep, and so do you. He's still going to be there in the morning. No arguments," I say, cutting off the sulky reply I know my daughter is preparing to make, "you can go to the stable _tomorrow_. Besides, you're already dressed for bed, and I've told you your bedtime story."

Kally nods sadly. I turn to my son.

"Rikash, if Kally can't stay up late, neither can you." Rikash pouts, and I shake my head. "That is final. Alright?"

"Yes, Mama," both Rikash and Kally chorus.

"Good. Give me a kiss, then." They brush their lips against my cheeks briefly. Kally yawns, and I choke back a laugh. "Goodnight, my dears. Now scamp."

Giggling, Kally chases Rikash, her thee-year-old legs pumping furiously to keep up with him. I straighten again, smiling, as they gallop through the halls and up the stair case. The sound of slamming doors echoing from upstairs, just as another figure appears in the doorway.

Kartik walks towards me, arms outstretched and smiling. I slip into his hold and kiss him, taking in his intoxicating scent with a contented sigh.

"Hello." He looks at me fondly. "Did Kally put up a fight again?"

"Of course. She wanted to go to the stables." Kartik laughs, and I smile at him. "She is definitely your daughter," I tell him, fingering his coat. "Never leaves those horses alone."

"Mmm…" Kartik murmurs, kissing me again. I feel his hands tracing the buttons of my dress.

"Let's go upstairs," I suggest, smiling coyly. Grasping my hand, he pulls me up the stairs, making as little noise as possible. I let my eyes wander over Kartik. Six years hasn't done much to age him. I can still see the striking features, heavy lashes, and curly hair of the boy I fell in love with. He's taller now, though, and his chest broader and well-muscled from working with horses. His personality hasn't changed much, either, as he's still the protective, sweet, brooding man I met years ago.

Kartik opens the door to our room and hold it for me. I walk past him, and hear the soft thud as he closes the door again. I turn to face my husband.

"Come here," he says, grasping my hands gently and guiding me to the bed. I let myself fall back first, smiling flirtatiously up at him as he stands beside me. Gently, slowly, he lowers himself onto the bed, lying parallel to me. He reaches across my chest, grasps my hand, and pulls me around to face him. I plant my lips on his, worming closer into his body. He cradles my neck with his hand tenderly, deepening our kiss. His other hand wraps around my waist, securing my body to his.

Breaking away from our embrace, Kartik nuzzles my neck sweetly. The hand that holds my face to his releases me, only to come to rest at my back. I let my fingers explore Kartik, tracing his jaw line, smoothing his shirt collar. His lips glide across the ivory skin visible over the plunging neckline of my nightgown. I reach up with my empty hand and free my curls from their pins, letting them drape across my shoulders. Kartik brushes them away with a gentle hand, and I settle my head on his chest, listening to his familiar and steady heartbeat.

"You would think," Kartik muses aloud through our contented silence, "that after six years, you would cease to have such an intoxicating effect on me."

I smile up at him. "I could say the same about you."

"Mmm…" Kartik hums, and the familiar, yet still thrilling, surge of desire sweeps through me. "I was lucky to have found you, Gem."

A soft chuckle escapes me. "'Found' isn't completely accurate."

We both fall silent, remembering our early relationship. Threats, danger, and the elusive Rakshana had been the base of our acquaintance, always shadowed by a deep, mysterious force that kept us wanting more of the other.

At the other end of the hallway, Rikash snores gently. I remember when he was born. I had screamed and cried, and Kartik had held my hand his terror plainly displayed in his wide eyes. Fee had been visiting form Paris, and she waited in another room with Ann, Tom, Father (who had return from India to meet his first grandchild), and Grandmama. When I finally held Rikash in my arms, I had cried all over again, this time from happiness. Kartik's eyes had been moist, too, as he gently pressed his soft lips to mine, whispering about how proud he was of me, then bent to kiss our son's head.

Parenthood had deepened my already powerful bond with Kartik, and two years later, baby Kalasin arrived, kicking and screaming. This time, Grandmama hadn't been there to welcome her second great-grandchild into the world; she had died of old age about a month before I had discovered I was pregnant. Father, too, was ill, but his doctor had allowed him a quick visit. But all sad thoughts had faded from my mind as I watched my husband cradle our newborn daughter and introduce her to Rikash before kissing me warmly.

Other random memories come to mind: watching Kartik teach our children how to ride their ponies, stolen trips into the realms, listening to Kally gibbering incoherently to her brother. In every memory, Kartik is present, always there, watching over me and our family. I sometimes think he could never completely forget the true purpose of the Rakshana: to protect their priestess. Nothing happens to me that Kartik doesn't know about, and his protective nature only brings me closer to him.

A gentle touch on my back brings me out of my daydream. Kartik smiles down at me.

"Sorry to bother you," he whispers, "but you looked distracted. Is something wrong?"

"No," I answer, smiling reassuringly. "I was only thinking."

"May I ask what you were thinking about?"

"As if you didn't know," I laugh, wrapping my arms around his waist. "I was thinking about you."

Smiling, Kartik dips his head slightly, and I let myself sink into his kiss. His lips, gentle and sweet, send sparks through my veins. I am enveloped in his wonderful scent, the alluring perfume that makes my head spin delightedly. All too soon, Kartik pulls away, though he stays close enough so that I can still feel his breath on my cheeks. I shake my head, not wanting to let him go and straining to kiss him again, but he just smiles at me.

"It's late, Gemma," he murmurs. "You are tired. Sleep."

"I am not— "A huge yawn cuts off the rest of my sentence. I scowl at Kartik's amused face. "Oh, alright, I'm tired." A smile lifts the corner of my lips, ruining my false anger. Kartik laughs quietly, and swiftly brushes his soft mouth against mine, then trails his lips over my haw to whisper in my ear.

"Good night, my gem. I love you."

I smile drowsily, already half asleep. "I love you, too."

Silence fills the room as Kartik's fingers trace the lines in my nightgown, one of his favorite pastimes. The familiar feeling quickly starts to lull me to sleep. Eyes already closed, a sleep thought enters my head.

"Kartik?"

"Hmm?"

I smile, eyes still shut. "Tomorrow, I'm not going to sleep so easily."

Kartik kisses my neck softly. "Then I won't ask you to."

**Done. I just finished my first fanfic. I can't believe it, but it's true. Again, thanks for everyone who read this. It means a lot to me that you guys liked this story so much. Hugs, kisses, and chocolate to all of you.**

**In personal news, I'm thoroughly enjoying my vacation in my hometown. I got to hang out with LunaEquus (even though I know her as Catherine...) and see my horse friends. Yay. :)**

**Oh, and I hope at least one person notived how Gemma tells Kally bedtime stories. They're about the realms, obviously. So, in case someone asks, YES the kiddies know about the realms, BUT not that they're real. Yet. I figured Gemma would tell her kids, eventually.**

**Until next time, lovelies,  
Brighteyes**

**P.S.- Don't expect this to be my last fic in the fandom. I've still got Fading Scars to finish, and a couple other fics in mind, though most of them will end up on the cutting room floor. I've also been toying with the idea of writing oneshots in the Sweet Comp. world, where Kartik is alive, like when Rikash and Kally were born, their first return trip to the realms, blah blah blah. So I promise, I will be seeing you guys soon. :)**


End file.
